Stopharage

Going to be a better pair at the KP than Lucy Pinder.

Glaringly obvious that we need a decent CF and I'd like us to get a nasty CDM to give us a bit of bite and leadership. Otchere with a fortunate goal and not much else.

If they win, immediately go into administration. Offer them a penny in the pound. Just forget about all of other ramifications. We’re nothing but petty.

His Chinese cousin Fan Dab is a much better option

Wout with a defensive masterclass providing an assist for Bristol’s goal.

Who’s next? Rupert Lowe as Community Integration Officer?

Let’s hope the comparisons end there.

Danny Ward…

THE DAY LEFT HE FINALLY FOXES. What?!?

Stop bleating on about the appointment and get behind Russell Martin. I mean, the guy gave us Livin’ La Vida Loca, what’s not to like?

Not sure what you lot are moaning about. Sounds like this guy just got his weekend’s back. Garden centres and visiting elderly relatives, here we go.

You can imagine Top and Rudkin discussing how they can take the heat off themselves at home games. Solution: Recruit Russell Martin Profit.

Was it the EFL, with plastic gloves and Vaseline?

LCFC social media team about to tweet today the game ended 8-7 to Leicester with Top scoring a double hat-trick.

I know you think you’ve hit rock bottom with this club but I’ve got some terrible news to tell you about the Chuckle Brothers. Barry died 8 years ago. Knowing Rudkin’s business acumen, that doesn’t necessarily rule Barry out of a place on your revolutionary management quartet.

I’ve heard that they’re going to rush Russell Martin’s appointment to today, primarily so they can use his missus in the next grovelling social media announcement.

So much diss going on there, it reads like something Kendrick Lamarr would send Drake’s way.

Sounds like my postman. Unlike Daka he can finish a one-on-one.

I’ve heard he’s got beef with the main guy at Lorus - Dave Capulet. No chance this album sees the light of day.

When the club says they’re facing an All Stars team are they referring to the way we describe them, i.e. Jordan f*****g Ayew Patson f*****g Daka Luke ‘I can throw better than i can f*****g kick’ Thomas

Think the reason for the delay in naming the new manager, is he’s got to finish the season off at Bournemouth first.

Judging by the decision-making skills of the upper management, I'm guessing they'll plump for John Terry.

Old Dick Shredder sounds right up our street, from a fans’ POV. But again, just highlights the complete madness of the idiots in charge. We bounce from manager to manager, with seemingly little thought if they’re stylistically similar or if we actually have the players for their preferred system. Maresca to Cooper to Cifuentes to Rowett shows an absolute lack of common sense by the chumps who run the club.

He's already playing for a Top club. Unfortunately nominative determinism doesn't work in this case.

TBF to the kid he’s seen the chance of a contract at a better team, so I hope he does well with Newport.