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Knighton Matt

Who'd win in a fight?

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Posted

:santa: vs :pirate:

People reckon Santa is a big soft bas tard but I reckon he packs a fair punch plus he's got a huge sack. The pirate obviously has fighting experience in abundance but the patch might restrict the view and an abundance of rum my harm his natural rhythm.

I give up I'm flummoxed. :dunno:

Posted

:santa: vs :pirate:

People reckon Santa is a big soft bas tard but I reckon he packs a fair punch plus he's got a huge sack. The pirate obviously has fighting experience in abundance but the patch might restrict the view and an abundance of rum my harm his natural rhythm.

I give up I'm flummoxed. :dunno:

Summat you ain't tellling us Matt?

Posted

:santa: vs :pirate:

People reckon Santa is a big soft bas tard but I reckon he packs a fair punch plus he's got a huge sack. The pirate obviously has fighting experience in abundance but the patch might restrict the view and an abundance of rum my harm his natural rhythm.

I give up I'm flummoxed. :dunno:

Isn't Santa resting right now? To be ready for Christmas?

Posted

He was resting.. which was why the pirates thought it was the ideal opportunity to attack.

Quite the opposite. He's in training Rocky Balboa style :thumbup:

That too. It's like the cold war! A war of misinformation!!

Posted

Those elves had been manufacturing, wrapping and then supplying arms to the pirates.

In Santa's BEST wrapping paper too!

Oh dear... what a disaster!!!

Posted

Get this...

You know Rudolph?

Rudolph...

You know the red nosed reindeer?

Turns out it was all a hoax. Paint.

Santa was basically disarmed when this came out. Disarmed and dispirited.

Posted

Get this...

You know Rudolph?

Rudolph...

You know the red nosed reindeer?

Turns out it was all a hoax. Paint.

Santa was basically disarmed when this came out. Disarmed and dispirited.

The whole Rudolph was just a paint?

Or just the nose? :P

Posted

Just the nose.

But Rudolph, as it turns out was less of a reindeer and more of a camel.

It's all by the by now anyway as all the reindeer are dead.

Ohhh a camel that can survive polar temperatures? Wow!

Posted

If there are any children reading, Santa does exist. All the reindeer are alive and well, especially Rudolph who's nose is looking redder than ever this year.

Porn, drugs, unprotected sex, binge drinking and skipping lessons are all bad ideas. An apple a day keeps the doctor a way.

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