Two pieces of black tarmac are standing in the pub having a pint one of them turns to the other one and says:
" i'm well 'ard i am. I'm from that road down the way, I get loads of cars going over me every day! I'm well 'ard!"
The other one replies:
" you think thats hard? I'm from the motorway.. i get thousands of cars AND lorrys going over me every hour! It's me whos well 'ard!!"
The other one looks pretty impressed and replies:
" wow, yeah, thats pretty hard.." They both nod and sup their pints.
shortly after this the doors of the pub burst open and standing in the doorway is a piece of green tarmac. The two pieces of black tarmac take one look at him and dive behind the table. The green tarmac comes in, giving it large and struts his way to the bar, pays for a beer, necks it in one and slams the empty glass on the bar. He takes a look around the pub and struts his way out of the door. Only when he's gone do the two pieces of black tarmac come out from behind the table still shaking.
The barman looks at them and says:
" Whats the matter with you pair? whats with the green tarmac?"
'Well' says one of them.. 'You dont want to mess with him... he's a cycle path, he is!!!!'
