Stupid/funny things your mates have said.

[Tony Pine]

someone in this thread using the phrase coloured

i guess that comes under mildly racist retardation as opposed to stupid/funny

[easilee]

Think this topic should include family aswell.

When i was a kid and i asked "muuum, whats for dinner" quite often the answer would be "shit & sugar"!!

[FoxyPV]

A family member when studying Macbeth said about the text "I wish they would just get over themselves...running about on horses, with cloaks and swords...like they wanted to be ninjas"

i was dumbfounded by this statement

[Rocket-Ron]

A bloke at work walked into a bin which smaked him in the bollox.He looked up at me with tears in his eyes and said " Oh no....I think I broke my penis "

[jonno24]

i was at work last week and there was talk of a certain well hated staff member coming to work in our department we were chatting about this and i said

"if he comes in here there will be a mass exodus"

to which a 17 year old new starter replies

"yeah or everyone will leave"

[Bert]

My brother -

Was at my dads house and he was drinking a can of Pedigree, (not the dog food) and on the can it said "Still brewed in wood" My brother said, "Dad, where's wood?"

Also, he once rang my dad's housephone, and asked him where my dad was.

[samlcfc]

My dad went to my grandads house once and on the door he left a note. "Gone out, be back soon. Keys to door under mat"

[davieG]

My dad went to my grandads house once and on the door he left a note. "Gone out, be back soon. Keys to door under mat"

There was a time, probably when your granddad was a kid that this was common practice because you could be safe in the knowledge that no one would take advantage of it and break in due to there being closer knit communities and everyone knowing everyone, oh plus the fact no one had anything worth stealing

[Zingari]

Jason McAteer was once asked if he wanted his pizza cut in quarters or 8 pieces ,

he replied " just quarters , I couldn't manage to eat 8 pieces "

I stopped to give someone a lift in my small sports car ( MG Midget ) and as he struggled to get in he said " fookin ell , you need to be a fookin extortionist to get in here "

[PAULCFC]

Went up town with my gf at the time and went into a pub that had the old blue neon lights shining down from the roof.(this was mid 90's,they were the lights that if you had a bit of dust on your shoulders it made you look as if you had a major case of dandruff).Thought i was complemating her on her new streaks in her hair."What streaks? Thats grey".needless to say the relationship didn't last.

[PAULCFC]

Think this topic should include family aswell.

When i was a kid and i asked "muuum, whats for dinner" quite often the answer would be "shit & sugar"!!

Shit with sugar on......my mum used to tell me that too!

[Orkneyfox]

There was a time, probably when your granddad was a kid that this was common practice because you could be safe in the knowledge that no one would take advantage of it and break in due to there being closer knit communities and everyone knowing everyone, oh plus the fact no one had anything worth stealing

It is still pretty much that way up here.

[Unit]

Shit with sugar on......my mum used to tell me that too!

Same here... what the fook? are we all brothers or are all our mums weird?

[DB11]

Same here... what the fook? are we all brothers or are all our mums weird?

I've never heard of that saying.

[FoxyPV]

Same here... what the fook? are we all brothers?

I've never heard of that saying.

you hear it a lot around norwich

[easilee]

The sugar to shit ratio actually made it quite palatable

[AoWW]

you hear it a lot around norwich

:glare: Well I've never heard it.

[FoxyPV]

:glare: Well I've never heard it.

[AoWW]

'nuff from you.

[acooling08]

'Let's bring DJ back'

[Sparky]

Spain has the most Muslims. It doesn't.

Haha, he read it a book

[Jimothy]

Bloke behind me at Hillsborough today, after the Wednesday keeper saved a shot in the first half said, "If he hadn't saved that it would have gone in".