Jamie Vard-on

We really are shit now, aren’t we.

It’s the recent Oxford 4-0 hammering. Losing 4-0 at League One to a team like Oxford is a totally humiliating experience. At home too. Losing to a premier team is bad, but the standards cushion the humiliation. Getting demolished by a fairly mediocre team at League One level is a new level of shite.

Russell Martin is a grifter. He’s the David Brent of football management, and he’s been woeful everywhere he’s been. Get rid of this waster, or we’ll be relegated by Spring.

At least we’ll be winning more games in League 2.

The club’s in free fall.

After that performance I’m confident Russell Martin will get us out of this division… and into League 2.

I found the new rules in the World Cup totally baffling at times and inconsistent.

We won 3-3. 😎

I think Rodgers’ Leicester team was arguably as good as the won that won the league. Not sure what went wrong, but pre covid we looked nailed on for a Champions League position. Rodgers isn’t full of shit.

Drury is hit and miss. He always sounds like he’s trying too hard to create a poetic moment with tortured metaphors, and an emotional tone that combines awestruck captivation and bed-wetting enthusiasm.

There’s no way we could afford Vardy’s wages anyway. Unless you paid him in red bulls and chewing tobacco.

Since Brendan Roger’s left, the wheels were coming off. I know Enzo did well, but that season was basically an audition for him to get better clubs. He must’ve known he could bounce back and took the risk. After that, the club has felt like a wheelie bin filled with concrete perched on a lake of quicksand.

There’s a lot of wasters and bullshitters at the heart of club, that were able to parasite their way to a cushy job after Vichai departed. But like woodworm in your floor boards, you don’t notice it immediately. But after 10 years of nibbling away, you collapse. Unless someone cuts out the rot, we could be in serious trouble. Not sure Top has the awareness, interest or balls to fix it.

I know it’s a sensitive topic, but the female commentators don’t work for me. I’m not sure exactly why, but I think it has something to do with their high pitched voices clashing with the crowd noises. They have a tendency to get slightly shrill when things get exciting, and it sounds wrong. Same with some of the higher pitched male commentators too. A deeper voice works better, and anchors the tonal range better. However my dislike of female pundits is probably just sexism! 😎

It’s so weird to think we’ll be playing AFC Wimbledon and Bromley next season. I remember a decade or so ago when AFC Wimbledon had trials on a park, and began from the bottom tier. It really is so brutally humbling. I remember our stint in League 1 in 2008, and I’m still tingling from hearing the Champions League anthem serenading King Power Stadium. And here we. Football, aye. So glorious and horrible.

I like the look of Will Alves. He seems to have something.

The younger lads have the advantage of not carrying the burden of humiliation and actually wanting to play. They have that feverish desire to battle, which so many seasoned pros lose once they realise they’re never going to win a Ballon D’or.

Because Harborough would probably win.

It’s weird to think only a decade ago we were spaffing 30 million quid on bench-warmers like Islam Slimani, now we’re struggling to sign arthritic no hopers like Danny Ings on a free. nothing humbled you like football, I guess.

I really dislike the introduction of “game day” music. I understand music playing when people are finding their seats, or stuffing their faces with meat pies at half-time, but I wish they’d stop playing crap music whenever someone scores. Even in the World Cup they’re doing this, and it’s so tacky. There is no better sound than an authentic crowd reaction, whether it’s the mumble of anticipation, the groans of disappointment or the roaring of celebration. i hate the commercialising and corporatising. So trite.

BREAKING: Leicester now are progressing with the Danny Ings signing after they tracked down a wheelchair fitted with football studs.

That’s the thing. Steve Walsh was the scout then I think, and he found some absolute gems. Now we’re scraping the barrels or operating like a pension plan for elderly journeymen with dodgy knees.

I hate the Palace kit. Seems very disrespectful to abandoned the iconic colours.

Why are we using the old badge on the away kits? Seems so weird. Surely you want consistency and brand recognition? Almost like they’re trying to play a season in League 1 incognito.

I’d accept 7 pence and a packet of smoky bacon crisps.