SOCCERROO FOX Posted 13 February 2011 Posted 13 February 2011 I'm a Paramedic, 25 years man and boy ! By and large I enjoy it, apart from knobhead calls from drunken idiots and people who can't be fookin arsed to try looking after themselves or can't wait till morning to phone a doctor, or go to the chemists or think they're dying when they have flu or imagine a simple nosebleed will result in death (dont pinch the hard part of your nose, pinch the soft bit so your nostrils are shut, dickhead). EDIT ABOVE: I don't mean those unfortunate to have a clotting disorder BTW Have had a fair smattering of interesting and humourous calls too, so it's karma and all that. Used to be a club DJ in the late 70' early 80's... now THAT was fun Do you ever fear for you safety or been attacked trying to help someone?
FoxyPV Posted 13 February 2011 Posted 13 February 2011 Yes it is, that's why I only mentioned 'flu If we go to someone with Manflu we alert the A+E and have the Consultant Manfluologist on standby who will tell you Manflu is a dire condition requiring immediate tea and sympathy and un-interrupted sport on TV. (by definition it has to be a man, female 'fluologists have yet to succeed in this field due complete lack of understanding of the condition and its side effects, such as near-death moaning, looking hang-dog, paralysis of the spine when lying on any soft, flat surface, RCCHS... Remote Control Claw Hand Syndrome and an inexplicable desire for bacon butties) <_< This is a public service announcement. Man Flu - The Facts... 1. Man-Flu is more painful than childbirth. This is an irrefutable scientific fact*. *(Based on a survey of over 100,000 men.) 2. Man-Flu is not 'just a cold'. It is a condition so severe that the germs from a single Man-Flu sneeze could wipe out entire tribes of people living in the rainforest. And probably loads of monkeys too. 3. Women do not contract Man-Flu. At worst they suffer from what is medically recognised as a 'Mild Girly Sniffle' – which, if a man caught, he would still be able to run, throw a ball, tear the phone book in half and compete in all other kinds of manly activities. 4. Men do not 'moan' when they have Man-Flu. They emit involuntary groans of agony that are entirely in proportion to the unbearable pain they are in. 5. Full recovery from Man-Flu will take place much quicker if their simple requests for care, sympathy and regular cups of tea are met. Is that really so much to ask? Florence Nightingale would have done it 6. More men die each year from MFN (Man-Flu Neglect) than lots and lots of other things. (Like rabbit attacks or choking on toast). 7. Men suffering from Man-Flu want nothing more than to get out of bed and come to work, but they are too selfless to risk spreading this awful condition amongst their friends and colleagues. In this sense, they are the greatest heroes this country has ever known. 8. In 1982 scientists managed to simulate the agonising symptoms of full blown Man-Flu in a female chimp. She became so ill that her head literally fell off. 9. Man-Flu germs are more powerful than He-Man, The Thundercats and The A-Team combined. They are too strong for weak, nasty tasting 'lady medicines' like Lemsip, so don't bother trying to force them on a victim of Man-Flu. 10. While it may seem like a Man-Flu sufferer is just lying around enjoying 'Diagnosis Murder' it is a commonly recognised medical fact that the exact pitch and frequency of Dick Van Dyke's voice has remarkable soothing powers. Every minute in this country one man is struck down by Man-Flu. Women, all we ask is that each of you offers them a cup of tea, some kind words and your undivided attention and care. Then maybe, just maybe, we'll beat this monstrous disease together.
Parafox Posted 16 February 2011 Posted 16 February 2011 Do you ever fear for you safety or been attacked trying to help someone? Hi Roo, sorry for not replying sooner to this. Yes I do fear for my safety on some occasions and I and quite a few of my colleagues have been attacked whilst trying to help someone. On more than one occasion I have been spat in my face. Another example was one time I went to a "collapsed" male at a private address, as I was kneeling on the floor trying to assess him his mother (yes mother) came barrelling into the room with a kitchen knife in each hand and jumped me. I got her off but she effectively held me hostage for 20 mins until help arrived. She was later arrested and detained under the Mental Health Act. I have had to fend off a guy coming at me and my crew-mate by throwing his push-bike at him! I have been assaulted in the street by a patient's friend whilst I was being escorted by a police officer! Some unbelievable stuff happens from time to time. Makes for a less than dull occupation though !!
Zingari Posted 16 February 2011 Posted 16 February 2011 Hi Roo, sorry for not replying sooner to this. Yes I do fear for my safety on some occasions and I and quite a few of my colleagues have been attacked whilst trying to help someone. On more than one occasion I have been spat in my face. Another example was one time I went to a "collapsed" male at a private address, as I was kneeling on the floor trying to assess him his mother (yes mother) came barrelling into the room with a kitchen knife in each hand and jumped me. I got her off but she effectively held me hostage for 20 mins until help arrived. She was later arrested and detained under the Mental Health Act. I have had to fend off a guy coming at me and my crew-mate by throwing his push-bike at him! I have been assaulted in the street by a patient's friend whilst I was being escorted by a police officer! Some unbelievable stuff happens from time to time. Makes for a less than dull occupation though !! they may have been traumatized by something in their past, such as a "flashing" Mick Jagger
Bob Weasel Fox Posted 16 February 2011 Posted 16 February 2011 I'm a Paramedic, 25 years man and boy ! By and large I enjoy it, apart from knobhead calls from drunken idiots and people who can't be fookin arsed to try looking after themselves or can't wait till morning to phone a doctor, or go to the chemists or think they're dying when they have flu or imagine a simple nosebleed will result in death (dont pinch the hard part of your nose, pinch the soft bit so your nostrils are shut, dickhead). EDIT ABOVE: I don't mean those unfortunate to have a clotting disorder BTW Have had a fair smattering of interesting and humourous calls too, so it's karma and all that. Used to be a club DJ in the late 70' early 80's... now THAT was fun First of all - Thank you for doing a brilliant but mostly unrewarded job, secondly how do you get on with the Police officers you come into contact with? (i have a couple of friends who are coppers and i know Zoe (i think Fillimore?) paramedic a little bit also)
Parafox Posted 16 February 2011 Posted 16 February 2011 they may have been traumatized by something in their past, such as a "flashing" Mick Jagger I would like to point out that the pen*s wasn't mine !! And i was wearing a mask... Oh dear, it sounds even worse now
Bob Weasel Fox Posted 16 February 2011 Posted 16 February 2011 I would like to point out that the pen*s wasn't mine !! And i was wearing a mask... Oh dear, it sounds even worse now See last item on page 9 buddy
Parafox Posted 16 February 2011 Posted 16 February 2011 See last item on page 9 buddy Carlito Thank you for your comments, I appreciate them. Without fail, the police officers I have had contact with have been exemplary. They support us fully in what we do. I have seen many many situations where they have had to deal with less than pleasant people and those in distress and have, to a man (and woman) been fair but firm where necessary, sympathetic to those in need, good humoured and professional. What's really ipressive though, is when we have to gain entry and the ARU turn up with weapons on. (they are the only unit as far as i know, to have the door-breaker) I did ask them once to shoot the lock off but they declined. Boo !! Undoubtedly there will be those on here who have had a bad experience who won't agree with me, but I dont speak for them. Yes, Zoe is a (hot) Paramedic
Bob Weasel Fox Posted 16 February 2011 Posted 16 February 2011 Carlito Thank you for your comments, I appreciate them. Without fail, the police officers I have had contact with have been exemplary. They support us fully in what we do. I have seen many many situations where they have had to deal with less than pleasant people and those in distress and have, to a man (and woman) been fair but firm where necessary, sympathetic to those in need, good humoured and professional. What's really ipressive though, is when we have to gain entry and the ARU turn up with weapons on. (they are the only unit as far as i know, to have the door-breaker) I did ask them once to shoot the lock off but they declined. Boo !! Undoubtedly there will be those on here who have had a bad experience who won't agree with me, but I dont speak for them. Yes, Zoe is a (hot) Paramedic As im married to a Zoe (not that one ) i decline to comment on your last line (whisper it while my wife is not about but hell yes!!!!)
SOCCERROO FOX Posted 16 February 2011 Posted 16 February 2011 Hi Roo, sorry for not replying sooner to this. Yes I do fear for my safety on some occasions and I and quite a few of my colleagues have been attacked whilst trying to help someone. On more than one occasion I have been spat in my face. Another example was one time I went to a "collapsed" male at a private address, as I was kneeling on the floor trying to assess him his mother (yes mother) came barrelling into the room with a kitchen knife in each hand and jumped me. I got her off but she effectively held me hostage for 20 mins until help arrived. She was later arrested and detained under the Mental Health Act. I have had to fend off a guy coming at me and my crew-mate by throwing his push-bike at him! I have been assaulted in the street by a patient's friend whilst I was being escorted by a police officer! Some unbelievable stuff happens from time to time. Makes for a less than dull occupation though !! Same happens over here it is truly astonishing. Keep up the good work
General Smuts Posted 17 February 2011 Posted 17 February 2011 As of an hour ago i am now a Sales Executive for a plastics company. Basically Dunder Mifflin with plastic not paper. Johnny Quest thinks im a sellout.
SOCCERROO FOX Posted 17 February 2011 Posted 17 February 2011 Does the office have a Dwight Schrute? No but the rumour is they just hired one today!
hebangsthedrums Posted 17 February 2011 Posted 17 February 2011 'Dots on maps' - in the franchising dept of an automotive manufacturer
Sparky Posted 17 February 2011 Posted 17 February 2011 Window, door and Conservatory fitter. NOT an electrician !!
MikeyT Posted 2 April 2011 Posted 2 April 2011 Window, door and Conservatory fitter. NOT an electrician !! Why would we think you were an electrician?
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