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kerryh

Internet Dating!

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Posted

My younger brother started dating a girl he met online and it was hilarious. She sent pics, was pretty alright and came down and we even all went out one night. She then invited him to hers which I think was in Luton or something so he went and he called me in hysterics that this 22yo girl (he was about her age) had 3 kids of which she forgot to tell him about from three different dads and colours. Now there is nothing wrong with girls having kids but she could have been truthful or the fact that she had some and that her job was a lap dancer FFS!! He left sharpish and hasnt been back since!!

Posted

My younger brother started dating a girl he met online and it was hilarious. She sent pics, was pretty alright and came down and we even all went out one night. She then invited him to hers which I think was in Luton or something so he went and he called me in hysterics that this 22yo girl (he was about her age) had 3 kids of which she forgot to tell him about from three different dads and colours. Now there is nothing wrong with girls having kids but she could have been truthful or the fact that she had some and that her job was a lap dancer FFS!! He left sharpish and hasnt been back since!!

She sounds like a top classy bird to me, I’ve always wanted to date a lap dancer! Can’t be believe he would turn her down like that

Posted

My younger brother started dating a girl he met online and it was hilarious. She sent pics, was pretty alright and came down and we even all went out one night. She then invited him to hers which I think was in Luton or something so he went and he called me in hysterics that this 22yo girl (he was about her age) had 3 kids of which she forgot to tell him about from three different dads and colours. Now there is nothing wrong with girls having kids but she could have been truthful or the fact that she had some and that her job was a lap dancer FFS!! He left sharpish and hasnt been back since!!

That's just daft.

She clearly didn't even test the waters properly before inviting him round... so he was shocked and ran a mile faster than you've ever seen anyone run before.

She got her strategy all wrong... she was hoping she's just find, almost by accident, someone who loves lap dancers with multiple kids. She should really have approached it differently.

I hope your brother wasn't too badly scarred by the incident. :ermm:;)

Mind you... he could always tell himself it could have been worse... 'she' could have been a male escort for a living. lol

Guest seanfox778
Posted

just remember kerryh that if you do decide to meet someone make sure its in a public place with

lots of people and make a friend ring you during the date to make sure your ok.

Posted

just remember kerryh that if you do decide to meet someone make sure its in a public place with

lots of people and make a friend ring you during the date to make sure your ok.

She could just call you...

av-1100.jpg

:Plol;)

Posted

I got this one last night!!!

146T.jpg

hi am georgina and seperated woman as u but i want to know if we can friends so that can get u a ma brother who wants to remarry so tell me if u are interested tell me, he is in Ghana at the mopment but will soon be back, if u want i can give u his number, thanks

Oh my!

lollollol

Hey, you could start a little side line in 'convenience weddings'

Guest seanfox778
Posted

She could just call you...

av-1100.jpg

:Plol;)

:D

Posted

I remember a mate of mine meeting this bird he met on faceparty.

He took one look at her, told her she didn't fit her profile and scarpered :blink:

He'd travelled all the way to just outside Manchester from Cardiff for the meet :cry:

Posted

I remember a mate of mine meeting this bird he met on faceparty.

He took one look at her, told her she didn't fit her profile and scarpered :blink:

He'd travelled all the way to just outside Manchester from Cardiff for the meat :cry:

lol

Beef comes to mind for some reason... :whistle:

Posted

I remember a mate of mine meeting this bird he met on faceparty.

He took one look at her, told her she didn't fit her profile and scarpered :blink:

He'd travelled all the way to just outside Manchester from Cardiff for the meet :cry:

Never believe anything people say or put in their profiles...

That is the only way to avoid such disappointments.

Having said that, one of my clients (an American lady) met her British husband on the internet. Forgot to ask on what site exactly...

Posted

Never believe anything people say or put in their profiles...

That is the only way to avoid such disappointments.

Having said that, one of my clients (an American lady) met her British husband on the internet. Forgot to ask on what site exactly...

I have a confession, cisono.

I'm actually a fat balding 73 year old... I have just five of my own teeth remaining, the rest were dissolved after years of consuming way too much sugar in my diet.

I hope this doesn't change things.

Though, while I think about it... I'm not convinced your profile is entirely truthful either. :whistle:

Lying about your age is terrible. We cannot continue this thing if you're really 2 and a half years old. That's a bit young even by my standards. :ph34r:

Posted

I have a confession, cisono.

I'm actually a fat balding 73 year old... I have just five of my own teeth remaining, the rest were dissolved after years of consuming way too much sugar in my diet.

I hope this doesn't change things.

Though, while I think about it... I'm not convinced your profile is entirely truthful either. :whistle:

Lying about your age is terrible. We cannot continue this thing if you're really 2 and a half years old. That's a bit young even by my standards. :ph34r:

lol

Indeed we cannot, particularly if you really are 73 years of age!

Lying about age is commonplace, even men do that (it seems!)

But why did you ever lie about your teeth?!?!? :P

Posted

lol

Indeed we cannot, particularly if you really are 73 years of age!

Lying about age is commonplace, even men do that (it seems!)

But why did you ever lie about your teeth?!?!? :P

I didn't want you to think of me as a toothless wonder. :ph34r:

Posted

I'm actually a fat balding 73 year old... I have just five of my own teeth remaining, the rest were dissolved after years of consuming way too much sugar in my diet.

Oops. I had missed the fat bit.

That really DOES change things, I'm afraid :blink::ph34r::whistle::P

Posted

This 55-year-old lady I know met her 35-year-old husband on a dating site (a good catch, apparently!)

She did have to wade through several unpleasant prospects first though...

Posted

I'll date you Kerry.

But I'd have to chop you in half and count the rings.

EDIT: That's a tree joke, for anyone who's worried.

I sense some inconsistency there...

You WILL or you WOULD?

:ph34r::whistle::P

Posted

I'll date you Kerry.

But I'd have to chop you in half and count the rings.

EDIT: That's a tree joke, for anyone who's worried.

I really am 35 honest and I have my own picture up on the site!

But I never date men without pictures - you just never know!

Posted

I really am 35 honest and I have my own picture up on the site!

But I never date men without pictures - you just never know!

What if... they did put their own picture up but...

of when they were 10 years younger and 10 stones lighter? :P

You just NEVER KNOW anyway... :whistle:

Posted

Sorry if this has been done before.

Thought it would be worth posting it here, in case someone needed reminding.... :P

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS

40-ish................................49.

Adventurous..................... Slept with everyone.

Athletic.............................No breasts.

Average looking............................ Moooo.

Beautiful........................... Pathological liar.

Emotionally Secure............On medication.

Feminist............................ Fat.

Free Spirit............................Junkie.

Friendship first...................Former Slut.

New-Age........................... Body hair in the wrong places.

Old-fashioned.................... No B. J.'s

Open -minded.................... Desperate.

Outgoing........................... Loud and embarrassing.

Professional......................Bitch.

Voluptuous.......................Very fat.

Large frame........................... Hugely fat.

Wants soul mate..................... Stalker .

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S ENGLISH:

Yes.....................................No

No......................................Yes

Maybe...............................No

We need............................ I want

I am sorry............................. You'll be sorry

We need to talk...................... You're in trouble

Sure, go ahead........................ You better not

Do what you want...................You will pay for this later

I am not upset........................ Of course, I am upset, you moron!

You're attentive tonight............ Is sex all you ever think about?

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING MEN'S ENGLISH:

I am hungry........................... I am hungry

I am sleepy............................ I am sleepy

I am tired.............................. I am tired

Nice dress.............................. Nice cleavage!

I love you.............................. Let' s have sex now

I am bored................... .......... Do you want to have sex?

May I have this dance?.................. I'd like to have sex with you.

Can I call you sometime?.............. I'd like to have sex with you.

Do you want to go to a movie?......I'd like to have sex with you.

Can I take you out to dinner?........ I'd like to have sex with you.

I don't think those shoes go with that outfit.............. I'm gay.

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