Stopharage

Souttar. Admittedly he had the advantage of not playing with the sorry bunch we send out each week.

Yeah, I agree. He’d have more chance flogging cauliflowers than being a footballer.

I wonder if he'll be the anti-Samson - cut his hair and he actually becomes capable of defending.

Well, unlike some of you on here, I’m really looking forward to this game. On current form, I’m fairly sure Wout Faes will outdo himself and score a hat-trick of own goals against Liverpool. Whilst blaming Filbert the Fox.

Is there a parallel universe where Daka is a striker?

I think those 11 in blue on the grass are called football players.

Surely the dopey sods watching this guff have got to leave the stadium after this opening 10 minutes.

I’ve seen jellyfish with more spine than this rabble.

Drop their dog off and get a brew?

Amorim must really be regretting not keeping Ruud on his coaching staff.

Good-o. Faes and Zirkzee having an argument over who has the most stupid haircut. That's peak entertainment at the KP.

Why on earth am I still watching this drivel?

Even the Zambian lads on Facebook are saying Daka is dreadful.

Surely no sane adult can still be fighting Daka's corner? I don't think I've ever seen a game where he hasn't air kicked or fallen over. He's like Bambi on ice.