OntarioFox

Means he moves level on goals with our top scoring striker with six for the season despite most of his appearances being from the bench. Leicester Reject, whoa-oa, whoa-oa

Wayne Rooney? I should be careful saying that actually... not for libel reasons, but because we all know Rudkin reads this place and would make him our new manager just to spite us.

George Hirst Ollie McBurnie Cyle Larin Richard Kone Carlton Morris All names I've seen some level of dismissal of here over the past 12 months who have more goals and assists at this level than Ayew or Daka. Even Tom Cannon as a third choice striker playing mostly off the bench and Lyndon Dykes (after barely getting minutes for Birmingham and being sold to Charlton in January) have matched the stats of our two clowns.

Good for them, today will feel like a 5-game head start for them now after fully expecting to start on -15. As for us...

Boro finishing 5th is exactly what they deserve for the amount of times they've bottled chances to secure not only 2nd, but the title as well. Don't fancy them in the playoffs at all, they're terrible under pressure. Be surprised if Wrexham don't go on to win this.

Forest Europa win Cov promoted as champions Derby win the playoffs Then whatever the hell we're doing If Carlsberg did football seasons... It'd be this one because Carlsberg is f***in shite.

Derby in the playoffs as it stands. I just have to laugh, I'm actually convinced this season is the payback for Top and Brendan doing a deal with the devil to win the FA Cup

Yeah true, I just hope the likes of Monga and Page get some encouragement. There's probably at least a small part of them that feels somewhat to blame for our situation - i mean Page was one of the three players to actually talk to the fans and apologise after Hull and he's 17 for God's sake.

Not that they deserve it, but I'm at least glad that the only youth players involved are probably already numb to the booing that the team is going to deservedly get. As much as I'd like to have seen the other youngsters who deserve gametime get minutes over the senior bozos, they don't deserve to be tainted with the association with the rest of them. As for the likes of Monga and Page, I hope they understand it's not aimed at them. Or Souttar. Anyway, giving it a miss as WhatsApp that point? The games for the playoff and automatics are far more interesting viewing than watching us today.

Put some respect on Planque's name

Sweet, so a side of kids who weren't paid for three months of the season and, even without their deduction, have amassed by far the worst points tally in the history of the second tier... is Jordan's level then. It's a bit like how he's somehow rated for Ghana, but people ignore that he's playing part timers from countries where you can count the number of grass pitches with one hand. (i know you were being sarcastic about his abilities, but i still see one or two people huffing copium on here about how he's surely not THAT bad, despite all the evidence to the contrary)

Hard to make a judgement on so little football, but considering his overall impact was getting sent off and probably costing us two points against Oxford, then missing four sitters to seal our relegation against Hull, he's got to be in contention for worst ever loan by us? Even Carranza and Édouard didn't actually do anything to directly negatively affect our season, yet this dope had two standout games for all the wrong reasons. Even Tete had that debut at Villa before we worked out he was actually three kids with club foot in a trenchcoat...

Not sure it excuses the way he always drifts wide from central positions. You're supposed to be playing as a centre forward Jordan, for God's sake stop playing like there are magnets in the corner flags! Him drifting back to those positions has broken down SO many promising attacks while he's played for us - as bad as their end product has been, Stephy and Abdul have had nobody to aim for 99% of the time! I'd go as far as to say he's a bit of an idiot. For a supposedly experienced player, he has absolutely zero football intelligence, besides his usual schtick of falling over on the ball to try to win free kicks. Even that - one of the few things I used to use as part of the mental gymnastics to excuse his shortcomings - is something he's become less and less good at, and he now often falls over, concedes possession and gets his pathetic appeals waved away. So, so glad I'll never personally have to see him play again. But I feel for the suckers travelling to Ewood Park who will likely get one last look at him sulking around the pitch like the asthmatic potato he is. The absolute poster child of our downfall for me, which is quite the accomplishment when sharing the pitch with Faes, Winks and Soumare.

Genuinely think he's been one of our biggest problems since New Years. He had that spell in December with the mad goal against Ipswich when we won a few games and it all went to his head - he's been awful 9/10 times since and loses his head a lot too, surprised he's not been sent off but that probably says more about how weak he's been in the tackle when dueling. His laziness in doing the defensive work certainly helped expose Ricardo's failing legs. Wouldn't be the first time a player's form has fallen off a cliff for us, but it happening at the same time JJ got injured finished us IMO, we all know those two dragged us through the first half of the season and saved Marti's blushes. I guess I don't blame Abdul for that exactly, it's not his fault our appalling transfer business left us with a squad reliant on a loan player and someone coming back from a 12-month injury to carry us. But you could almost see a switch flip once the onus was on him alone to produce the magic moment each game - overplaying, poor decisions, failure to beat his man, and poor discipline and losing his head regularly. Another mentality mouse of a player but one of the few where the pressure was all on him, unfairly, due to the pathetic players around him having the vision of Stevie Wonder in a cupboard. He's one of the few that will do well in a more harmonious squad IMO, but that doesn't negate what a terrible six months he's had. 100% sell for the first reasonable offer. My concern is that, like much of the rest of the squad, he's tanked his value through six months of shit performances on top of his long injury and, of course, now having relegation to the third tier on his CV. I'll be amazed, amazed, if any offers above £10-12 million come in for him, which isn't enough to start addressing our financial black hole when, for all his failures in 2026, he's still seen as one of our big assets. The only thing that I find surprising is that he's only on £10k a week. Which is still barely sustainable in League One, but I guess makes him one of the lower priorities as far as the wage bill goes.

That last automatic spot rests entirely on which QPR decide to turn up against Ipswich. They gave Derby a game at the weekend despite being on the beach, to be fair, anything could happen. A draw would make things very cagey. You'd think Millwall will get the result at home against Oxford. Boro have the toughest fixture away at Hollywoo Sgorioclwb.

"We're up against tough defences that won't lose their shape, and teams set up with a high press and counter, what should we do?" MORE PASSING! "But Jon, every other team for the past ten years has recognised that a target man has its plac-" MORE PASSING! "Jon, Stephy's got past his man twice in the past two seaso-" KEEP THE BALL!!! MORE PASSING!!! IN OUR OWN HALF!!!!

What's Sean 'The Saint' St. Ledger doing nowadays?

I imagine Charlton fans will be assuming similar over Coady, via some mental gymnastics about him being a Wrexham reject to end up there

Can we have a speed trap outside the clubhouse that triggers a lights and sounds show? Should get the punters in. 'It's the Phoenix Club! Pull off into paradise!'

On further reflection I guess 'man does not get shot' is big news in the USA.

Is this Trump shooting thing really still top story across news outlets? Must have been one hell of a slow news weekend, what more is there to discuss? The BBC in particular love, LOVE keeping stuff like this in the news cycle, even if the public lose interest. Still front page and centre of the website, but the top articles list tells you another story. Front pages are always on there, which means nobody is even reading their 24/7 coverage. He's alive and his administration are going to continue f***ing things up for the world, so what? Wake me up when he loses the midterms.

Honestly expecting them to go in for Fuchs, not because it's in any way the correct appointment off the back of one League Two relegation battle, but purely as a desperate attempt to get fans back onside in the short term with some title win nostalgia. Also would be cheap as he'd more than likely keep King on his coaching team.

I'm up north so playoffs depending it's gonna be most of the Lancashire / Yorkshire clubs for me. Salford, Wednesday (again), Barnsley, Blackpool, Bradford, Bolton. Mate's a Reading fan so will try to make an exception to get down south for that one.

Daily Express by the way, surprised they didn't blame it on Diana, immigration or the weather