I would rather.........

[Guest Bilo]

I would rather BLANK than be in South Africa watching England right now.

Funniest entry wins a prize. Of kudos.

[The Doctor]

I would rather see scotland at the world cup than be in South Africa watching England right now.

(it's not nor was it meant to be funny - just how life should be - an 8th successive group stage failure (in 8 attempts))

[ACF]

I would rather be at a Celine Dion concert than be in South Africa watching England right now.

[CupidStunt]

I would rather suck a dead dogs dick than be in South Africa watching England right now.

[Mee]

I would rather shit on a guitar, play it and then lick it than be in South Africa watching England right now.

I'm sorry, immature moment

[Guest Bilo]

Isn't this fun?

[Narborough_fox]

I would rather be a Coventry season ticket holder than be in South Africa watching England right now.

[Edmund]

I would rather lick Susan Boyles arse crack after a sweaty steamy shit than be in South Africa watching England right now.

[purpleronnie]

I would rather have an affair with Tiger Woods.

[AyewJoking]

i would rather be the meat in a Maradona/Rafa Benitez sandwich.

[dimmerchant]

I wouldn't mind being in South Africa right now.

[Guest Bilo]

I would rather spend an evening in traction after a failed attempt to rim myself than be in South Africa watching England right now.

[Finnegan]

I would love to be in South Africa watching England right now

[Miquel The Work Geordie]

I'd love to be Garth Crook's bitch.

[lcfc_jme]

I would love to be in South Africa watching England right now

Pretty much this, accompanied by witnessing the ineptitude of France first hand as well.