fazzyfox

Yes, good point. Also had the likes of Frank Sinclair and Right Back Pontus Kamark in a three at 5 foot 10" not the biggest, mobile but solid enough. It's a good blend to have one of those with two bigger lads.

Jasper Carrot used to have a joke about how on the Birmingham City Programme they would print, raffle / lottery style a "Lucky Goal" time for the first Birmingham goal, for most clubs supposedly in minutes and seconds, different on every programme with a prize for a match. He looked at his and it said "November"

For me it should be a message that they've had money and wasted it but "You've wasted all the money" is harsh on El Khanouss and Fatawu, maybe "You (something-ed) up the money" The clubs narrative will be "We had our hands tied, FFP, no wiggle room, tried this, tried that" etc but go back to July, don't sign Skipp, don't take on Eduauard, don't sign Okoli and Golding and funnel that outlay into a couple of players who affect the game every match day week in week out and that's a start, a sticking plaster but a start. We could have done better with what we had, much better. The broader picture of why we have ffp concerns in the first place, the accountability, the culture etc is the main point but I don't want the media or wider public to just believe the clubs hard luck story about this season. The truth is we couldn't take on a vibrant young enthusiastic talent from a top club on loan in January because we've got a guy from Crystal Palace putting out the cones at the training ground and watching from the stands on matchdays, with no return clause, instead.

And next week it's a Flask, a Blanket, Clappers and Rudkins Autobiography! And slightly longer dog leads for taller people to use.

Whoops, accidently opened the Tuesday Tat email......this is no mock up, they are trolling us now, taking the P This weeks selection:- A doormat - Which we've become to every other team in the league A Towel - Which we throw in early in every game, most weeks at the point of writing the team sheet The Badge - I said we've been de-valuing it, well here's the proof, reduced to less than half price And to top (no pun intended) it off - An empty Wallet !!! You couldn't make it up! READ THE ROOM YOU CRETINS!!!

I like the idea that if, sorry, when, VK is out of position and the opposition are breaking down their right wing he can go over to cover and try to deal with it in a natural looking way, not like an elephant on roller skates that a traditional CB would be. It's just whether his physicality and aerial ability is up to it in the more central areas. He certainly has more mobility than other candidates although another option would be Ricardo or Coulibally at RB and Justin as one of the outside CB's.

Imagine what he's going to be like in 2 and a bit years time, approaching 35 years old, he'll have lost his pace

Faes, Vestergaard and Rudkin

Oh but what a touch it was

Can we hide El Khannouss today otherwise the gluttonous b*****ds will try to sign him at half time. And Mads but Chelsea being Chelsea he’s probably already been wined, dined, shown round and welcomed weeks ago (that’s not meant to question his integrity btw), cough, Chilwell.

Can you give us regular updates on your progress as that will be more interesting than the match thread. I mean about the fence not the stool! Then again maybe..….

Maybe he’s keeping his powder dry for the run in

I’ve seen a badger, I believe I saw Lorn Lucan working as a waiter at a Cambridge Restaurant and I’ve seen a panther like creature in the fens, but I’ve yet to see the lesser spotted Golding, does anyone have a photo as I’m beginning to disbelieve his existence? Regarding this PSR swap around game can we remember for a moment that it’s not a console / pc game, yes they are well paid young men but the slave trade has rightly ended years ago, their careers, their families and friends, jeopardised for the sake of a spreadsheet. Dobbin was never an 8 Million pound footballer, none in that Everton / Chelsea / Villa triangle were, yes they had to agree to it but if your destination is pre-decided by the current available slot in a sleazy cycle of fraud then maybe that’s not the best or most natural destination for you.

About time Elliott did something tonight, barely noticed him

He’d drop the trophy

The summer leading into the relegation season, other than the Fofana / Faes activity which came after the season had started and losing Kasper we signed just Smithies / Smithers / Whassisface a 3rd choice goalkeeper. No Premier League Club has ever done less in a summer window (unless under embargo). With that I greatly sympathise, he often said the players need "help" that season meaning fresh faces, a bit more quality around them, a bit more cover to rotate and rest. BUT - a) We were in the FFP situation we were after his signings had come in, some failing, some unused, some alienated and no-one coming in for them. For a rebuild you need other clubs willing to come in for your players. We had been financing "his way" and run out of FFP wiggle room. I think Tielemans was massive in this, had he attracted £40 millon pound bids in his last 2 seasons he'd have been sold and some of that money made available, he wasn't and our model of moving on a "star" player was broken. I think Maddsons' hip injury prevented clubs coming in then as well. b) The way he reacted in the Brentford game by not using his bench on the hottest of days was an embarrassing tantrum, one we spent £50-£60 each to witness and those 2 dropped points ultimately would have kept us up. P***k. c) I just think he stopped fancying the job, the financial situation wouldn't be great for a while yet even if we stayed up (but still better than it has been), he wouldn't quit and lose his compensation.

But they’re misunderstood, they’re a faaaamily club, a commuuuuuunity club, they’ve chaaanged

Approaching Dyche, Dyche asks to see a list of our defenders “Ha ha ha, I said DEFENDERS” He’d probably like Souttar and Nelson but beyond that, neither available yet but he would surely bring some kind of solidity and discipline. How that helps our scoring record I don’t know though. And we’re no longer allowed to spend “many, many, many pound notes” unfortunately.

When they said Dog Leash spotted at Seagrave I mis-heard and thought Kenny was coming out of retirement to manage us

We already have Donkeys, snakes, rats and pussies (as in cowards) at Seagrave, why not welcome dogs too and have a menagerie

If that’s the CV you’re presenting….

Liaison Person “I’ve been told to walk b***dy Vestergaards dog around the training ground” Groundsman “Who’s gonna take the s**t away” Liaison Person “No-one, he’s here for another 2 1/2 years!”

They thought it was a new coach, Pup Guardiola

I heard they had to bring in a second bed and put it end to end with the other as they only have standard length ones, no wonder he looks permanently peeved poor lamb. As the dog is one that he usually takes for a walk it must be very unfit having to walk at such a slow pace all it’s life. Probably some 5 foot tall gangly thing with poor mobility and no sense of direction but persuaded Vasty to take him in for the next 3 years on a ridiculously generous expenditure of luxury dog food and grooming.

Can’t wait for the DVD, if they show Reid’s goal in slow motion from several angles it might last a good minute - two once the credits are added. Form an orderly queue folks.