Phube Posted 28 July 2006 Posted 28 July 2006 you can't hang a man with false teeth! Physically or in Law??
macbeth Posted 28 July 2006 Posted 28 July 2006 The Worlds strongest ale was sold at the Bristol Real Ale Festival in 2003. It was called Owd Nob Ripper and had a healthy OG of 1527. John Lummox, who paid the requisite £48.00, received a sherry sized glass containing the lethal nectar. When he came too, in the First Aid tent, he declared the beverage to be "the tits", said it was slightly woody and passed out again for the next 17 hours. what a great lummox he was lummox by name........
Daggers Posted 28 July 2006 Posted 28 July 2006 All the random facts I have posted here may have been figments of my imagination
Daggers Posted 28 July 2006 Posted 28 July 2006 Psychologists have discovered that people who spend more than a reasonable amount of time posting on internet forums are not the sad, lonely and depressed bunch of potential psychopaths, stalkers and nutters they have been always been portrayed as. Recent surveys have revealed that such interaction actually builds the ability to communicate in the real world without relying on alcohol to overcome massive attacks of nerves [especially when near members of the opposite sex]. Scientists actually proved that a surprising number of forum users actually have girlfriends/boyfriends or are married. It is predicted that computer nerds are to become the celebrities of the 21st Century ~ especially the podgy, balding, middle aged ones. Honest.
Rincewind Posted 28 July 2006 Posted 28 July 2006 One sneeze can shoot 20,000 droplets of moisure four metres away. To test the effectiveness of deodorants many companies employ 'assessors' whose job it is to spend their working days sniffing other peoples armpits. In a typical test, a team of volunteers, male and female, have their armpits sprayed or rolled with the test product. A number of hours later, they return to be sniffed by assessors. The assessor' sense of smell is so acute, they claim to be able to detect, by the smell of sweat what a person had for dinner the night before. The pong-level (known as'maodour' in the trade) is assessed on a scale one to five. For those who think their job is boring, mabe a change in career is what they need.
Lukeh Posted 28 July 2006 Posted 28 July 2006 If you rub a mole and tell him you love, he will jump off your face and back into the ground ...
Collymore Posted 28 July 2006 Posted 28 July 2006 Steven Seagal doesn't need to have sex to impregnate a woman, he can simply give her a facial.
Lemon Harpic Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 Rob Kelly is actually not a very good football manager, and will be found out next season.
macbeth Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 TFCA yeah right random fact The flapping of a single butterfly's wing today produces a tiny change in the state of the atmosphere. Over a period of time, what the atmosphere actually does diverges from what it would have done. So, in a month's time, a tornado that would have devastated the Indonesian coast doesn't happen. Or maybe one that wasn't going to happen, does. (Ian Stewart, Does God Play Dice? The Mathematics of Chaos, pg. 141) so all we've got to do to prevent tornadoes is find this butterfly and ( look away animal rights nutters).............. stamp on it
Daggers Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 yeah right random fact The flapping of a single butterfly's wing today produces a tiny change in the state of the atmosphere. Over a period of time, what the atmosphere actually does diverges from what it would have done. So, in a month's time, a tornado that would have devastated the Indonesian coast doesn't happen. Or maybe one that wasn't going to happen, does. (Ian Stewart, Does God Play Dice? The Mathematics of Chaos, pg. 141) so all we've got to do to prevent tornadoes is find this butterfly and ( look away animal rights nutters).............. stamp on it Damn right Butterfly farms = Evil terrorist training camps The bloomin fluttery multicoloured basturds
Jay Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 When Heinz ketchup leaves the bottle, it travels at a rate of 25 miles per year.
Jay Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 An albatross can sleep while it flies. It apparently dozes while cruising at 25 mph.
Jay Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 40,000 Americans are injured by toilets each year WOO HOO thats the 1000 up for me!!
Rincewind Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 I've known some drives to do that as well. They are the ones that tend to be very late for meetings.
Rincewind Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 Leicester University once held a Golden Pillow contest for the most boring lecturer of the year. The winner was a phyicist who spoke on 'classical mechanical formallism for motion in an infinate viscous medium' The runner-up, who was awarded the Silver Pillow, lectured on the German vocabulary, particularly words for parts of the leg below the ankle. Both pillows were stuffed with shredded papers from boring lectures.
Daggers Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 When Nietsche wrote "Gott ist tot" in his classic work 'Also sprach Zarathustra', little did he know how wrong he was. God is alive and well and lives in a terrace house, 14 Winnie Mandela Close, Colchester.
macbeth Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 My Dad is better than your Dad are you sure..........mother's baby but father's ....maybe
Daggers Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 are you sure..........mother's baby but father's ....maybe The thread called for random facts, and my Dad is best at everything. You questioning my knowledge MacBeth? You'd better not be otherwise my Dad will have to climb into his car, get onto a ferry, take his pills and call round to sort it all out!
macbeth Posted 29 July 2006 Posted 29 July 2006 MacBeth, is the Isle of White ferry really brown? the isle of wight ferries are red/white (red funnel) and navy /white (wightlink) what you may have heard is the crap old joke what is brown and comes steaming out of cowes..........iow ferry they are at the moment hard to see due to the masses of yachts charging through the solent for the skandia cowes regatta; the biggest in the world so they claim
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