Daggers Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Can I park in my drive? No. Why? Because this uphisorherownarsetwat has parked across my drive for the last two hours!
Manwell Pablo Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Can I park in my drive? No. Why? Because this uphisorherownarsetwat has parked across my drive for the last two hours! Break window. Hand break off Watch your troubles roll away
The People's Hero Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Would be a crying shame if those headlamps were to be kicked in.
Master Fox Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 I think i would actually have to smash that car up with a baseball bat. What's written on the piece of paper attached the windscreen wiper?
The People's Hero Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 About 3 or 4 months ago, some idiot from my road parked across my drive (he was having a bit of a gathering and wanted all the space he could get). I get home, he's parked across my drive, so I parked IN his drive. He didn't see the funny side of that at all.
Head Honcho Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 A couple of frailties on a motor: Tyres-slash em Wing mirrors-break em off Windscreen-smash it Paintwork-scratch it Not that I'd advocate such behaviour, but personally when the twat comes back after parking it outside my house like that they'd find a few alterations to the motor.
Daggers Posted 15 February 2007 Author Posted 15 February 2007 What's written on the piece of paper attached the windscreen wiper? Dear Driver, Unfortunately I can not park my car as you are blocking my driveway. Can you please knock on No.141 to let me know when I can move my car? Thank you, Sue
Manwell Pablo Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Dear Driver, Unfortunately I can not park my car as you are blocking my driveway. Can you please knock on No.141 to let me know when I can move my car? Thank you, Sue Has she got the rolling pin waiting Dave? Is she going to open a can of whoop ass eh Dave?
Head Honcho Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Dear Driver, Unfortunately I can not park my car as you are blocking my driveway. Can you please knock on No.141 to let me know when I can move my car? Thank you, Sue Can't you somehow double park next to the car? So preventing them from leaving and when they knock on your door just ignore them for an hour or so.
Manwell Pablo Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 About 3 or 4 months ago, some idiot from my road parked across my drive (he was having a bit of a gathering and wanted all the space he could get). I get home, he's parked across my drive, so I parked IN his drive. He didn't see the funny side of that at all. Thats hilarious
Daggers Posted 15 February 2007 Author Posted 15 February 2007 Has she got the rolling pin waiting Dave? Is she going to open a can of whoop ass eh Dave? Amazingly, Bird is not in the house at present and so Driver is in for one almighty shock when I open the door...in an unBirdlike manner. In honour of Fez's thread ~ I may well use the ' put your dukes up' phrase.
Head Honcho Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Amazingly, Bird is not in the house at present and so Driver is in for one almighty shock when I open the door...in an unBirdlike manner. In honour of Fez's thread ~ I may well use the ' put your dukes up' phrase. Is that the tax disc halfway across the windscreen? I'll bet there's no MOT on it! Try ringing the law and tell them there's a car causing an obstruction they'll then do a check on it. You can also try ringing and say that some boy racers have dumped it there and it needs to be removed.
Daggers Posted 15 February 2007 Author Posted 15 February 2007 Thats hilarious The last bloke that did it returned to his car to find me sitting on it. He went absolutely mental...disgusting behaviour he said!
Daggers Posted 15 February 2007 Author Posted 15 February 2007 Try ringing the law... Considering my probable behaviour when the owner arrives, I think it is best if the Police are kept out of it
The People's Hero Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Thats hilarious It backfired the next day when I wanted my car and by then there were cars everywhere blocking me in, on his drive. All his hungover party-goers didn't start leaving till around 3/4 pm. Had to get my girlfriend to act as chauffeur that day, a harrowing experience. I have another few interesting 'car' stories in my road actually. One good one is that my sister is so bad at driving that she can't drive off our drive without mashing up next door's flowerbed. I joked that they should put up a small wall or some picket fencing or something. They've only gone and done it haven't they?! It's only a matter of time before my sister scratches her car up a treat. My favourite though was around Christmas time (early December I suppose) when an elderly couple came up to the church (on our cul de sac) parked on our garden (for fook's sake) and then started cutting holly off our holly bush thing! I had a word and so they moved... on to the grassy land in front of our house (it's ours - we look after it, I cut it etc etc). They then go to church. For a joke my mum, sister and I put our cars round it and due to our 3 cars and the tree, those people were left waiting around for ages to leave. When I went out to talk to them, they started calling me UnChristian (with a large C I hope) and all sorts. I retorted that the more you talk about God and Jesus, evidently the less you have to act as they would like. They went and fetched the vicar, who lives in my road. By this time, I had moved my car. I then took a torrent of abuse from the vicar. For a holy man, he used some pretty unholy words. This is a man who couldn't understand why I didn't like someone parking on our garden, pinching our holly and then parking on our other bit of land... whilst he himself has been known to moan at me for such things as 'having an alarm on my car' (well keep the fu ck away from it then), driving in a noisy manner (sorry mate, we can't all afford Lexus), listening to music (suppose hymns would be better) and coming back at all hours of the night.... (get this next bit)... with my lights on! What a cu nt! Anyway, it's all fun and games in my road. One final story. I got a bollocking off our next door neighbours last night. Their 2 kids and the one from the other side were missing about in this skip outside their house with building debris, tree branches, broken furniture etc. Anyway, I'm suddenly aware they are piling bricks behind the wheels of my car. I went out and set my alarm and just waited, sure as night is dark, they eventually touched the fu cker and boy did they sh it themselves. I stood outside my front door and laughed noisily. Apparently that was unreasonable behaviour. Good job I'm moving out soon methinks.
Manwell Pablo Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Considering my probable behaviour when the owner arrives, I think it is best if the Police are kept out of it Assuming he falls for your little note, I certainly wouldn't. Mind you I'm not stupid enough to park across someones drive either.
Rincewind Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Get in touch with a wheel clamping company. Let the tyres down. Call a garage ask them to scrap it.
The People's Hero Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Get a load of your mates round. Pick it up. Move it. When the owner returns, claim you know nothing about it, with a knowing smile. Then kill him.. or her. It's bound to be a her.
Daggers Posted 15 February 2007 Author Posted 15 February 2007 Assuming he falls for your little note, I certainly wouldn't. Mind you I'm not stupid enough to park across someones drive either. My desk faces out onto the driveway. I'm waiting...
Simi Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Spray paint his car with a 'word' of your choice.
Daggers Posted 15 February 2007 Author Posted 15 February 2007 Spray paint his car with a 'word' of your choice. COOK PASS BABTRIDGE
Scarby Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Get in touch with a wheel clamping company. Let the tyres down. Call a garage ask them to scrap it. it will never get moved if you do that
The People's Hero Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Paint some double yellow lines next to his car. Ring the police. Meh.
Head Honcho Posted 15 February 2007 Posted 15 February 2007 Looking at the state of the car I'll bet a pound to a penny it's a chavmobile
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