Manwell Pablo Posted 10 April 2006 Posted 10 April 2006 Anyone who didn't answer sex simply isn't doing it right. Indeed, 23 weirdos to 9 normal human beings. No wonder this forum is in a state of decline
Collymore Posted 10 April 2006 Posted 10 April 2006 Well it all depends on the circumstance. Example 1 You're stuck on a freezing mountain, near no shops, dieing of hypothermia with the following: Jessica Alba A bar of chocolate The 95/96 promotion season with extended highlights of the Crystal Palace final: A £50 shopping voucher In this case, the chocolate would have to come first, your willy would probably snap off if you tried it on with JA, your fingers are to cold to try and work the DVD player (although believe me I would try) and the shopping voucher isn't much use. Apparently though, the human body (if it thinks it's gonna die) will try a last ditch effort to spread its seed so who knows? JA might get lucky Example 2 You're stuck on a warm mountain in good health with near by shopping facilities with the following: Jessica Alba A bar of chocolate The 95/96 promotion season with extended highlights of the Crystal Palace final: A £50 shopping voucher Firstly you send Alba off down the shops with the voucher to get on her good side, who knows, she might stop off at Ann Summers on the way back While Alba is away, You begin the 95/96 season review - She returns just as planned in buoyant mood and things are getting critical on the DVD with the playoff lottery. No points for guessing how the chocolate gets used next (see Alan Partridge and Gill ) The extended highlights of the final has just began (25 mins) and luckily Alba has positioned herself so you still have good vision of the screen. Now it's all about timing, as soon as you see the spider come on in sticks - you know it's time to start going to that happy place You've timed it perfectly, the balls come off Claridge's shin just in the middle of the firework display!!!!!. It's not been 30 seconds and Alba is already asking for a cuddle, you politely remind her that you still need to watch the on field recation interview with Steve Walsh and MON and that you'll be more than willing to give her a big cuddle in about 10 minutes This also gives you ample time to get the DVD at the start of the (25min) final extended highlights
Manwell Pablo Posted 10 April 2006 Posted 10 April 2006 Well it all depends on the circumstance. Example 1 You're stuck on a freezing mountain, near no shops, dieing of hypothermia with the following: Jessica Alba A bar of chocolate The 95/96 promotion season with extended highlights of the Crystal Palace final: A £50 shopping voucher In this case, the chocolate would have to come first, your willy would probably snap off if you tried it on with JA, your fingers are to cold to try and work the DVD player (although believe me I would try) and the shopping voucher isn't much use. Apparently though, the human body (if it thinks it's gonna die) will try a last ditch effort to spread its seed so who knows? JA might get lucky Example 2 You're stuck on a warm mountain in good health with near by shopping facilities with the following: Jessica Alba A bar of chocolate The 95/96 promotion season with extended highlights of the Crystal Palace final: A £50 shopping voucher Firstly you send Alba off down the shops with the voucher to get on her good side, who knows, she might stop off at Ann Summers on the way back While Alba is away, You begin the 95/96 season review - She returns just as planned in buoyant mood and things are getting critical on the DVD with the playoff lottery. No points for guessing how the chocolate gets used next (see Alan Partridge and Gill ) The extended highlights of the final has just began (25 mins) and luckily Alba has positioned herself so you still have good vision of the screen. Now it's all about timing, as soon as you see the spider come on in sticks - you know it's time to start going to that happy place You've timed it perfectly, the balls come off Claridge's shin just in the middle of the firework display!!!!!. It's not been 30 seconds and Alba is already asking for a cuddle, you politely remind her that you still need to watch the on field recation interview with Steve Walsh and MON and that you'll be more than willing to give her a big cuddle in about 10 minutes This also gives you ample time to get the DVD at the start of the (25min) final extended highlights Seek help young man.
Katy Posted 10 April 2006 Posted 10 April 2006 Whats the difference between football and sex? I dont know, what is the difference between football and sex?
hairy Posted 10 April 2006 Posted 10 April 2006 I dont know, what is the difference between football and sex? That my question. Now I am confussed
Strokes Posted 10 April 2006 Posted 10 April 2006 Anyone who didn't answer sex simply isn't doing it right. Or hasn't done it at all
Collymore Posted 10 April 2006 Posted 10 April 2006 Whats the difference between football and sex? Girls aren't very good at football
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