Knighton Matt Posted 3 August 2006 Posted 3 August 2006 Post all your mates/girlfriends/wives blonde moments... I'll start... Mate - "Me and Matt just ate far too many sausages. I don't think I'll ever eat pork again." Mate's gf - "Sausages come from PIGS?!!!!"
Janx Posted 3 August 2006 Posted 3 August 2006 Post all your mates/girlfriends/wives blonde moments... I'll start... Mate - "Me and Matt just ate far too many sausages. I don't think I'll ever eat pork again." Mate's gf - "Sausages come from PIGS?!!!!"
Knighton Matt Posted 3 August 2006 Author Posted 3 August 2006 Matt - "Can't make it late one tonight I've got to drive to Newcastle early tomorrow morning" Girl mate - "Isn't that in Scotland? And isn't there water in the way how do you drive over that?" :laugh:
Janx Posted 3 August 2006 Posted 3 August 2006 Matt - "Can't make it late one tonight I've got to drive to Newcastle early tomorrow morning" Girl mate - "Isn't that in Scotland? And isn't there water in the way how do you drive over that?" :laugh: :w00t: stop it ambassador! With these ****wits you are spoiling us!!
Knighton Matt Posted 3 August 2006 Author Posted 3 August 2006 :w00t: stop it ambassador! With these ****wits you are spoiling us!! :w00t: :thumbsup:
macbeth Posted 3 August 2006 Posted 3 August 2006 me " he's flying from tokyo to los angeles" wife goes to look at map " thats from one side of the world right across the page to the other"
Head Honcho Posted 3 August 2006 Posted 3 August 2006 Watching Steptoe and Son and the wife once asked me which one is Steptoe .....and she once asked for Paralysed Milk!
Knighton Matt Posted 3 August 2006 Author Posted 3 August 2006 me " he's flying from tokyo to los angeles" wife goes to look at map " thats from one side of the world right across the page to the other" Watching Steptoe and Son and the wife once asked me which one is Steptoe .....and she once asked for Paralysed Milk! All classics! Keep them coming!
Bert Posted 3 August 2006 Posted 3 August 2006 On a train to Skegness, with my brother, cousin and two mates. We're all just talking amongst ourselves, then we approach some power plants that appear to be rusty, and my mate Gaz says: "Are those wooden power plants?" Another time the same person rang up a pizza shop and asked for " A delivery to take away" My brother came out with a pretty good one too, he was at my dads and him and my dad was drinking pedigree bitter and on the tin it says: "still brewed in wood" and my brother says: "Dad, where's wood?"
macbeth Posted 3 August 2006 Posted 3 August 2006 stopped to pick up friend of gf when i was in TR7; as she struggled to get in ( biggish girl ) she said " god you need to be an extortionist to get into one of these things
Tomassi Posted 3 August 2006 Posted 3 August 2006 mate: did you know your bag is made from cow? gf: no its not, its made from leather
Daggers Posted 3 August 2006 Posted 3 August 2006 "Can you get me a total figure for the conveyancing cost?" says me... ..."Carole, can you give this gentleman a ball-point figure?"
lcfcalan Posted 3 August 2006 Posted 3 August 2006 Sitting in the pub one night (as you do) and we were debating whether to go to the geyhound stadium the following weekend . 'So are we going to the dogs or what' says I 'I'll come dogging with you' says my sister inlaw . Oh how we laughed .
billabob Posted 3 August 2006 Posted 3 August 2006 Not so much what my gf has said but he geography is just so bad, for instance; "isnt Brazil in Africa?" "isnt the USA a continent" "china's an island i tell you" and they go on and on and on!
DanTheFoxBhoy Posted 4 August 2006 Posted 4 August 2006 Me: "I have a do on at parliament tonight." Girl mate: "Oh, what's parliament?" Me: "You know... where the... parliamentarians are?" Girl mate: "Oh okay. What do they do?"
macbeth Posted 4 August 2006 Posted 4 August 2006 http://www.geocities.com/kurtodrome/english/dumb.html see private eye's dumb britain
Katy Posted 4 August 2006 Posted 4 August 2006 Tis a good job me and Lease never do owt silly like that isn't it Leesoh???
Robsdee Posted 4 August 2006 Posted 4 August 2006 I have blonde days occasionally, something to do with the moon me thinks. I always thought Anglesey (sp?) was in Scotland? Didn't know until about 10 years ago that birds, chickens etc had sex, thought they just laid eggs and the male sat on them..............that's after having 2 children myself..........doh!!!!!!
Stuliasz Posted 4 August 2006 Posted 4 August 2006 I kid you not... "The Great Wall of China isn't in Japan?"
Knighton Matt Posted 4 August 2006 Author Posted 4 August 2006 I kid you not... "The Great Wall of China isn't in Japan?" :w00t:
The People's Hero Posted 4 August 2006 Posted 4 August 2006 I've got some classics to share with you when I've got about 10 minutes to type them all out. Watch this space (especially you Fezzler - you'll like these)
Manwell Pablo Posted 4 August 2006 Posted 4 August 2006 Bit of a bizzare one really not that funny just plain stupidity. Mates GF: When was this song released Me: 1996 Mates GF: Just think we we're eight years old when this was released Me: No....... we were in year eight when this was released GF: Oh yeah.
Guest Posted 4 August 2006 Posted 4 August 2006 Tis a good job me and Lease never do owt silly like that isn't it Leesoh??? If I do, it's for comic effect.
Fez of Mahrez Posted 4 August 2006 Posted 4 August 2006 Once convinced one of my mates that beef came from donkeys to the point where we had to say that the public were not au fait with this particular nugget of information, thus you couldn't see any donkey farms in Essex (where she comes from.........yeah I know). So then she rings up her mate and asks where beef comes from. We think "damnit, the game's up". Her mate replies "cows, of course" at which point she turns to us and says.... "ha, see, I'm not stupid, she thought it came from cows too!" Said girl also thought the Isle of Wight was off the coast of Scotland and that Australia was in Europe (after much confusion we worked out she meant Austria). Said girl graduated from Leicester University with a 2:1 in Law.
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