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Knighton Matt

Envious women

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Posted

I attracted a lot of envy from women this weekend. The reason... (nope sadly not my boyish good looks :nono: )

Because I could stand up and relieve myself happily on a nearby fence or wall (Morrissey's face on a poster made great target practice on one particular occasion) whereas they had to queue for 20 mins or lose all their dignity.

But seriously let's chew the fat...Did God make us this way to give men bragging rights?

On an interesting side note there was nearly a horrendous accident involving the act mentioned above, a stinging nettle, and a freak gust of wind. Seriously could you imagine?! :cry:

Posted

I attracted a lot of envy from women this weekend. The reason... (nope sadly not my boyish good looks :nono: )

Because I could stand up and relieve myself happily on a nearby fence or wall (Morrissey's face on a poster made great target practice on one particular occasion) whereas they had to queue for 20 mins or lose all their dignity.

But seriously let's chew the fat...Did God make us this way to give men bragging rights?

On an interesting side note there was nearly a horrendous accident involving the act mentioned above, a stinging nettle, and a freak gust of wind. Seriously could you imagine?! :cry:

:D:D:D

Serves you right!

Posted

On an interesting side note there was nearly a horrendous accident involving the act mentioned above, a stinging nettle, and a freak gust of wind. Seriously could you imagine?! :cry:

at least there was no electric fence :ph34r:

Posted

I attracted a lot of envy from women this weekend. The reason... (nope sadly not my boyish good looks :nono: )

Because I could stand up and relieve myself happily on a nearby fence or wall (Morrissey's face on a poster made great target practice on one particular occasion) whereas they had to queue for 20 mins or lose all their dignity.

But seriously let's chew the fat...Did God make us this way to give men bragging rights?

On an interesting side note there was nearly a horrendous accident involving the act mentioned above, a stinging nettle, and a freak gust of wind. Seriously could you imagine?! :cry:

Penis Envy :sweating::smile::thumbup:

Posted

Have you hosted a private meeting between your testicals and a live electric fence? :ph34r:

Just you seem so sure it's worse than a nettle. :sweating:

I reckon my 'rough and ready' love orbs could have taken the nettle sting or the electric fence. It was my delicate exposed helmet I was worried about.

p.s. Sorry for taking the tone positively underground. :unsure:

Posted

I reckon my 'rough and ready' love orbs could have taken the nettle sting or the electric fence. It was my delicate exposed helmet I was worried about.

p.s. Sorry for taking the tone positively underground. :unsure:

It's all good...

My question was actually aimed at Collymore - the 'leccy fence expert. :P

Posted

at least there was no electric fence :ph34r:

I'm guessing you're talking about V festival here, well, seeing as you're so into collymore you might like to know that...I MET THE MAN HIMSELF yesterday haha. I showed him my city shirt and he smiled.

Posted
I attracted a lot of envy from women this weekend. The reason... (nope sadly not my boyish good looks :nono: )

Because I could stand up and relieve myself happily on a nearby fence or wall (Morrissey's face on a poster made great target practice on one particular occasion) whereas they had to queue for 20 mins or lose all their dignity.

But seriously let's chew the fat...Did God make us this way to give men bragging rights?

On an interesting side note there was nearly a horrendous accident involving the act mentioned above, a stinging nettle, and a freak gust of wind. Seriously could you imagine?! :cry:

A mate of mine got stung by a bee on the end of foreskin and had to undergo circumcision embarrasing for anyone but when you're 18 and all the nurses come to have a look :blush: , then there was the shave they gave, many a laugh was had from that incident. lollol

Posted

A mate of mine got stung by a bee on the end of foreskin and had to undergo circumcision embarrasing for anyone but when you're 18 and all the nurses come to have a look :blush: , then there was the shave they gave, many a laugh was had from that incident. lollol

Embarrasing??? Just going off for a broswe on the net :whistle:

Posted

Embarrasing??? Just going off for a broswe on the net :whistle:

Embarrassing - can you imagine what it looked like, big? massive but not in a functional way ;)

Posted

Embarrassing - can you imagine what it looked like, big? massive but not in a functional way ;)

Yeah it's annoying when it becomes too big to use properly :whistle:

Posted

I attracted a lot of envy from women this weekend. The reason... (nope sadly not my boyish good looks :nono: )

Because I could stand up and relieve myself happily on a nearby fence or wall (Morrissey's face on a poster made great target practice on one particular occasion) whereas they had to queue for 20 mins or lose all their dignity.

But seriously let's chew the fat...Did God make us this way to give men bragging rights?

On an interesting side note there was nearly a horrendous accident involving the act mentioned above, a stinging nettle, and a freak gust of wind. Seriously could you imagine?! :cry:

That'll teach you to look before you untie it and have a pee! :whistle:

Posted

Because I could stand up and relieve myself happily on a nearby fence or wall (Morrissey's face on a poster made great target practice on one particular occasion) whereas they had to queue for 20 mins or lose all their dignity.

But seriously let's chew the fat...Did God make us this way to give men bragging rights?

I don't think men look too dignified relieving themselves in public either! :P

Posted

I don't think men look too dignified relieving themselves in public either! :P

More dignified than a great big wet patch on the front of their trousers surely?

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