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Daggers

Fishing

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Posted

not sure but Paul Merton used to say it quite a lot on HIGNFY :D

I stopped watching that when he became less funny than Ian Hislop. Still a reasonable watch I guess but I always forget it's on.

Posted

There's a specific catfish of the amazon that swims up your urine stream. Once in the barbs on its gills prevent it from retreating. The inevitable consequence of getting one up your member makes me all a shudder.

Posted

There's a specific catfish of the amazon that swims up your urine stream. Once in the barbs on its gills prevent it from retreating. The inevitable consequence of getting one up your member makes me all a shudder.

yes i've heard that .

why don't the locals just take the precaution of not pissing into the river ?

there's also a type of fish that lives in a tree

Posted

yes i've heard that .

why don't the locals just take the precaution of not pissing into the river ?

there's also a type of fish that lives in a tree

in answer to your both questions - yes, the locals piss in the trees

edit i realise there was one one question and a statement - time to get more drinks on me, starting to sober up! :ph34r:

Posted

There's a specific catfish of the amazon that swims up your urine stream. Once in the barbs on its gills prevent it from retreating. The inevitable consequence of getting one up your member makes me all a shudder.

I remember a programme where Lenny Henry was camping in the Amazon, he had to piss through a tea strainer because of that.

Posted

I remember a programme where Lenny Henry was camping in the Amazon, he had to piss through a tea strainer because of that.

I think they must use that feckin tea strainer in our works canteen , it always tastes like piss

Posted

There's a specific catfish of the amazon that swims up your urine stream. Once in the barbs on its gills prevent it from retreating. The inevitable consequence of getting one up your member makes me all a shudder.

Being all skin and ball bag, I can tie a knot with my foreskin, so i`d be ok.

Are these fish the reason the Nazi`s did a runner to South America? to stop the foreskinless Jews from following them?

Personally, I believe that this so called Urine fish was a myth started by MOSSAD, with the aim of concentrating stray Commandants into one corner of the world for easy elimination.

Posted

That's only 4" - I've had bigger than that up my arse.

It's the ones the size of a man I don't fancy being penetrated or eaten by.

Suppose it's better than a human penetrating a fish. I'm sure there are lonely fishermen who've gone that far. :ph34r:

Posted

Suppose it's better than a human penetrating a fish. I'm sure there are lonely fishermen who've gone that far. :ph34r:

I’ve shagged a few old trouts in my time

Posted

I was molested by a Ray when I was 5, he got 4 years....

A few years behind barbs will do him good , it's the only plaice for him.

We shouldn't spare the rod on that sort , we've too soft these dace

Posted

Maybe a lick o’the cat would do him good , or better still a kick in the pollocks

You do realise daggers will be annoyed with us for turning his thread into a carp

pun fest ? :D

Posted

Maybe a lick o’the cat would do him good , or better still a kick in the pollocks

You do realise daggers will be annoyed with us for turning his thread into a carp

pun fest ? :D

He`ll winkle us out and krill us all.... :frantics:

Posted

He`ll winkle us out and krill us all.... :frantics:

don't worry

If he comes back pretend we were talking about football ok .

Who do you think was better Steve Guppy or Geoff Salmons ?

Posted

I`v just had a PM from Webbo....

"You have exceeded your quota of fish gags for the day."

EEC statute 8642553/254/2.

____________________________

Fookin Spaniards, nicking our jokes.... :(

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