Congratulations Oz..
I'm sure many are thinking it but probably afraid to ask, but is it common in same sex marriages, women in particular, for there to be a clear difference between a masculine and feminine partner? In your photo, for instance, how did they decide on who was wearing a whistle and who would wear the frock? Is it typical of their relationship, for example?
I have limited knowledge of lesbians other than I used to work with one years ago that looked like Phil Gee. Her partner was very feminine too.