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Daggers

What grinds my gears...

By Daggers, in General Chat

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Footballwipe

Footballwipe

Posted
Posted
18 hours ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

Over aggressive coaches for kids football teams.

The opposition coach this morning was the loudest, rudest, most intimidating one I’ve seen this season. 

Bollocking 9 year olds for playing like ‘fairies and netballers’ - what a cvnt.

You could tell the boys were scared of him and scared to make a mistake. I probably should have had a word but he was so wound up because we beat them.

Idiot.

Genuinely think there's some psychological study that could go into the behaviour of parents at football. Do you think it falls into one of the below options?

 

A) Desperately trying to live out their own failed ambitions through their own kids/kids they coach

B) An ultra competitive nature that doesn't have a filter

C) Molly-coddling their kids so much that when something doesn't go their way they get very overprotective/defensive

D) Anger issues

E) Too high expectations from their own parents that they're passing down onto their own kids/team

F) Coaches having far too high an opinion of themselves due to the power they have compared to the "real world"

G) Coaches having far too high an opinion of themselves because they're dead good on FM/FIFA

 

I genuinely don't know why a parent would put up with that shit. I'd be withdrawing any child I had straight out of that team and, if the poor kid still wanted to play, be finding a side which played for fun. Because surely you can play and enjoy yourself. What does it matter if the under 9's lose 9-0 every week. It's not going to psychologically damage them for eternity, is it?

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Izzy

Izzy

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2 hours ago, Footballwipe said:

Genuinely think there's some psychological study that could go into the behaviour of parents at football. Do you think it falls into one of the below options?

 

A) Desperately trying to live out their own failed ambitions through their own kids/kids they coach

B) An ultra competitive nature that doesn't have a filter

C) Molly-coddling their kids so much that when something doesn't go their way they get very overprotective/defensive

D) Anger issues

E) Too high expectations from their own parents that they're passing down onto their own kids/team

F) Coaches having far too high an opinion of themselves due to the power they have compared to the "real world"

G) Coaches having far too high an opinion of themselves because they're dead good on FM/FIFA

 

I genuinely don't know why a parent would put up with that shit. I'd be withdrawing any child I had straight out of that team and, if the poor kid still wanted to play, be finding a side which played for fun. Because surely you can play and enjoy yourself. What does it matter if the under 9's lose 9-0 every week. It's not going to psychologically damage them for eternity, is it?

Definitely A, B & F and probably C, D, E & G too!

 

At the start of this season, the coach of my lads U10's team was getting very frustrated that they were getting battered 10-0 each week. As a 'parent' then, I watched from the other side of the pitch (parents have to stand the opposite side to the coaches) and he would lay into them about how they weren't listening to him. He was shouting so much that the kids were in fear of him and the parents complained to the club manager/chairman about his behavior.

 

He had the feedback and then went on a big rant on the group WhatsApp about the fact it was all the kids fault and he wasn't their 'babysitter' and he gave all his time for free etc, etc, and then he quit. I was asked to take on the reins and reluctantly did as no-one else was prepared to. I decided to enroll on the FA Level 1 coaching course and it taught me so much about how to deal with the kids - it was a massive eye opener.

 

We continued to lose 5-0, 4-1, 3-0 but I decided that all I would do is encourage them and praise them but also set very clear boundaries about the behavior I expect from them. If they pissed around at training they'd sit out a session of start on the bench the next game - they soon started listening. I also asked them loads of questions around what they need to work/improve on and they started to create the training sessions themselves. All about 'player ownership' as the FA call it.

 

Then five weeks ago we narrowly lost 3-2 and the boys acted like they'd won. I saw their confidence grow and they didn't drop their heads. I sent a WhatsApp to all the parents saying how proud I was of them and how their behavior had improved and suddenly the parents were all on board and re-enforcing with their own kids the expected standards.

 

We got our first win last month and then drew the next one. We then won our first away match and yesterday we won away again - that's four unbeaten now. The boys are loving it and having loads of fun. They're by no means the best team in the league and they'll still lose heavily this season but it doesn't matter. They just want to play football in a safe environment where they're encouraged to express themselves and learn how to be good teammates. They now start to 'call out' poor behaviour of the opposition coaches/teams when they see it.

 

They're no angels and still have they're moments and I'm still learning and making mistakes, but it has to be about fun first at that age. When they're U13's and playing full size, 11 a side them I'm sure things will change but for the next 3 years is all about their development. If it was up to me, I'd make it compulsory that every kids coach attend the FA course. It's clear which coaches have/haven't attended it when you meet them on match days.

 

As for the parents, it's all about building relationships with them and being clear with them on what is/isn't acceptable. We have the FA 'respect' banners up during matches and I remind them beforehand what's expected. Some still overstep the mark (for all the reasons you've listed above) but I encourage them to police themselves. If the opposition coach/parents act poorly then they get a low 'respect' rating when we send in the results to the local FA. We can also report examples of poor behaviour and it gets investigated and they get fined.

 

People need to realise it's only local park kids football and not the Premier League. Parents think their kid will be the next Maddison but should maybe concentrate instead in making sure their kid is a well rounded person who behaves in the right way and respects themselves, their team mates and the opposition.

 

It's only a game...

 

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Steve_Walsh5

Steve_Walsh5

Posted
Posted

Black cab drivers, waved down a cab last night and told him my destination. He then said that will be £15, it’s not normally that price so I said put it on the metre. He refused and insisted on it being £15, I just walked off and waited for another cab. Got in it he put it on the metre and the price was £10.20. 

 

I know it’s only a fiver but surely there are some rules & regulations about things like that. 

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Crinklyfox

Crinklyfox

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

Definitely A, B & F and probably C, D, E & G too!

 

At the start of this season, the coach of my lads U10's team was getting very frustrated that they were getting battered 10-0 each week. As a 'parent' then, I watched from the other side of the pitch (parents have to stand the opposite side to the coaches) and he would lay into them about how they weren't listening to him. He was shouting so much that the kids were in fear of him and the parents complained to the club manager/chairman about his behavior.

 

He had the feedback and then went on a big rant on the group WhatsApp about the fact it was all the kids fault and he wasn't their 'babysitter' and he gave all his time for free etc, etc, and then he quit. I was asked to take on the reins and reluctantly did as no-one else was prepared to. I decided to enroll on the FA Level 1 coaching course and it taught me so much about how to deal with the kids - it was a massive eye opener.

 

We continued to lose 5-0, 4-1, 3-0 but I decided that all I would do is encourage them and praise them but also set very clear boundaries about the behavior I expect from them. If they pissed around at training they'd sit out a session of start on the bench the next game - they soon started listening. I also asked them loads of questions around what they need to work/improve on and they started to create the training sessions themselves. All about 'player ownership' as the FA call it.

 

Then five weeks ago we narrowly lost 3-2 and the boys acted like they'd won. I saw their confidence grow and they didn't drop their heads. I sent a WhatsApp to all the parents saying how proud I was of them and how their behavior had improved and suddenly the parents were all on board and re-enforcing with their own kids the expected standards.

 

We got our first win last month and then drew the next one. We then won our first away match and yesterday we won away again - that's four unbeaten now. The boys are loving it and having loads of fun. They're by no means the best team in the league and they'll still lose heavily this season but it doesn't matter. They just want to play football in a safe environment where they're encouraged to express themselves and learn how to be good teammates. They now start to 'call out' poor behaviour of the opposition coaches/teams when they see it.

 

They're no angels and still have they're moments and I'm still learning and making mistakes, but it has to be about fun first at that age. When they're U13's and playing full size, 11 a side them I'm sure things will change but for the next 3 years is all about their development. If it was up to me, I'd make it compulsory that every kids coach attend the FA course. It's clear which coaches have/haven't attended it when you meet them on match days.

 

As for the parents, it's all about building relationships with them and being clear with them on what is/isn't acceptable. We have the FA 'respect' banners up during matches and I remind them beforehand what's expected. Some still overstep the mark (for all the reasons you've listed above) but I encourage them to police themselves. If the opposition coach/parents act poorly then they get a low 'respect' rating when we send in the results to the local FA. We can also report examples of poor behaviour and it gets investigated and they get fined.

 

People need to realise it's only local park kids football and not the Premier League. Parents think their kid will be the next Maddison but should maybe concentrate instead in making sure their kid is a well rounded person who behaves in the right way and respects themselves, their team mates and the opposition.

 

It's only a game...

 

Izzy you're a coach/manager now so please be prepared for the highs and lows.  One potential scenario.....

 

The season progresses and your team continues to blossom under your tutelage.  The parents are very happy.

 

Next season is even better as the team makes a good start and consistently overachieves, mostly down to your management skills.

 

Some of the parents start to believe that the success of the team is down to their children's ability alone and wonder why they're not on Barcelona's books.

 

Mid season the team suffers some reverses.  The parents aren't happy and as their children can't possibly be culpable they blame the manager.  An 'Izzy out' faction is formed.

 

Results pick up again but it's obvious that your team aren't going to win the league so the 'Izzy out' campaign gains some momentum, particularly from those parents who have conveniently forgotten what it feels like to be beaten 10-0 by Dogpoo Juniors.  The parents who support you are labelled 'Izzy fan boys' by the 'Izzy out' parents and subjected to verbal abuse at matches.

 

The chairman is constantly pestered by the 'Izzy out' faction and to get rid of them seeks a meeting with you where you explain that the team isn't the best in the league and it's unrealistic for the parents to expect a win every match but it's like talking to a brick wall.  At the end of the season you resign, the 'Izzy out' faction celebrate and welcome the appointment of a replacement with many years experience and no great track record (because experience is more important than ability, right).  The team bombs next season and finishes bottom of the league.

 

Your son moves to the next school, you take over as the manager again and lead them to the league title.  The 'Izzy out' campaign remembers you as 'not being all that great for them'.  The other parents mourn your loss.

 

Life goes on.  Welcome to the merry-go-round.

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Izzy

Izzy

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15 minutes ago, Crinklyfox said:

Izzy you're a coach/manager now so please be prepared for the highs and lows.  One potential scenario.....

 

The season progresses and your team continues to blossom under your tutelage.  The parents are very happy.

 

Next season is even better as the team makes a good start and consistently overachieves, mostly down to your management skills.

 

Some of the parents start to believe that the success of the team is down to their children's ability alone and wonder why they're not on Barcelona's books.

 

Mid season the team suffers some reverses.  The parents aren't happy and as their children can't possibly be culpable they blame the manager.  An 'Izzy out' faction is formed.

 

Results pick up again but it's obvious that your team aren't going to win the league so the 'Izzy out' campaign gains some momentum, particularly from those parents who have conveniently forgotten what it feels like to be beaten 10-0 by Dogpoo Juniors.  The parents who support you are labelled 'Izzy fan boys' by the 'Izzy out' parents and subjected to verbal abuse at matches.

 

The chairman is constantly pestered by the 'Izzy out' faction and to get rid of them seeks a meeting with you where you explain that the team isn't the best in the league and it's unrealistic for the parents to expect a win every match but it's like talking to a brick wall.  At the end of the season you resign, the 'Izzy out' faction celebrate and welcome the appointment of a replacement with many years experience and no great track record (because experience is more important than ability, right).  The team bombs next season and finishes bottom of the league.

 

Your son moves to the next school, you take over as the manager again and lead them to the league title.  The 'Izzy out' campaign remembers you as 'not being all that great for them'.  The other parents mourn your loss.

 

Life goes on.  Welcome to the merry-go-round.

lol:appl:

 

I see it going something like this...

 

We continue to have a decent second half of the season and finish mid-table. The boys continue to enjoy it and develop, but my lad (who's a big lump with no technical ability) decides to quit at the end of the season and take up Basketball instead.

 

I resign my position as coach seeing as my lad no longer wants to play, but the "Izzy fan boy" Mums are up in arms and demand I stay on. Two of them in particular approach me and offer to have a secret threesome with me to persuade me not to go. I agree and my ultimate fantasy is realised, but then I quit anyway.

 

One of their husbands finds out and comes around my house and beats the shit out of me. I end up in hospital and when eventually discharged, my wife divorces me and throws me out of the house.

 

I end up living on the streets, my son becomes a professional Basketball player in the NBA but never speaks to me again.

 

The end...

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Max Wall

Max Wall

Posted
Posted
Just now, Carl the Llama said:

The oblivious zombie hordes that make up poundland's clientele. Just trying to navigate through the shop is nigh impossible with unchaperoned kids and gormless adults blocking your path every 2 seconds.

Where did you have to cut through Poundland to get to? Or do you shop there?

 

 

 

(Be careful, your answer may give Buce some ammo lol)

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Buce

Buce

Posted
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12 minutes ago, Max Wall said:

Where did you have to cut through Poundland to get to? Or do you shop there?

 

 

 

(Be careful, your answer may give Buce some ammo lol)

 

Well, Carl?

 

I haven’t got all day. 

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Countryfox

Countryfox

Posted
Posted
5 minutes ago, Buce said:

 

To make himself more visible to cyclists when he’s jay walking. 

 

Pretty obvious really. 

 

1 minute ago, Tuna said:

Christmas decorations probably.

 

:D

 

Well thats 3 suggestions so far ...    know which one I prefer ...    :)

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Beliall

Beliall

Posted
Posted
31 minutes ago, Countryfox said:

 

 

Well thats 3 suggestions so far ...    know which one I prefer ...    :)

When he bought the christmas tree the shop assistant said  "are you putting up yourself?" he thought that a great suggestion but now its stuck and he needs to decorate the trunk before work on Monday

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Carl the Llama

Carl the Llama

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, Countryfox said:

Well thats 3 suggestions so far ...    know which one I prefer ...    :)

You're too kind, just for you then here I am in my full regalia :thumbup: (minus the tinsel because poundland sucks):

cost_7.png

 

 

5 hours ago, Beliall said:

When he bought the christmas tree the shop assistant said  "are you putting up yourself?" he thought that a great suggestion but now its stuck and he needs to decorate the trunk before work on Monday

Weird because normally I have no issue shoving out big logs... 

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Saxondale

Saxondale

Posted
Posted
23 hours ago, Carl the Llama said:

The oblivious zombie hordes that make up poundland's clientele. Just trying to navigate through the shop is nigh impossible with unchaperoned kids and gormless adults blocking your path every 2 seconds.

This applies to every retail premises in the entire country.

In fact every public place.

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