Dealing with Depression

[mark1983]

On a serious note try MUSIC.

It may sound simple and silly but it helps alot!

BUt like already stated previously he MUST get professional help.

Good luck with your mate

I suffered depression after a serious car crash only baught on by the fact that i didnt know who anyone was and acted like a tit around my family.

But the thing that helped was leicester city After the crash i knew i had played football and loved watching leicester city but i couldnt find the key to remembering those times.

then i was listening to a football phone in after we got promoted to the premier league and they played the post horn gallop and WHACK all those memories came flooding back.

it certainly helped me get better as now im 99.9% better than just after the accident

good luck with your mate and tell him it can only get better it certainly did for me

[Daggers]

But the thing that helped was leicester city

"Watching City cured my depression!"

A claim I thought I'd never see - it works the other way around for me

[Guest]

I was waiting for a response like that.

Depression is a form of mental illness, granted. Serious illness? Not a chance. No one's dying. I've had many people in my family have cancer and it just pisses me off a little bit when people say that depression is a serious illness.

My post probably was a bit harsh but that's just my opinion. I'm sorry if it's not the same as everyone elses. Perhaps I'm still a bit pissed off that someone I depended on at work suddenly managed to get a sicknote for depression, and then another, and another until she got her bonus and then resigned, I don't know. Didn't mean to offend anybody.

On a side note, perhaps the friend hasn't been getting any....... - Sorry

That is the stupidest thing I've read today, and I've read some of dannyboy11's posts.

You have absolutely no idea. I hope that nobody that you cares for never has to go through any depression, not because it's a shitty thing to have to go to, but because you'd be as useful as a chocolate teapot.

Tom - be there for your mate and listen. Don't judge, just be there.

[Thracian]

'kinell!

I found myself getting all emotional over Thracian's grandson the other day and now this.

Two things I'd like to say:

1. It makes me proud to be a part of this forum and some of the caring,intelligent comments that have been made regarding those two situations above. I'm not going to post acomment on this one as I know nothing about the illness.

2. It does / should make us think about our own lives, albeit for a few minutes. Here's me, no job, no fecking money and feeling sorry for myself and others 'close' (in a forum regular sense) have much bigger problems.

Now I have to go and abuse a chav to cheer myself up.

Best of luck, Tomassi. Be a mate and you'll help your mate

And I hope all is ok in the Thracian household too.

Thanks Kent Fox and to all those who have expressed sympathy and concern for my grandson. It is very much appreciated.

[Geo V]

Hello,

I have a good friend whos just informed me he is taking tablets for depression and it is at a critical stage if you get what i mean. Nothing in particular has triggered it. I feel Depression is a serious illness that shouldn't be taken lightly but how do you deal with it?

I'm taking my mate out and treat him to try and make him feel good by being there for him, talk about issues etc but does anyone have any tips that may or may not help?

Cheers

Tom

6+ years ago I think I got seriously depressed after my mother died of cancer and I decided to leave my then partner and quit work. Thankfully I never bothered with doctors, pills and the rest of the crap that so many people take and had a strong family around me to see it through. Its definately a weird old illness as a week goes by and you dont realise it sometimes and you have a day where you think "OK, time to do something about this" and the next thing you know you have a 5 did beard and the hair is a mess (beards may not count with women but I am from Cypriot parentage and some do have tashes ).

Anyway, to answer the question, be there for your mate as it sounds like you are and try and get him into something new whether its the gym or another hobby. I personally got out of the dumps or depression or whatever you want to call it when something clicked inside me to tell me not to slack off as I had a 2yo son then from a previous relationship. Something has got to click within for that person but getting them into new stuff usually helps.

Also get them pills or whatever he has away from him.

[kevinwpratt]

Wow some interesting responses, i have just returned to work following a breakdown brought on by stress and depression i have heard various arguements for and against tablets but i chose to combine tablets and councelling and this seems to be working....

If depression isnt treated then it CAN actually be life threatening because this person is likely to become more and more depressed which ultimately could lead to suicide.

There are different levels of depression and different kinds of treatment available but i wouldnt wish how i felt on anyone it may not be cancer or aids etc but its a very real illness..

[Zingari]

I was waiting for a response like that.

Depression is a form of mental illness, granted. Serious illness? Not a chance. No one's dying. I've had many people in my family have cancer and it just pisses me off a little bit when people say that depression is a serious illness.

My post probably was a bit harsh but that's just my opinion. I'm sorry if it's not the same as everyone elses. Perhaps I'm still a bit pissed off that someone I depended on at work suddenly managed to get a sicknote for depression, and then another, and another until she got her bonus and then resigned, I don't know. Didn't mean to offend anybody.

On a side note, perhaps the friend hasn't been getting any....... - Sorry

i've got a lot of sympathy and agree in part with what you say ; i do think however think genuine clinical depression is serious but there is an awful lot of lead swinging going on ;and agree with you it seems to be easily abused

an awful lot of emotional blackmail is used by many who claim to be suffering from it and with all the supposed advances in psychiatric treatment the rate of suicide seems to alter very little over time so sadly the efforts put in seem not to alter the eventual outcome .

If anything the rates have got worse so all the focus on treatment could be said to be counter productive; either way the statistics do not seem to indicate that treatment is in any way effective against lowering suicide rates

http://www.statistics.gov.uk/statbase/ssda...t.asp?vlnk=5228

i'm sure there are lots of people who's lives have been affected by genuine sufferers but i'm equally sure there are lots of people who's lives have been ruined by "boo hoo misfits" and attention seekers

[Daggers]

personally got out of the dumps or depression or whatever you want to call it when something clicked inside me to tell me not to slack off

You were not clinically depressed - you were grieving the loss of your mother. These are totally different things.

People can not 'click out of' depression.

Also get them pills or whatever he has away from him.

No! Absolutely not.

[Daggers]

i've got a lot of sympathy and agree in part with what you say ; i do think however think genuine clinical depression is serious but there is an awful lot of lead swinging going on ;and agree with you it seems to be easily abused

an awful lot of emotional blackmail is used by many who claim to be suffering from it and with all the supposed advances in psychiatric treatment the rate of suicide seems to alter very little over time so sadly the efforts put in seem not to alter the eventual outcome .

If anything the rates have got worse so all the focus on treatment could be said to be counter productive; either way the statistics do not seem to indicate that treatment is in any way effective against lowering suicide rates

http://www.statistics.gov.uk/statbase/ssda...t.asp?vlnk=5228

i'm sure there are lots of people who's lives have been affected by genuine sufferers but i'm equally sure there are lots of people who's lives have been ruined by "boo hoo misfits" and attention seekers

I don't get your link between "advances in psychiatry" and "rate of suicide seems to alter very little over time"? A link is not possible as societal changes have spawned suicides in sectors that are not, nor were, undergoing any form of therapy...thus not benefiting from any "advances" (although I'd argue there have been little).

Also, the stats clearly demonstrate a considerable increase in rate of suicide in men under 45.

What is clear from practice is that not receiving treatment places a person in greater risk than one who is undergoing therapy and/or medication.

Also, I would suggest that debates over the 'lead-swinging' or otherwise of people skiving off work would probably best suit another thread as they serve no direct benefit to Tom and his friend?

[Katy]

Comments such as 'pull yourself together' don't help one jot, it just serves to make them feel worse (it does with me anyway)

have a bit of compassion and realise that people aren't the same and deal with things differently - well done you for being so

perfect, so I hope City Fan nothing triggers off feelings of total and utter crapness, desperation, suicidal thoughts, worthlessness and failure

(amongst other things) in your life.

[Zingari]

I don't get your link between "advances in psychiatry" and "rate of suicide seems to alter very little over time"? A link is not possible as societal changes have spawned suicides in sectors that are not, nor were, undergoing any form of therapy...thus not benefiting from any "advances" (although I'd argue there have been little).

Also, the stats clearly demonstrate a considerable increase in rate of suicide in men under 45.

What is clear from practice is that not receiving treatment places a person in greater risk than one who is undergoing therapy and/or medication.

Also, I would suggest that debates over the 'lead-swinging' or otherwise of people skiving off work would probably best suit another thread as they serve no direct benefit to Tom and his friend?

as i was replying to someone else who raised the doubts in this thread i had to reply to it in this one ( sorry if this offends you or tom and friend )

i was merely agreeing with him that the symptoms of "depression" does appear to be easily abused by lead swingers ( as have bad backs etc) that is not to say there are not genuine bad back sufferers or depressives .

the link between advances in psychiatry and treatment of depressives and a seemingly insignificant change in the rates of suicide indicates to me that any treatment is not effectual in the long term ; surely any advancement in any particular field of medicine should have an impact on the long term benefits of sufferers and population wide and a decline in deaths should result

So i can only assume that genuinely suicidal people do not enlist the help of therapists or that the therapy itself is ineffectual;

For instance if doctors claimed to be treating cancer sufferers with drugs to prolong life but statistics were stating that in reality sufferers were dying at the same rate as prior to the treatment one would expect questions to be asked about the effacacy of the treatment , would they not ?

You state that it is clear that a person recieving treatment is less likely to commit suicide , but all that may indicate is that those with genuine suicidal tendencies do not enlist the help of therapists but go ahead and commit suicide ( mainly because they really are suicidal) as opposed to the others sufferers who are or maybe depressed but not actually suicidal

If suicide rates were falling then it may be reasonable to draw a conclusion that the efforts put into this field were worthwhile but sadly they do not, and i genuinely believe that there is a propencity to commit suicide that goes beyond the logic of psychiatric help

ps welcome back

[City Fan]

i've got a lot of sympathy and agree in part with what you say

Cheers BB, I can almost guarantee that there are many forum members who agree with me, but daren't admit it after seeing the amount of abuse I have been given for voicing my opinion.

This world would be boring if everyone thought the same.

[Zingari]

Cheers BB, I can almost guarantee that there are many forum members who agree with me, but daren't admit it after seeing the amount of abuse I have been given for voicing my opinion.

This world would be boring if everyone thought the same.

that ok i get used to being called a "retard" for having the timerity to voice opinions that are out of kilter with the chosen ones, but as you say , it certainly would be a boring place if everyone agreed all the time. After all, if the experts rarely seem agree on anything what chance have the rest of us got ?

I really don't see whats wrong with disagreements about all sorts of issues but all too soon some members readily resort to name calling and insults

[Katy]

that ok i get used to being called a "retard" for having the timerity to voice opinions that are out of kilter with the chosen ones, but as you say , it certainly would be a boring place if everyone agreed all the time. After all, if the experts rarely seem agree on anything what chance have the rest of us got ?

I really don't see whats wrong with disagreements about all sorts of issues but all too soon some members readily resort to name calling and insults

Because this is an emotive subject close to some people's hearts and being spiteful towards people with the condition doesn't help and isn't nice. Tom was asking for advice not asking for people saying his mate (and everyone else with the condition) is a faker.

[BartonFox]

Cheers BB, I can almost guarantee that there are many forum members who agree with me, but daren't admit it after seeing the amount of abuse I have been given for voicing my opinion.

This world would be boring if everyone thought the same.

I bet they don't agree with you as most of them have an IQ higher than a gnat unlike you.

Opinions are fine but it's choosing the right time to voice them. You are crass and no amount of back tracking or trying to make out you are being hard done by will save your face on this one. Do the right thing and make a tactical retreat

[Finnegan]

There's a huge difference between being opinionated and being fooking ignorant. I pray to god you never have to cope with depression, CF, but I also hope that should you ever do so you live to feel deeply ashamed, embarassed and guilty for comments made here.

[McFox]

loas of good advice in the replies (mostly)- only thing i'd add is that it can depend on what has led to your mate feeling low in the first place- if (like for a lot of folk) it's as a result of being "stuck in a rut" or getting fed up of the routine and thinking "whats the point" etc then the simplest thing is to start making small change to their routine- variety being the spice of life and all that- even just small changes to your day to day life can make a difference.

[Flynny]

'kinell!

I found myself getting all emotional over Thracian's grandson the other day and now this.

Two things I'd like to say:

1. It makes me proud to be a part of this forum and some of the caring,intelligent comments that have been made regarding those two situations above. I'm not going to post acomment on this one as I know nothing about the illness.

2. It does / should make us think about our own lives, albeit for a few minutes. Here's me, no job, no fecking money and feeling sorry for myself and others 'close' (in a forum regular sense) have much bigger problems.

Now I have to go and abuse a chav to cheer myself up.

Best of luck, Tomassi. Be a mate and you'll help your mate

And I hope all is ok in the Thracian household too.

[lcfcalan]

Tom , you are quite simply a good man. Your efforts in 'being there' for your mate will be a help , of that I have no doubt.

Having lived with someone suffering from a 'depression ' for the past 26 yrs or so (finally diagnosed as psychopathic) , yes folks it can take that long for diagnosis, I am

more and more angry that in this day and age , people can be so dismissive of mental health issues.

Drugs are a key to help in some cases, counciling may help other cases, but for sure , a good friend is always a help.

Good luck to your friend, I hope he finds peace in his mind, and good luck to you , no doubt we will catch up for pint sometime next season.

[Barry Trotter]

Hello,

I have a good friend whos just informed me he is taking tablets for depression and it is at a critical stage if you get what i mean. Nothing in particular has triggered it. I feel Depression is a serious illness that shouldn't be taken lightly but how do you deal with it?

I'm taking my mate out and treat him to try and make him feel good by being there for him, talk about issues etc but does anyone have any tips that may or may not help?

Cheers

Tom

Start golf

[Thracian]

Start golf

That can work two ways in my experience!

[BartonFox]

That can work two ways in my experience!

So can following the fortunes of the Scottish national team..............................

At anything

[Finnegan]

So can following the fortunes of the Scottish national team..............................

At anything

At least you were alive last time Scotland got to a major footballing competition. But, then again, you've got a shite rugby history (recent and old), so I guess that's the trade off.

[Rincewind]

Depression is now recognised as an illness. It has been many years since the general consensus was 'to pull yourself together' Even doctors used to say this. But there have been advances in medicine and the study of it. Even the Joe Public is more knowledgeable about a wide number of subjects. Why should anyone want to stay in the dark ages with out-dated views? The increase in cases could be due somewhat to the broader understanding of depression so more people are diognosed as having the illness. I do not think that i have the right to go against people who have studied the subject and tell them that they are wrong.

[Lillehamring]

6+ years ago I think I got seriously depressed after my mother died of cancer and I decided to leave my then partner and quit work. Thankfully I never bothered with doctors, pills and the rest of the crap that so many people take and had a strong family around me to see it through. Its definately a weird old illness as a week goes by and you dont realise it sometimes and you have a day where you think "OK, time to do something about this" and the next thing you know you have a 5 did beard and the hair is a mess (beards may not count with women but I am from Cypriot parentage and some do have tashes ).

Anyway, to answer the question, be there for your mate as it sounds like you are and try and get him into something new whether its the gym or another hobby. I personally got out of the dumps or depression or whatever you want to call it when something clicked inside me to tell me not to slack off as I had a 2yo son then from a previous relationship. Something has got to click within for that person but getting them into new stuff usually helps.

Also get them pills or whatever he has away from him.

yes - but, no... pills can be wrong and dangerous, but for many, they are the only solution, certainly in the short term