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Jay

The Tufty Club Exposed!

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Posted

EDUCATIONAL FUN OR SKWERLIEN YOUTH CULT?

No review of Tufty the Traffic Safety Squirrel's villainous career would be complete without mention of the Tufty Club.

The purpose of this page isn't to re-hash the history of the Tufty Club. Suffice to say that Tufty used England's Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents (RoSPA) to set up the most efficient brainwashing machine of all time. Our intent is to show the basic items employed by Tufty and his minions to delude and/or intimidate the masses into submitting to the skwerlside.

You see the first item of interest, the Tufty Club "badge",

badge2.gif

Shown at about 2.5 times it's actual size, this seemingly innocuous button became the coveted treasure of thousands, perhaps millions of children in the latter half of the 20th century. It not only identified them as Tufty Clubbers, but as minions in the chitterbox plot for squirrel world domination. After centuries of disinterest in or hostility towards the bushytailed tree rats, the children of the British Isles suddenly, desperately wanted to be swaggering squirrels just like Tufty!

And how were the innocent offspring of supposedly responsible parents induced into joining the Tufty Club? Unbelievably, it was the parents themselves who signed their little ones up, even paying for the privilege, while swearing that they will "read the stories in the Tufty Book to this child... and teach the lessons they contain."

Patriots, we know today that the Tufty Club and its books (the Tufty Manifesto) turned way too many into dim-watt skwerlhuggers eagerly embracing the false promises of squirrel world domination. Moreover, many of the young Tufty Clubbers of yesteryear are now adult skwerlverts

So, what can be done to stop the spread of squirrel world domination? If you're already in its clutches, it's not too late to turn from the skwerlside. We encourage you to join SkwerlHuggers Anonymous to begin your bright road to recovery (see link below).

Of course, for those wanting to take a more militant approach to defeating Tufty and the bushytail horde, may we suggest joining the Anti-Squirrel Coalition (ASC)?

ascyouth.jpg

And, yes, the ASC does have youth programs guaranteed to keep the wee ones on the straight and narrow. Just click on the photo of the ASC youth group to your right to hear our enlightened and progressive approach to teaching folks about Tufty and his dastardly plans.

In any event, it's the wise parent that warns their child against the seductive lure of skwerlhuggery

as a final warning I would be very very carefull to avoid fellow posters trying to force you into joining This so called club!!!

by the way moring Jankers!!!

Posted

I am not so sure!!!

let me point you in the direction of this very informative article which is titled The Tufty Club - A manifesto of terror!!!!

Shocking Revelations!!!

how's things in Jankers world discovered anymore comedy genius that I should be made aware of??

Posted

There was a dead squirrel in Filbert Way last night after the game.

Posted
are you sure it was dead and not passed out through boredom :blink:

It looked very dead, and the tyre marks were a little suspicious. I think it was suicide.

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