Writing letters...

[JoeyB]

When writing letters to Companies asking if they have any jobs going, what do you need to put in it,

so far i have:

I am currently a student at [college] studying business, computing and visual media at A Level.

I am writing to enquire about the possibility of you doing an apprenticeship in business/retail management.

I have attached my cv and would be grateful of any further information you could send me.

i don't know what else to put?

so i was hoping that all the good people on foxestalk who are in business will know what too put and help me

cheers JoeB

[Fez of Mahrez]

In my very scant experience, it's good to keep it brief. What you've got is pretty solid, you could do with adding a short paragraph about what you want to do in the future and why you've chosen that particular company to approach, because even if it's otherwise just a standard letter that you send out, you don't want it to look like that straight away. Any positive feature that distinguishes you from other people who are after the same sort of arrangement is worth putting the extra effort in for.

[lookwhaticando]

I am currently a student at [college] studying business, computing and visual media at A Level.

I am writing to enquire about the possibility of you doing an apprenticeship in business/retail management.

I have attached my cv and would be grateful of any further information you could send me.

I have no recommendations for new material, but a few suggestions for current material.

"... you doing an apprenticeship in..."

That's worded kinda badly... it's worded almost as if you're asking the company to do the apprenticeship. You need to rework it a little in my opinion.

And surely CV should be upper-case, not lower case.

[JoeyB]

In my very scant experience, it's good to keep it brief. What you've got is pretty solid, you could do with adding a short paragraph about what you want to do in the future and why you've chosen that particular company to approach, because even if it's otherwise just a standard letter that you send out, you don't want it to look like that straight away. Any positive feature that distinguishes you from other people who are after the same sort of arrangement is worth putting the extra effort in for.

Basically im just sending it out to as many companies as i can tbh

all i want to do in the furture is be a business manager

should i put in my spare time i do a bit of football coaching, and have been asked if i will run a football team?

And am very Flexible with the hours i work?

[JoeyB]

I have no recommendations for new material, but a few suggestions for current material.

"... you doing an apprenticeship in..."

That's worded kinda badly... it's worded almost as if you're asking the company to do the apprenticeship. You need to rework it a little in my opinion.

And surely CV should be upper-case, not lower case.

Noticed that already and changed it

[Fez of Mahrez]

Basically im just sending it out to as many companies as i can tbh

all i want to do in the furture is be a business manager

should i put in my spare time i do a bit of football coaching, and have been asked if i will run a football team?

And am very Flexible with the hours i work?

So you're bothered enough to ask us but not bothered enough to do a slightly different letter to each company?

[davieG]

When writing letters to Companies asking if they have any jobs going, what do you need to put in it,

so far i have:

I am currently a student at [college] studying business, computing and visual media at A Level.

I am writing to enquire about the possibility of you doing an apprenticeship in business/retail management.

I have attached my cv and would be grateful of any further information you could send me.

i don't know what else to put?

so i was hoping that all the good people on foxestalk who are in business will know what too put and help me

cheers JoeB

Your CV should have all the info so make sure you cover the key points:

Interests & Hobbies especially if they have some relevance.

Charity work

Club memberships (not the local lap dancing one)

Achievements, Sporting & artistic, academic

Reading

In fact anything that demonstrates your ability to do the things employers are looking for e.g.

Quick to learn

Good communication skills, written & oral

Good team person

Able to work on own, using own initiative

Tidy

Leadership

Punctuality ( school/college attendance records being available is always good)

Able to complete things on time

It's good to mention these things but if you can give specific examples/evidence that will carry more weight.

If you are after a job in business/retail it would be good if you can demonstrate an interest in that, if you can slip in some information about the company you're applying too that would also be useful.

Make sure that your grammar is spot on and there are no spelling mistakes - don't just rely on the spell checker otherwise you might say couch instead of coach

Good Luck.

I wouldn't let them know you spend all your free time on here.

[JoeyB]

Your CV should have all the info so make sure you cover the key points:

Interests & Hobbies especially if they have some relevance.

Charity work

Club memberships (not the local lap dancing one)

Achievements, Sporting & artistic, academic

Reading

In fact anything that demonstrates your ability to do the things employers are looking for e.g.

Quick to learn

Good communication skills, written & oral

Good team person

Able to work on own, using own initiative

Tidy

Leadership

Punctuality ( school/college attendance records being available is always good)

Able to complete things on time

It's good to mention these things but if you can give specific examples/evidence that will carry more weight.

If you are after a job in business/retail it would be good if you can demonstrate an interest in that, if you can slip in some information about the company you're applying too that would also be useful.

Make sure that your grammar is spot on and there are no spelling mistakes - don't just rely on the spell checker otherwise you might say couch instead of coach

Good Luck.

I wouldn't let them know you spend all your free time on here.

Surely that would get me the job

I have a part time job atm so that should help, ive got people willing to give me references, boss at work, Teachers at school and people who know have known me for ages

i also have worked at Leicester for the past 2 seasons so that will show my customer realtions should be good.

so anything else i should add into the letter?

[davieG]

Surely that would get me the job

I have a part time job atm so that should help, ive got people willing to give me references, boss at work, Teachers at school and people who know have known me for ages

i also have worked at Leicester for the past 2 seasons so that will show my customer realtions should be good.

so anything else i should add into the letter?

On the letter itself something along the lines of 'I would welcome the chance to discuss with you any opportunities you have that may be appropriate"

I'm sure you could construct something better, what you should be after is getting your foot in the door sending you information would follow naturally if they invited you in for a chat.

Mind you, when it comes to recruitment most organisations are bogged down with procedures and political correctness that you'll either hear absolutely sod all, get a note saying they've made a note of your interest or a 40 page application form to fill in .

I usually get sod all or a card saying Sorry Grandad no vacancies at this cool company.

[JoeyB]

do GCSE grades need to go into the letter?

my letter now stands at:

I am currently a student at [college] studying business, computing and visual media at A Level.

I am writing to enquire about the possibility of doing an apprenticeship in business/retail management with your company. If not I would welcome an opportunity to come and talk to about what other similar options your company may offer.

During my free time I help coach my local football team, and have been asked to run a team next year.

I have attached my CV and would be grateful of any further information you could send me about apprenticeships at your company.

dont need that last bit

[davieG]

do GCSE grades need to go into the letter?

my letter now stands at:

I am currently a student at [college] studying business, computing and visual media at A Level.

I am writing to enquire about the possibility of doing an apprenticeship in business/retail management with your company. If not I and would welcome an opportunity to come and talk to about this or what other similar options your company may offer.

During my free time I help coach my local football team, and have been asked to run a team next year. You shouldn't need this in the letter it should be in your CV.

I have attached my CV, and would be grateful of any further information you could send me about apprenticeships at your company. if you require any additional information I would be pleased to provide it.

dont need that last bit

[Hullfox]

Try not to start more than the first paragraph with the word "I"

[davieG]

Try not to start more than the first paragraph with the word "I"

[Jon the Hat]

Why you are writing

When you finish your studies and what they are

What you want to do career wise and why - try to link with experience.

What you can offer the employer - put your examples of part time job, football coaching etc in here to back up you reasons.

Why does this particular company interest you

Blurb about Cv attached and look forward to the opportunity to discuss any opportunities they may have

Keep it brief and sentence for each of the above. And lay it out clearly. Use decent paper.

[Brainy]

W I L F

What i'm looking for, or in your case, you.

[JoeyB]

W I L F

What i'm looking for, or in your case, you.

Take it your looking for the same stuff then

whers andy when ya need him? Andy if ya online get ya ass on msn plz m8y

[davieG]

And if all that advice fails post them a shit parcel.

[JoeyB]

And if all that advice fails post them a shit parcel.

Imagine there face when they open up, nice smelly turd

[JoeyB]

done my letters but dont know which is better:

1) I am currently a student at College studying business, computing and visual media at A Level.

I am writing to enquire about the possibility of doing an apprenticeship in business/retail management with your company. If not I would welcome an opportunity to come and talk to about what other similar options your company may offer.

During my free time I help coach my local football team, and have been asked to run a team next year.

I have attached my CV and would be grateful of any further information you could send me about apprenticeships at your company.

2)

Dear Sir/ Madam

I am writing to enquire about the possibility of doing an apprenticeship in business/retail management with your company. If not I would welcome an opportunity to come and talk to about what other similar options your company may offer.

I am currently a student at College studying business, computing and visual media at A Level, During my free time I help coach my local football team, and have been asked to run a team next year.

I have attached my CV and would be grateful of any further information you could send me about apprenticeships at your company.

so which is better ?

[Jon the Hat]

done my letters but dont know which is better:

1) I am currently a student at College studying business, computing and visual media at A Level.

I am writing to enquire about the possibility of doing an apprenticeship in business/retail management with your company. If not I would welcome an opportunity to come and talk to about what other similar options your company may offer.

During my free time I help coach my local football team, and have been asked to run a team next year.

I have attached my CV and would be grateful of any further information you could send me about apprenticeships at your company.

2)

Dear Sir/ Madam

I am writing to enquire about the possibility of doing an apprenticeship in business/retail management with your company. If not I would welcome an opportunity to come and talk to about what other similar options your company may offer.

I am currently a student at College studying business, computing and visual media at A Level, During my free time I help coach my local football team, and have been asked to run a team next year.

I have attached my CV and would be grateful of any further information you could send me about apprenticeships at your company.

so which is better ?

Don't put "if not", sounds too negative.

[Floating Fox]

Take it your looking for the same stuff then

whers andy when ya need him? Andy if ya online get ya ass on msn plz m8y

Why me

[lcfc_jme]

Why me

Personal Assistant to JoeB now? Oh how the mighty have fallen!! :laugh:

[JoeyB]

Why me

BaTracer tactics

[davieG]

Don't put "if not", sounds too negative.

I agree just put a comma after company and drop the If not. You also don't need 'what' as in what other similar ........

I still don't think you need to mention the football team involvement that should be in your CV. Why have you singled that out, it's not as if you're applying to be the Manager of LCFC?

Apart from that I prefer the 2nd one because it say's right up front what you are after.

[Brainy]

How many companies has Davie spoken to? He seems to know a lot