samjohnson Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 Stick your best football jokes here Whats the difference between Leicester and Arsenal? Leicester have won silverwear this season
Ashley Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 I think my satnavs broke its saying Chelsea 2 minutes away from Rome
Fez of Mahrez Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 What do you call it when a Spanish striker goes clear through against a Spanish goalkeeper? Juan on Juan.
Fox You Forest Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 What do you call it when a Spanish striker goes clear through against a Spanish goalkeeper?Juan on Juan. Shocking, yet still amusing.
lildave3 Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 That's not even a joke? Exactly! Ridiculous start to the thread
Edmund Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 Whats the difference between Nigel Pearson and Milan Mandaric? Pearson is the manager and Mandaric is the chairman. You will find there is delay in laughter but it will come... eventually....
Granno Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 Alan Shearer is the worst caretaker since Ian Huntley. Shocking, but funny.
samjohnson Posted 7 May 2009 Author Posted 7 May 2009 Whats the difference between Nigel Pearson and Milan Mandaric?Pearson is the manager and Mandaric is the chairman. You will find there is delay in laughter but it will come... eventually.... yes! Love it!
Sparky Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 Shocking one from 1993 ish Alex Ferguson said to Kevin Keegan " Ill swop you Robson for Cole" Keegan replies " Yeh ok , how many bags "
Hitesh Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 If you are locked in a room with a Lion, Tiger and a Derby County fan but you had a gun with 2 bullets in...what would you do? Shoot the Derby fan twice...
Hitesh Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 A Chelsea fan walks into a Library and asks for a book on Penalties. The Librarian says fook off you ain't getting one!
Joe. Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 Following Chelsea's exit from the Champions League last night, Samsung have withdrawn their sponsorship. But don't worry, they've got a new one already...
MarkDeVries Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 This is of a bad taste so if your a bit Religous looks away. Jesus went up for a cross and got nailed by two defenders I WARNED YOU.
Miquel The Work Geordie Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 Wayne Rooney takes a dump on the England changing room floor. Outraged, Fabio Cappello asks: "Who's shit on the floor?" Peter Crouch replies: "Me boss, but I'm good in the air!" Yeah I didn't say it was good.
Shane Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 What does Gary Megson say when Bolton score? Fantastic. Now let us try to get goal at other end of pitch.
Shane Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 How many Nottingham Forest supporters does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Both of them
Shane Posted 7 May 2009 Posted 7 May 2009 Fed up of forking out on for a Derby kit just to show your support? Simply attach a sticker saying "Idiot" to your forehead and it will be perfectly clear to everyone who you support. What do you call a Manchester United fan with half a brain? Gifted. What's the difference between Alex Ferguson and God? God doesn't think he's Alex Ferguson. How can you tell when Leeds are losing? It's five past three. What do you call a Leeds fan in a 2 bedroomed Semi? A burglar
General Smuts Posted 8 May 2009 Posted 8 May 2009 Alan Shearer is the worst caretaker since Ian Huntley. Shingler special:
Guest Bilo Posted 8 May 2009 Posted 8 May 2009 Bloke driving through Nottingham on his way to a Forest game and gets lost. He sees a lad in a Forest shirt, so decides to pull up and ask directions. 'Excuse me mate' says the bloke 'How do you get to the City Ground?' 'Me dad takes me.' NEWSFLASH: Two professional footballers are suspected of burglary. Police have interviewed all players in the Premiership and Championship, but have found no Leeds. Derby fan on a driving test. Halfway through the examiner says, 'Can you make a u-turn?' 'No, but I can make it's fooking eyes water.' What have a Cov fan and a slinky got in common? Neither serve any real purpose, but it can be fun to watch one fall down a flight of stairs.
Ultra Posted 8 May 2009 Posted 8 May 2009 How do you know when a Chelsea fan's on your plane? You can hear whining after the engines are switched off.
Salieri Posted 8 May 2009 Posted 8 May 2009 Would have been quite apt last season : Our team is doing so badly that "Manager of the Month" isn't an award. It's an appointment!
Ultra Posted 8 May 2009 Posted 8 May 2009 Most Premier League Clubs invite their fans to vote for goal of the month - except Middlesbrough's, who vote for month of the goal..
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