Some facts about Mr T

[James.]

Mr. T destroyed the periodic table, saying Mr. T. only recognizes the element of surprise.

Mr. T can walk on water. He can also walk on fire. His preference however, is to walk on fools.

Every time a church bell rings, Mr. T pities a fool.

Mr. T scared the black out of Michael Jackson.

When in the presence of Mr.T a magic-8-ball ALWAYS predicts PAIN!

Satan sold his soul to Mr. T.

Mr T tried to break the speed of light in the A-Team van because he wanted to prove that quantum physics was a bunch of Jibba Jabba.

Mr. T shot J.R

When Chuck Norris interrupted Mr. T's breakfast of diesel fuel and shovels, Mr. T stood up and Chuck Norris sh1t himself, knowing a roundhouse kick to the face was useless to Mr. T's pity

Mr T does not hunt because the word "hunting" infers the probability of failure. Mr T goes killing.

Mr T counted to infinity - twice.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Mr T

Mr T ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

When Mr T sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself. Mr T has not had to pay taxes, ever.

Mr T can touch MC Hammer.

Mr T likes to knit sweaters in his free time. And by "knit", I mean "eat", and by "sweaters", I mean "babies".

Mr T doesn't sleep. He waits

Mr T has already been to Mars. That's why there are no signs of life there

President Bush did have an exit strategy for the Iraq war. However, Mr T was too busy that day pityin' fools

If Mr T is late, time better slow it's foolin' as* down

Mr T died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.

[Leonisco]

Mr. T destroyed the periodic table, saying Mr. T. only recognizes the element of surprise.

Mr. T can walk on water. He can also walk on fire. His preference however, is to walk on fools.

Every time a church bell rings, Mr. T pities a fool.

Mr. T scared the black out of Michael Jackson.

When in the presence of Mr.T a magic-8-ball ALWAYS predicts PAIN!

Satan sold his soul to Mr. T.

Mr T tried to break the speed of light in the A-Team van because he wanted to prove that quantum physics was a bunch of Jibba Jabba.

Mr. T shot J.R

When Chuck Norris interrupted Mr. T's breakfast of diesel fuel and shovels, Mr. T stood up and Chuck Norris sh1t himself, knowing a roundhouse kick to the face was useless to Mr. T's pity

Mr T does not hunt because the word "hunting" infers the probability of failure. Mr T goes killing.

Mr T counted to infinity - twice.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Mr T

Mr T ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

When Mr T sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself. Mr T has not had to pay taxes, ever.

Mr T can touch MC Hammer.

Mr T likes to knit sweaters in his free time. And by "knit", I mean "eat", and by "sweaters", I mean "babies".

Mr T doesn't sleep. He waits

Mr T has already been to Mars. That's why there are no signs of life there

President Bush did have an exit strategy for the Iraq war. However, Mr T was too busy that day pityin' fools

If Mr T is late, time better slow it's foolin' as* down

Mr T died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Brilliant! I've heard some others aswell:

The shortest distance between two separate and distinct points is, in fact, Mr T.

23. That is the number of people Mr T has pitied in the time it took you to read this sentence.

[Phube]

I don't know why but I just find them really funny!!!

lol :laugh:

[Manwell Pablo]

Mr T pitied the sun once, a ice age followed.

[Alexikokopops]

When in the presence of Mr.T a magic-8-ball ALWAYS predicts PAIN!

"What's your prediction for the fight?"

"My prediction? Pain..."

[Flynny]

A new spin on the Chuck Norris type jokes, which were all originally Vin Diesel jokes anyway.

*yawn*

[lookwhaticando]

Mr T is the reason the favourites at Royal Ascot never win.

Oh yes.

[Bryn]

Mr T has already been to Mars. That's why there are no signs of life there

[Leonisco]

Mr T isn't actually black. The sun's just too afraid to shine on him.

[James.]

A new spin on the Chuck Norris type jokes, which were all originally Vin Diesel jokes anyay.

*yawn*

Oh get off your high horse, it's Mr F**king T, fool.

And as a punishment here's some more...

Mr. T doesn't pity anyone who likes the Black Eyed Peas. He just kills them.

Mr. T speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the situation, he is always understood.

Mr. T pities fools because even fools deserves their daily dose of vitamin T.

Mr. T and Chuck Norris once encountered each other on a lonesome British path. Before the inevitable battle could begin, the earth **** itself and created Scotland.

Mr.T once punched Chuck Norris at the exact moment he roundhouse kicked Mr.T in the chest. the result was the 80's.

On the A-team, Face , Haniabal, and Murdoch were all masters of disguise. Mr T didn't have to wear a disguise. The bad guys didn't recognize him out of fear.

Mr. T. does not break wind. He destroys it.

Mr. T invented fools. Realizing the magnitude of his folly, he then created Pity.

Mr. T is allergic to doorknobs. That's why he can only kick through doors.

Mr. T's pity for fools is used by mathematicians as a demonstration of the concept of infinity.

Mr. T once shook hands with Chuck Norris, or so it appeared, in actuality, their combined power caused an earthquake, which gave their hands a look of shaking to any onlookers, who were probably too scared to accurately testify anyway.

There are only four horsemen of the apocalypse, because Mr. T is going to walk.

[Geo V]