Countryfox

There was an Englishman, an Irishman, a Scotsman, a Welshman .... an Egyptian, a Pole, a Swede, an American, a Lithuanian, a Belgian, a Norwegian, an Australian, a Jamaican, a Nigerian .... an Israeli, a Dane, a Bulgarian .... and a Russian .... standing outside a nightclub. And the doorman says, "Sorry you can't come in cus you haven't got a Thai". [Thats a life time ban for me on the way ! ].

The bloody tractor driver that nearly ran we off the road this morning .... and to make it worse the 12 year old that was driving it was on the phone !

Horrible little toad.

One day the Farmer says to his wife "Tomorrow lady, you, me and t'dog are goin' shootin'" "But I don't wanna go shootin'" says the wife "Listen to me lady" says the Farmer ... "tomorrow, you, me and t'dog are goin' shootin'" "But you know I don't like shootin'. I hate shootin !!'. I'd do ANYTHIN' rather than go shootin'" "Oh ANYTHIN' is it?" says the Farmer. "Well in that case you've got two choices" With that he drops his trousers and takes out his John Thomas, "You can either 'ave this in yer mouth or up yer arse"! "Oh all right" says his wife "I'll 'ave it in me mouth" He shoves his cock in her mouth. "Ooh yer dirty bugger" she says "It tastes of shit!" "I know" says the Farmer "T'dog didn't want to go shootin' either"!

Well it worked for me !! .... I know what I'll be drinking tonight ..... not that real ale shite that I normally drink but a pint of Fosters !!! The power of advertising. Mind you, if a woman with giant hooters does't come and stand over it, its back to the shite.

Copied from a pub toilet in Lutterworth.

Anyway !! .... Spotted that big red headed girl who does the sport on East Midlands Today, sat on my kitchen table trying on a halloween costume.

Well I thought it was at the time Cap'n ... (It was only meant to try and cheer everybody up after the Hull game) .... but not so sure now .... Anyway, still trying to make it smaller so may not be able to post it anyway !!

Thieving robbing bast*rds who advertise something, get the cash then don't deliver !! Just google simply mirrors and up they pop ... but the company is dissolved and the guy who runs it (Kelvin, a Leeds fan) has been doing this type of scam for years ... list of folded companies and CCJ's as long as your arm. Sucks you in by emailing and ringing with lots of questions about what you want and when they will be delivered .... which gets delayed and delayed. Then, suddenly (after you've sent the money cus the mirror is ready), never answers calls and stops replying to emails. I only got my money back after explaining what would happen if i didn't but I expect a lot of people wouldn't be so lucky. Like I said a robbing, thieving, nasty little bast*rd.

Well done and thanks Davie !! More reply options ... of course !! Just got to try and make it smaller (normally easier than making it bigger), and I think I'm nearly there .... err, how do you do that ???

Photo geeks please help ..... wanted to put a pic on of that big presenter woman from EMT but don't know how to do it. Took pic on iphone, then when on iphoto on my mac dragged it over to the desktop. Then dragged over to the reply topic on the forum but it doesn't seem to want to go there. ?????

Thats just not funny. But d'you know what ... I never did it again after that.

12th man wins close game !

Definitely have Kante on the post instead of trying to mark giants !

Looking forward to the next one !

Walked into The Rutland and Derby on Millstone Lane a few years ago (about 2006 ish) and these 3 old boys were stood there having a drink ... Only John Sjoberg, Pete Rodrigues and Mike Stringfellow .... lovely to speak to them and tell them how much I enjoyed watching them ... Pete and John were fairly quiet but Stringy was on top form ..... gave him a quick rendition of "You ain't seen nothing like the mighty String !" before I left (yes I'd had a few) .... Sadly, John is no longer with us.

Dont worry about it they swear at me all the time ! Now then ... could this be the year we win a cup ????

Like I said, Benny the Loony is wired !!

Gonna be interesting to see who gets the most abuse by the end of the season .... Benny the Looney or Ritchie (lets blame him) DeLaet. I like DeL (quick, has the ability but doesn't always show it and can get caught out) and too early to tell about Benny (although so far he looks a little wired) .. IMO.

Anyone wasting there life on Twitter or facebollox in this house got a right load of abuse from me .... look at me now .. never off the computer. Bloody LCFC !!

The mans inscrutable and I love him !!!! When he puts that bandanna on the opposition will REALLY get worried .... !