Vowels

Needs to change his first name to Billy I reckon. It worked briefly for Billy Gilmour. He was never making it as Will Gilmour. Tell me I’m wrong ( don’t, because then you’d be wrong )

XC90. Talk to me Tommo ( sorry don’t know your nickname - please enlighten us in the nickname thread - if you don’t have one I recommend ‘popeye’ )

I like the punctuation as well as the randomly selected letters that make up your username. In short, colour me impressed

The ancient Egyptians didn’t appear to use punctuation at all and they seemed to know what they were doing (?)

Too much cholesterol mate; not good for the old tikka/ticker ( I like to explain my jokes)

Oliver Skipp contains both porkpies and unfortunately slipover and sloppier too. You’re welcome.

At least Puel contains all the letters of EPL which is where we want to be. Steve Cooper contains all the letters of creosote. There’s a joke in there about rather watching creosote dry than watching us play under him but I won’t make it as I promised myself I’d at least try to be a better person.

Chicken tikka takka for me and she’ll have a kirma korma please boss.

I think Mr the Hat knew exactly what he was doing there. It’s shameful really but you have to admire the chutzpah.

Believe he would have been playing back up to Benson with the premier league hair and league 2 feet. He’s always injured though so would have got game time. Alves also injury prone ( when chomped ) so yeah I really have no helpful comment to make.

Ruuuuuuuuud Gullit. It’s time.

Yeah. This !

The Bournemouth fan in the local has no opinion on football other than that the Brighton fan in the pub is boring. Same in vice versa. The Brighton fan at least relentlessly abuses the palace fan who is a *****. What I’m getting at in a roundabout way is that Bournemouth and everything about them is boring and they won’t even beat us in an exciting way. Just an efficient 2 nilling. Military missionary. Never in doubt but not much fun. I wonder whatever became of Tony Dorigo ?

Wasted youth is better by far than a wise and productive old age. And a manager who knows what he’s doing is better than a big name or a sharp suit or whatever. Cooper is neither anyway. This isn’t even worthy of discussion. He should never have been appointed. Absolute madness. He must have really wanted it and that swayed the board. Tequila !

When you’ve seen and heard it all; feeling shat on, Croston Fox emerges and seizes the baton, Is it Alcohol, drugs, world-weary confusion ? He lunges and grasps! A most bizarre conclusion! We’ve all been there; we’ve all felt the pain, Yet don’t surrender our keyboards, we’ll do it again. Hide our best players, let’s move the kop, Why won’t Engelbert buy us from Top? Kinder surprise thread, that odd tinder thread, what’s the next beauty in cropston’s head?

It’s like when you’re a kid and highlighters are fun and then later in life you realise they are just sh1t pens taking up too much space that smudge everything and just give the illusion of being productive ( them and you ). Once the allure of the fancy colour wears off, you see what’s really there. Or what’s really not there.

I call one of our mates consonants as his surname is entirely consonants ( I know. I’m a hoot at parties ). Over the years this has evolved a number of times so it now has several branches but my favourite is that he’s known as ‘pisspants’ or ‘puddles’ because a drunk woman in the local once misheard the nickname as ‘incontinent’. Another friend has always been known as ‘Sickers’ or ‘Sycamore’. We have no idea why. Neither does he. It might be he’s embarrassed by it but he claims not to know and so I like to imagine it involves him being sick somewhere ridiculous. Perhaps during a christening.

Sometimes you have to be the wind and sometimes you have to be the tree.

Good news everybody ! Like that fella from futurama

Where do you stand on the little sausages ?

It’s the great beans/spaghetti debate over and over and over and over ( like a primate with a little pair of pan lids )

I am and I think many are. In terms of live football I tend to watch non-league; which is better but you still find a lot of the top level behaviours and negative aspects filtering down and creeping in. Beer though.

I’ve spoken to my friend from Wellington ( he says no offence by the way) and he says he prefers blackjacks

Not better mate; maybe just ‘more equal’ ? Where’s the wink emoji ?

This is just like the Willis/carey/coatsworth debate. The answer is and always has been ‘ all three’