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King Kyle lcfc

i hate the old bill (lol)

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Posted

While I was driving down the M25 the other day, (going a little faster than I should have) I passed under a bridge only to see a copper the other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The copper pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronising smirk, asked:

"Runway too short?"

To which I replied, "I'm late for work".

To which he asked, "What do you do?"

"I'm a rectum stretcher", I responded.

The copper was surprised and confused "A what? A rectum stretcher?? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"

"Well" I said, " I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in, work side to side until I get my other hand in, and then I slowly start to stretch the hole, until it's about six feet."

Then the copper asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six foot asshole?"

To which I politely replied," You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge....."

Speeding ticket: £105.00

Court costs: £45

Look on copper's face: Priceless

Posted

While I was driving down the M25 the other day, (going a little faster than I should have) I passed under a bridge only to see a copper the other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The copper pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronising smirk, asked:

"Runway too short?"

To which I replied, "I'm late for work".

To which he asked, "What do you do?"

"I'm a rectum stretcher", I responded.

The copper was surprised and confused "A what? A rectum stretcher?? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"

"Well" I said, " I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in, work side to side until I get my other hand in, and then I slowly start to stretch the hole, until it's about six feet."

Then the copper asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six foot asshole?"

To which I politely replied," You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge....."

Speeding ticket: £105.00

Court costs: £45

Look on copper's face: Priceless

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Posted

Speeding ticket: £105.00

Court costs: £45

Look on copper's face: Priceless

lollollol

PS: Not a good idea to speed on M25... speed elsewhere :P

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