Miquel The Work Geordie

Its what Zeus wouldve wanted god bless him

Your Latvias, your Lithuanias – they have to bring weird shit to the table like Estonia did – you bring Evan Davies singing a heartfelt Radio One drivetime ballad and you aint doing nothing lads!

This guy is so bald I'm keeping an eye out for the Lion quality stamp of approval on his head

Get in the bin if that touches the top 5, I like my music loud (er hello - Ed Sheeran fan over here!) but that was too much

Pro Evo Grimes

That was class, gonna be a Finland 23 esque robbery when some other jabroni wins it

Nothing makes my skin churn more than Eurovision rapping, and I once worked with someone who signed off emails with "carpe diem"

Bloody hell why do these lot insist on reinacting Emmanuel films every time they enter this? You eat your tea at 10pm every night and you turn into a nation of sex crazed perverts

This is Susan man

GIYIT SPAIN

Bloody hell who are these pair

Anyone remember 2022's entry? Might be the horniest we as a nation has ever been.

What a lovely woman, have a good night babe x

When you watch these old Eurovision clips you do realise how much the contest has progressed, its like watching football before highlights from the backpass rule was implemented

The host on the right has a jawline harder than a stint behind bars but good Christ she's fantastic.

Look at the hand placement there - naughty enough for early 00s Eurovision audience but no doubt in the woke 2020s he'd have a workplace tribunal on his hands!

Your mans am dram performance of his Star Wars musical is going well

Who i sour entry tonight? We bringing back Daz Samspon, that 40 year old from Stockport who did a rap about school? Because if we haven't then we aren't winning I'm afraid!

Fair play to Israel she's playing the match and not the occasion here

I'm so disappointed here, pathetic from Luxembourg. Just a small town in Belgium imo

Luxembourg's VT had me thinking she was gonna be Miquel elite tier whispy singer songwriter and she comes out gyrating on greased up dancers! This isn't why I pay the licence fee and if I had young kids in the house they'd be banished to the garden! Mary Whitehouse didn't die for this!