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General Smuts

I've become a stereotype.

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Posted
Haha what you hiding from Stez for?

PS last nights shenanigans you definitely are a stereotype dude.

Was it the hat or the copious amounts of strongbow?

Posted
Oh god yeah, I remember that. Were we walking behind you or something? What game was that again?

Colchester.

He still hasn't apologised properly.

Posted

Ladies and Gentlemen, sit down as im about to tell you all a story, A story about David Ginola's love child and his love for alcoholic apple flavoured beverages. Its a cautionary tale about living life to excess and being a student alcoholic.

Let me tell you about a phonecall i recieved last night from a young Leicester City left back. We'll call him Moe Jattock.

Let me set the scene. I'd been drinking since 12 o'clock that afternoon and continued as most of you saw to rip through the strongbow whilst at the kuran game. I left the game to go to a party at my house straight after. I kept drinking.

Then things got a little weird. I had a call from one of the girls that were with Jattock and Honey Jayes and she put Jattock on the phone. In my tiny little pissed up strongbow drowed brain this meant that i was on the phone with Stitch Hard Rearman so i preceded to badger poor Jattock with questions about Rearmans missus who i used to go to school with to see if it really was him. Obviously Jattock hadn't the faintest clue what i was jabbering on about but bless him soldiered on with the call regardless and was ridiculously polite about it. He finally passed the phone back with me still not believing it was Rearman/Jattock and not having a clue what was happening so i carried on drinking.

Now thinking about it in the cold light of day i've missed a golden oppurtunity here. Moe Jattock has clearly seen the Sapplezilla in the showers - all my wildest dreams could have been hightened by a simple question to Jattock and i was too pissed to think to ask! I hate myself!

So there you go kiddies. Don't drink cider - cos if you're golden opportunity to fund out how massive your idols willy is arises and your too pissed to capatalise on it, you'll never forgive yourself.

Lots of Love and Kisses

The End.

NB: All names have been altered to protect those involved.

Posted

I just walked home from a mates bbq drinking a can of strongbow and wearing the same clothes from the Quorn game.

Is anyone going to be in town at all tonight? It's my cousins 18th birthday and i need a drinking partner till his lot turn up. I will buy you a pint.

Posted
Was it the hat or the copious amounts of strongbow?

A bit of both really

Colchester.

He still hasn't apologised properly.

Oh yes, he won't have apologised for dragging you away from Quorn early either yet then.

Posted
Oh yes, he won't have apologised for dragging you away from Quorn early either yet then.

That's because there is nothing to apologise for.

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