Gambling Addiction - Need Help, A Chat - Read This!

[brucey]

17 minutes ago, Fathead1981 said:

Thanks Brucey just signed up to this as today is normally the worst day for me as its payday and usually the day I spunk 100's if not 1000's up the wall, thanks for the information. It sounds weird, and please don't think I take it like a pleasure, but i'm almost glad that there are so many others who admit to stuggling with this as in my darkest moments you can think you are the only one suffering from this and that everyone else would be critical of you if you opened up.

Well done for taking that first step mate  it might not be easy, but you can beat this! 

Have a look around on the Gamcare forums, it's the best support forum out there. Reading other people's diaries has been very helpful for me when getting urges.

This is a great place to start:

https://www.gamcare.org.uk/forum/want-do-something-read

Edited 24 August 2018 by brucey

[Ric Flair]

On 24/08/2018 at 06:40, stripeyfox said:

This post could be a big first step mate. It takes a lot of balls to post that. It's honest and you're not blaming anyone other than yourself. You need to try and find a way to break the cycle and I know that ain't easy, but you're not even 40 yet so you still have a long time to go in your life. I'd urge you to contact GA or some other organisation that can help, because I don't think you can do this on your own and nor should you have to. I really wish you the best of luck mate. I'd also reach out to people like @Ric Flair and keep posting on here. This is a great community - see the "Depression" thread for examples of this - lots of help, support and advice with no moral judgement.

 

@Fathead1981

Spot on. The hardest thing you can do as a gambler is to fully come clean, not only to your loved ones, friends and family but to yourself. You are essentially admitting defeat, even though you've been defeated over and over again every time you've suffered horrendous losses. The short term measures to help are GAMSTOP, blockers on your smart devices and there's online sites to ban you from bookies and casinos. It just makes any urge to gamble a lot harder to give in to as there's many obstacles, it's not fool proof and you've always got to have a desire to abstain but it's the only way in the short term you're going to cope. It's actually quite comforting knowing you can't devastate yourself quite so freely.

 

The biggest thing though, to be able to move on and put it behind you and start to respect yourself again is to tell the truth. Tell the truth everyday to yourself and to the people that mean the most to you. I know you say you can't let your parents down again but there comes a point when you as a person are ready to change. All your parents care about is your well being, they love you unconditionally and they've proven that with desperately wanting to help you all of those times with bailing you out. Now, we both know that didn't curb your problem, it's not as simple as that. However, you will earn a lot of respect from your parents when you beat this. Actions speak louder than words, you don't need the financial help. You've got no regard for money, like me. It's all on you now. Call Gamcare and start the process. Financially you can get help from Stepchange, they will help you sort it. I'm not sure what your credit rating is like at the minute, but if you're in a bad way then you've very little to lose anyway and they'll make everything more manageable but without bailing you out for free reign again.

 

Keep your head up mate

[Ric Flair]

25 minutes ago, Fathead1981 said:

Thanks Brucey just signed up to this as today is normally the worst day for me as its payday and usually the day I spunk 100's if not 1000's up the wall, thanks for the information. It sounds weird, and please don't think I take it like a pleasure, but i'm almost glad that there are so many others who admit to stuggling with this as in my darkest moments you can think you are the only one suffering from this and that everyone else would be critical of you if you opened up.

Well done mate, my recent post was reiterating doing this

[Ric Flair]

17 minutes ago, brucey said:

Well done for taking that first step mate  it might not be easy, but you can beat this! 

Have a look around on the Gamcare forums, it's the best support forum out there. Reading other people's diaries has been very helpful for me when getting urges.

This is a great place to start:

https://www.gamcare.org.uk/forum/want-do-something-read

I echo this 100%

[Ric Flair]

56 minutes ago, HighPeakFox said:

Just found this thread, and had to wait for my daily restriction to lift before I could add a few words. I, like a previous contributor, am wary of coming across as anything other than understanding or supportive.

I'm lucky - I was a fruit machine addict, I quit when 17, and like the estimable @Ric Flair, I attended GA in Leicester and have not touched one of those machines since. This is not to say I haven't gambled since - I have - but my addiction was pretty specific/focussed, and the odd bet on a football match, or playing stakes at rubber bridge (an activity I have a semblance of control over, unlike a fruit machine) seems not to get me into trouble.

However....it's worth saying that although losing enormous sums of cash is a very high price to pay for everyone connected to compulsive gambling, even low-level losses (such as mine were) wrought personal damage on me, and I am pretty certain that the emotional and social difficulties that led to my addictive behaviour are still with me, and have certainly affected me emotionally throughout my adult life (I'm nearly 48 now).

One other thing to add, in case it's helpful. At GA, at the beginning of meetings, we would all declare that we ARE a compulsive gambler - in other words, it doesn't just melt away, the urge just weakens and we (hopefully) replace it with something more wholesome, however, we never truly beat it. Life is full of temptations, and given that our entire economy appears (to me, anyway) to be predicated upon weapons-grade gambling, it is perhaps a very understandable habit that many of us form. People say that admitting the problem is the hardest step - I'm not convinced by that, I think that doing what it takes to stop is harder.

Always here if anyone wants to PM me

This thread has been a massive eye opener, it's hurts me greatly how many of us have suffered or are suffering from gambling. I was so naïve at first as to how big a problem gambling is and I continue to be shocked. Good on you mate for your battle and for gaining control, I know it's come at a cost as you say emotionally. I would suggest that it's never too late to try and work on that, you've still got a lot of good years ahead of you and deserve to life a happy and content life, if you can free your mind from the battle scars then there's no stopping you. Gamcare offer free counselling sessions, I've actually got one in 30 mins via a Skype sort of set up with a practitioner. They are amazing people and could offer you some sessions that will probably work it's way back to the torment you suffered in your teens on fruit machines etc.

 

[stripeyfox]

1 hour ago, Fathead1981 said:

Thanks Brucey just signed up to this as today is normally the worst day for me as its payday and usually the day I spunk 100's if not 1000's up the wall, thanks for the information. It sounds weird, and please don't think I take it like a pleasure, but i'm almost glad that there are so many others who admit to stuggling with this as in my darkest moments you can think you are the only one suffering from this and that everyone else would be critical of you if you opened up.

Not weird at all. When you're alone and isolated with your thoughts and demons it is terrifying. So to know others are in the same boat is comforting in any scenario. 

That's why it is important to share like this. Ric seems to have come out the other side and is now using his experiences to help others on here. That's got to be the goal for you mate. Might take a while to get there but experiences like yours and his are invaluable in helping others along in the future.

[davieG]

I was a bit dubious about starting this topic as I could see so many on here seem to gamble in a @lighthearted' way that I was expecting a load of snowflake comments and free choice etc.

I've never had a problem myself I used to make a few bets on the horses when I first started work as an apprentice as the place had an unofficial bookies runner but it never real grabbed me other than that a few bets on the Grand National many years ago.

My son does some online betting and he often says how easy it is to do it on his phone although I don't think it's serious I've always worried that he might get hooked.

It's so much in your face these days it's getting to a stage where some my think they're not normal for not getting into it.

To anyone who has a problem and it must be a nightmare like any addiction is so I wish them all the best in trying to come through it.

 

[Max Wall]

12 minutes ago, davieG said:

I was a bit dubious about starting this topic as I could see so many on here seem to gamble in a @lighthearted' way that I was expecting a load of snowflake comments and free choice etc.

It's so much in your face these days it's getting to a stage where some my think they're not normal for not getting into it.

To anyone who has a problem and it must be a nightmare like any addiction is so I wish them all the best in trying to come through it.

 

I can understand your concern Davie. However, just from the few posts so far, it already has members talking about it, which has to be good. If the support anyone receives/gives on here helps even one person it's been worthwhile. 

[The Syrup]

12 hours ago, brucey said:

This actually exists now, it launched a month or two ago. It covers all UK registered gambling sites. Only takes five minutes to sign up - https://www.gamstop.co.uk. It's the single best thing you can do if your issue is with the online stuff.

Cheers for this... just signed up. 5 year exclusion. Also self excluded from my National Lottery account, used to play their online instant win games quite a bit when I ran out of casinos I could use.

[brucey]

10 minutes ago, The Syrup said:

Cheers for this... just signed up. 5 year exclusion. Also self excluded from my National Lottery account, used to play their online instant win games quite a bit when I ran out of casinos I could use.

Well done mate!! All about putting those barriers in to allow the mind time to recover 

[HighPeakFox]

Proud to 'know' every single person on this and the Depression thread. 

[Ric Flair]

2 hours ago, davieG said:

I was a bit dubious about starting this topic as I could see so many on here seem to gamble in a @lighthearted' way that I was expecting a load of snowflake comments and free choice etc.

I've never had a problem myself I used to make a few bets on the horses when I first started work as an apprentice as the place had an unofficial bookies runner but it never real grabbed me other than that a few bets on the Grand National many years ago.

My son does some online betting and he often says how easy it is to do it on his phone although I don't think it's serious I've always worried that he might get hooked.

It's so much in your face these days it's getting to a stage where some my think they're not normal for not getting into it.

To anyone who has a problem and it must be a nightmare like any addiction is so I wish them all the best in trying to come through it.

 

I can only applaud and thank you for starting this because it is something i'd considered doing recently but decided to park it whilst on my own road to recovery. I did do a topic of sorts on it 5-6 years ago which was why I refrained from doing so again, I am aware of how difficult overcoming a gambling addiction can be and not to preach or be so self absorbed. Your topic gave me reason to say my story which was hugely emotional and therapeutic, and has given me a fresh impetus of being able to share my experiences and bits of advice that have worked for me. At GA, one of the main reasons of why it's effective for those who buy in to it is because you talk about your problems and the triggers and you kind of cross a line externally where you know how wrong it is to ever return to where you previously were. So many people who stop going to GA revert back to their old habits, so it shows that GA alone won't permanently change you and that's why I'm not resting on my laurels in my search for change but it gives you a way of coping every day and week at a time and it's a powerful place. You walk out of there and feel so determined and positive about your future, I wouldn't be without that group of people from all walks of life. They are my saviour and although it's all on me to do this, I acknowledge just how important they are and the role it plays.

[stripeyfox]

This thread should be Pinned to the top of the forum and the crucial information about sites where you can self exclude should be edited into the first post I think.

 

If the "Betting thread" is pinned, then this definitely should be imo

 

 

[Guest MattP]

This is something quite close to me, I'm also someone who had had to seek help regarding this problem. 

I didn't want to post this as people know me but I don't care anymore, if it helps one person it's well worth it - this is my story from last year and I've copied and pasted it, I sent it to a few people struggling with a gambling addiction (and a couple of friends on here) in the depression thread if you have read it before I apologise. 

Bascially I've been a gambling addict now for well over ten years and finally decided to tell everyone close to me a few months back, a few of them knew, certainly my family but it really is a "hidden" addiction, no signs of it to anyone and I have always been someone who has been very good at hiding problems.

My life was pretty much the same routine every single month between the age of 28-35 ie I would get paid and start gambling, I even set my alarm at 2.30am for when the money went in so I could gamble on American sports, I had to then go at 3am as soon as I had set a bet up to then get £300 out the cash machine to live on for the month before I lost everything else, from that moment on I would either be rich or skint by the next day, I'd either have a grand or nothing in the betting account and sometimes by the time I went to work at 7am the same day. That was often a huge trigger for short term depression and I often spent a weekend without money to go out or gamble and that basically meant I would just sit in bed 24/7 over what was supposed to be the best part of the week. 

It cost me jobs, relationships and the chance of owning a house, something I could already had paid for had I not been so stupid. (I was earning good money a few years back, not now) I lost about £15,000 in loans, £10,000 on cards, thankfully this was before I earnt anything half decent so I was already blocked from borrowing. All in with wages I must have lost well into 6 figures, down the toilet.

Even before the 24/7 iphone betting etc I was bad but you couldnt get to a bookies at midnight so I could sort of get away with it, apart from one time when I once took my girlfriend on holiday to Torquay and didn't have enough money, I was meeting her in the train station and had 500 quid on me, I lost it in the bookies on Charles Street with suitcase in hand on the way to meet her trying to double it. 

If I was going on a trip or going on holiday I would have to send the money to someone else as soon as I got paid, otherwise as I said it could be gone by the morning.

I remember once posting on here that I was off to Australia the week after next, right after I did it I had to go and get a credit card to fund the journey as the spending money I had intended to save was long gone. Then on that trip I had to borrow a grand off a mate because I lost all my spending money on the dogs, what kind of sane person lands in another country with a week to go and loses all his money on racing animals? It's crazy.

It all crashed on me on a night in Feb, I had a payment of £100 quid sent through and I lost it over the space of a couple of hours, finally just broke down in tears and cried until midday, something then clicked in me that wanted to stop it and I rang up Gamcare and then sent me on a trip to Nottingham the week after to see a specialist, I went on that and it did do some good but in reality the big step in beating it for me was the admittal, as soon as I had done that I felt good and the desire to lose cash seemed to have gone, the first couple of months was hard and I had to send money to other people to hold it, that was horrible and embarrassing for a grown man.

It's weird, I can still play things like the lotto (though not cards) and buy a raffle ticket but any sort of enviroment where immediate gambling and the chance to blow everything is there I have to stay well away (another thing is I've started to enjoy sports again, aside from the City and England cricket I was edge of my seat as anything I watched I had to gamble on)

I've been off it now since March and it's still hard at times, I log into my bank account on my phone literally every couple of hours and when I see the avaliable balance with money in (something I'm still getting used to as that's not been a part of my life since early 20's) I still get a small craving that takes a lot of willpower to hold to but I'm getting there.

Gamcare were brilliant, you can see a professional in Nottingham and it's worth it, he even hilariously gave away a name of a Forest player to me Larry David style as I guessed and he went red, seriously its so relaxing and telling people is that weight off your shoulders. You feel so good after it yet you are so fearful of doing it.

The feeling of rock bottom and the tears you'll have thinking you can't do this are terrible, but you can beat it. If I can beat it anyone can. Speak up, so much help out there. 

Edited 24 August 2018 by MattP

[Ric Flair]

5 minutes ago, MattP said:

This is something quite close to me, I'm also someone who had had to seek help regarding this problem. 

I didn't want to post this as people know me but I don't care anymore, if it helps one person it's well worth it - this is my story from last year and I've copied and pasted it, I sent it to a few people struggling with a gambling addiction (and a couple of friends on here) in the depression thread if you have read it before I apologise. 

Bascially I've been a gambling addict now for well over ten years and finally decided to tell everyone close to me a few months back, a few of them knew, certainly my family but it really is a "hidden" addiction, no signs of it to anyone and I have always been someone who has been very good at hiding problems.

My life was pretty much the same routine every single month between the age of 28-35 ie I would get paid and start gambling, I even set my alarm at 2.30am for when the money went in so I could gamble on American sports, I had to then go at 3am as soon as I had set a bet up to then get £300 out the cash machine to live on for the month before I lost everything else, from that moment on I would either be rich or skint by the next day, I'd either have a grand or nothing in the betting account and sometimes by the time I went to work at 7am the same day. That was often a huge trigger for short term depression and I often spent a weekend without money to go out or gamble and that basically meant I would just sit in bed 24/7 over what was supposed to be the best part of the week. 

It cost me jobs, relationships and the chance of owning a house, something I could already had paid for had I not been so stupid. (I was earning good money a few years back, not now) I lost about £15,000 in loans, £10,000 on cards, thankfully this was before I earnt anything half decent so I was already blocked from borrowing. All in with wages I must have lost well into 6 figures, down the toilet.

Even before the 24/7 iphone betting etc I was bad but you couldnt get to a bookies at midnight so I could sort of get away with it, apart from one time when I once took my girlfriend on holiday to Torquay and didn't have enough money, I was meeting her in the train station and had 500 quid on me, I lost it in the bookies on Charles Street with suitcase in hand on the way to meet her trying to double it. 

If I was going on a trip or going on holiday I would have to send the money to someone else as soon as I got paid, otherwise as I said it could be gone by the morning.

I remember once posting on here that I was off to Australia the week after next, right after I did it I had to go and get a credit card to fund the journey as the spending money I had intended to save was long gone. Then on that trip I had to borrow a grand off a mate because I lost all my spending money on the dogs, what kind of sane person lands in another country with a week to go and loses all his money on racing animals? It's crazy.

It all crashed on me on a night in Feb, I had a payment of £100 quid sent through and I lost it over the space of a couple of hours, finally just broke down in tears and cried until midday, something then clicked in me that wanted to stop it and I rang up Gamcare and then sent me on a trip to Nottingham the week after to see a specialist, I went on that and it did do some good but in reality the big step in beating it for me was the admittal, as soon as I had done that I felt good and the desire to lose cash seemed to have gone, the first couple of months was hard and I had to send money to other people to hold it, that was horrible and embarrassing for a grown man.

It's weird, I can still play things like the lotto (though not cards) and buy a raffle ticket but any sort of enviroment where immediate gambling and the chance to blow everything is there I have to stay well away (another thing is I've started to enjoy sports again, aside from the City and England cricket I was edge of my seat as anything I watched I had to gamble on)

I've been off it now since March and it's still hard at times, I log into my bank account on my phone literally every couple of hours and when I see the avaliable balance with money in (something I'm still getting used to as that's not been a part of my life since early 20's) I still get a small craving that takes a lot of willpower to hold to but I'm getting there.

Gamcare were brilliant, you can see a professional in Nottingham and it's worth it, he even hilariously gave away a name of a Forest player to me Larry David style as I guessed and he went red, seriously its so relaxing and telling people is that weight off your shoulders. You feel so good after it yet you are so fearful of doing it.

The feeling of rock bottom and the tears you'll have thinking you can't do this are terrible, but you can beat it. If I can beat it anyone can. Speak up, so much help out there. 

Well said mate. I wish you all the best in your recovery, you can do this. We are flawed people but we won't let it define us and there's so much to live for.

[Guest MattP]

3 minutes ago, Ric Flair said:

Well said mate. I wish you all the best in your recovery, you can do this. We are flawed people but we won't let it define us and there's so much to live for.

Absolutely. 

The biggest thing for me now is trying to make sure my mind realises that I'm getting enjoyment from the things I spend my money on, it doesn't even matter if it's a book, a sandwich, a football ticket etc - it's far far better than just losing it on a challenger tennis match at midnight without ever seeing it. 

Its hard though, I still look at odds 24/7 - it's impossible not too as that's the lifestyle you are into, it's mathematics for us but unlike others it drains our bank account. It's absolutely crazy when you think about it.

Have you got to the stage yet of watching horse racing whilst off it? We start picking winners out of thin air - soon as the money comes out that goes though. 

[davieG]

1 hour ago, stripeyfox said:

This thread should be Pinned to the top of the forum and the crucial information about sites where you can self exclude should be edited into the first post I think.

 

If the "Betting thread" is pinned, then this definitely should be imo

 

 

OP Edited and pinned.

If anyone has any suggestions to add or change the OP let me know.

[stripeyfox]

6 minutes ago, davieG said:

OP Edited and pinned.

If anyone has any suggestions to add or change the OP let me know.

Cheers mate. If it helps anyone find this information when they desperately need it at some point in the future then it's worth it.

 

[Countryfox]

1 hour ago, MattP said:

This is something quite close to me, I'm also someone who had had to seek help regarding this problem. 

I didn't want to post this as people know me but I don't care anymore, if it helps one person it's well worth it - this is my story from last year and I've copied and pasted it, I sent it to a few people struggling with a gambling addiction (and a couple of friends on here) in the depression thread if you have read it before I apologise. 

Bascially I've been a gambling addict now for well over ten years and finally decided to tell everyone close to me a few months back, a few of them knew, certainly my family but it really is a "hidden" addiction, no signs of it to anyone and I have always been someone who has been very good at hiding problems.

My life was pretty much the same routine every single month between the age of 28-35 ie I would get paid and start gambling, I even set my alarm at 2.30am for when the money went in so I could gamble on American sports, I had to then go at 3am as soon as I had set a bet up to then get £300 out the cash machine to live on for the month before I lost everything else, from that moment on I would either be rich or skint by the next day, I'd either have a grand or nothing in the betting account and sometimes by the time I went to work at 7am the same day. That was often a huge trigger for short term depression and I often spent a weekend without money to go out or gamble and that basically meant I would just sit in bed 24/7 over what was supposed to be the best part of the week. 

It cost me jobs, relationships and the chance of owning a house, something I could already had paid for had I not been so stupid. (I was earning good money a few years back, not now) I lost about £15,000 in loans, £10,000 on cards, thankfully this was before I earnt anything half decent so I was already blocked from borrowing. All in with wages I must have lost well into 6 figures, down the toilet.

Even before the 24/7 iphone betting etc I was bad but you couldnt get to a bookies at midnight so I could sort of get away with it, apart from one time when I once took my girlfriend on holiday to Torquay and didn't have enough money, I was meeting her in the train station and had 500 quid on me, I lost it in the bookies on Charles Street with suitcase in hand on the way to meet her trying to double it. 

If I was going on a trip or going on holiday I would have to send the money to someone else as soon as I got paid, otherwise as I said it could be gone by the morning.

I remember once posting on here that I was off to Australia the week after next, right after I did it I had to go and get a credit card to fund the journey as the spending money I had intended to save was long gone. Then on that trip I had to borrow a grand off a mate because I lost all my spending money on the dogs, what kind of sane person lands in another country with a week to go and loses all his money on racing animals? It's crazy.

It all crashed on me on a night in Feb, I had a payment of £100 quid sent through and I lost it over the space of a couple of hours, finally just broke down in tears and cried until midday, something then clicked in me that wanted to stop it and I rang up Gamcare and then sent me on a trip to Nottingham the week after to see a specialist, I went on that and it did do some good but in reality the big step in beating it for me was the admittal, as soon as I had done that I felt good and the desire to lose cash seemed to have gone, the first couple of months was hard and I had to send money to other people to hold it, that was horrible and embarrassing for a grown man.

It's weird, I can still play things like the lotto (though not cards) and buy a raffle ticket but any sort of enviroment where immediate gambling and the chance to blow everything is there I have to stay well away (another thing is I've started to enjoy sports again, aside from the City and England cricket I was edge of my seat as anything I watched I had to gamble on)

I've been off it now since March and it's still hard at times, I log into my bank account on my phone literally every couple of hours and when I see the avaliable balance with money in (something I'm still getting used to as that's not been a part of my life since early 20's) I still get a small craving that takes a lot of willpower to hold to but I'm getting there.

Gamcare were brilliant, you can see a professional in Nottingham and it's worth it, he even hilariously gave away a name of a Forest player to me Larry David style as I guessed and he went red, seriously its so relaxing and telling people is that weight off your shoulders. You feel so good after it yet you are so fearful of doing it.

The feeling of rock bottom and the tears you'll have thinking you can't do this are terrible, but you can beat it. If I can beat it anyone can. Speak up, so much help out there. 

Fook me Matt what a story !! ...   this should be read out on the tv after every fookin stupid fooking betting advert !!!!!    

Glad you are now getting things sorted.    

[Ric Flair]

2 hours ago, MattP said:

Absolutely. 

The biggest thing for me now is trying to make sure my mind realises that I'm getting enjoyment from the things I spend my money on, it doesn't even matter if it's a book, a sandwich, a football ticket etc - it's far far better than just losing it on a challenger tennis match at midnight without ever seeing it. 

Its hard though, I still look at odds 24/7 - it's impossible not too as that's the lifestyle you are into, it's mathematics for us but unlike others it drains our bank account. It's absolutely crazy when you think about it.

Have you got to the stage yet of watching horse racing whilst off it? We start picking winners out of thin air - soon as the money comes out that goes though. 

Haha funnily enough my love of horse racing vanished instantly when I stopped gambling. I literally couldn't give a flying fcuk about horse racing now. I loved it though, used to be passionate about it all, yet now haven't an iota of interest. It'll be intruiging to see if that returns without gambling. Other sports such as golf and obviously football I'm still interested in but on a more natural level.

[Col city fan]

8 hours ago, Worthington said:

Sympathy to those of you with the courage to share your stories. Far more effective than any 'ad ban' or, dare one say, the 'stories of the stars' who have suffered!

Brings it down to a level where we can all say, " But for the grace of God" !!

Years ago, long before the gambling laws were eased, I worked for a bookies chain and some of the sights I witnessed back then tought me an awful lot.

I gambled myself then, though it was almost entirely only as the result of a background 'tip' or, for myself, 'Accas' with relatively small profit margins.

Since I left the trade I haven't succumbed beyond Placepots and similar plus the odd pre-match £5er, to win £50 odd, at FW.

The laws are too relaxed, there are too many adverts, (don't discount the bingo sites either, they're equally dangerous ). At last the government are seeing some of the signs. The in store 'bandit' machines, (worst bloody thing of all) are to be tackled and, I understand, there are measures in hand to re-install the 'secrecy screens' in branch windows....All very 'baby steps' though !

 Very true mate. How’s things btw?

[Col city fan]

2 hours ago, MattP said:

This is something quite close to me, I'm also someone who had had to seek help regarding this problem. 

I didn't want to post this as people know me but I don't care anymore, if it helps one person it's well worth it - this is my story from last year and I've copied and pasted it, I sent it to a few people struggling with a gambling addiction (and a couple of friends on here) in the depression thread if you have read it before I apologise. 

Bascially I've been a gambling addict now for well over ten years and finally decided to tell everyone close to me a few months back, a few of them knew, certainly my family but it really is a "hidden" addiction, no signs of it to anyone and I have always been someone who has been very good at hiding problems.

My life was pretty much the same routine every single month between the age of 28-35 ie I would get paid and start gambling, I even set my alarm at 2.30am for when the money went in so I could gamble on American sports, I had to then go at 3am as soon as I had set a bet up to then get £300 out the cash machine to live on for the month before I lost everything else, from that moment on I would either be rich or skint by the next day, I'd either have a grand or nothing in the betting account and sometimes by the time I went to work at 7am the same day. That was often a huge trigger for short term depression and I often spent a weekend without money to go out or gamble and that basically meant I would just sit in bed 24/7 over what was supposed to be the best part of the week. 

It cost me jobs, relationships and the chance of owning a house, something I could already had paid for had I not been so stupid. (I was earning good money a few years back, not now) I lost about £15,000 in loans, £10,000 on cards, thankfully this was before I earnt anything half decent so I was already blocked from borrowing. All in with wages I must have lost well into 6 figures, down the toilet.

Even before the 24/7 iphone betting etc I was bad but you couldnt get to a bookies at midnight so I could sort of get away with it, apart from one time when I once took my girlfriend on holiday to Torquay and didn't have enough money, I was meeting her in the train station and had 500 quid on me, I lost it in the bookies on Charles Street with suitcase in hand on the way to meet her trying to double it. 

If I was going on a trip or going on holiday I would have to send the money to someone else as soon as I got paid, otherwise as I said it could be gone by the morning.

I remember once posting on here that I was off to Australia the week after next, right after I did it I had to go and get a credit card to fund the journey as the spending money I had intended to save was long gone. Then on that trip I had to borrow a grand off a mate because I lost all my spending money on the dogs, what kind of sane person lands in another country with a week to go and loses all his money on racing animals? It's crazy.

It all crashed on me on a night in Feb, I had a payment of £100 quid sent through and I lost it over the space of a couple of hours, finally just broke down in tears and cried until midday, something then clicked in me that wanted to stop it and I rang up Gamcare and then sent me on a trip to Nottingham the week after to see a specialist, I went on that and it did do some good but in reality the big step in beating it for me was the admittal, as soon as I had done that I felt good and the desire to lose cash seemed to have gone, the first couple of months was hard and I had to send money to other people to hold it, that was horrible and embarrassing for a grown man.

It's weird, I can still play things like the lotto (though not cards) and buy a raffle ticket but any sort of enviroment where immediate gambling and the chance to blow everything is there I have to stay well away (another thing is I've started to enjoy sports again, aside from the City and England cricket I was edge of my seat as anything I watched I had to gamble on)

I've been off it now since March and it's still hard at times, I log into my bank account on my phone literally every couple of hours and when I see the avaliable balance with money in (something I'm still getting used to as that's not been a part of my life since early 20's) I still get a small craving that takes a lot of willpower to hold to but I'm getting there.

Gamcare were brilliant, you can see a professional in Nottingham and it's worth it, he even hilariously gave away a name of a Forest player to me Larry David style as I guessed and he went red, seriously its so relaxing and telling people is that weight off your shoulders. You feel so good after it yet you are so fearful of doing it.

The feeling of rock bottom and the tears you'll have thinking you can't do this are terrible, but you can beat it. If I can beat it anyone can. Speak up, so much help out there. 

[Col city fan]

57 minutes ago, Worthington said:

Odds against Col …. Update soon !

Pm me buddy

[lcfcben76]

Some very interesting yet hard hitting reads on here, has definitely opened my eyes to how bad it can get, so thanks to everyone who’s shared.

im only 19 myself and only started gambling this time last year, within a month I’d lost £200 within three consecutive days at the casino. The money was a lot at the time considering my job and my age and opened my eyes then. I’ve had some ups and downs since, barely go to the casino now and am rarely tempted, once you get it into your mindset that you’ll never make money from the casino it’s easier to stop. However, it must be said that self exclusion from online casinos is one of the best things you can do, having it right in front of you with the chance to make quick cash with a spin of a wheel is a killer. I do gamble a fair bit still with skybet, I’d say I enjoy sports more because of it and for that reason I do feel it has a positive effect on my life at the moment as it is a quick cure for boredom and enhances the experience of sport for me without losing a considerable amount of money.

As for the earlier question of why do you bet? For me it’s not particularly about the money, it’s strangely more of a pride thing and being able to brag about a great bet to my mates, the main reason for any big loss is seeing mates win big on stupid stuff like virtual sports and random stuff like Ice hockey ana I get the urge to try and better them which is quite sad really.

Again though a huge thanks to anyone who’s shared their stories on here. Has really opened my eyes and has probably saved me from falling into addiction later in life, all the best for anyone recovering.

Edited 24 August 2018 by lcfcben76

[stripeyfox]

It shows what a real problem this is when just in the first few pages of this thread there are at least a dozen posters who have or have had a problem with gambling. Just in the relatively small community of regular posters on FT!