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Christoph

The, 'what do you do' thread

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Posted

I did A-Levels and applied for University but decided to join the RAF as an ICT specialist, only done a year and half but if you want any advice PM me :thumbup:

Whilst having a quick look at the RAF careers website I came across this little gem:

If you are colour blind, you will not be able to join the RAF as a Photographer.

lol

Posted

Whilst having a quick look at the RAF careers website I came across this little gem:

lol

I did council work as a summer job with the tree surgeons and one of the other agency workers there had formerly worked as a RAF photographer. Judging by the fact he was doing agency work instead in couldnt have been that interesting

Posted

I'm a recruitment consultant specialising in the recruitment of Business Intelligence and Management Reporting Systems Professionals. (I learnt that line on day 1 of the job).....

Posted

Sarbanes–Oxley

Enough said...

I didnt realise SOX was still going strong!!!! or at least, I assumed that most Sarbanes-Oxley implementations would be well embedded by now.

Posted

I didnt realise SOX was still going strong!!!! or at least, I assumed that most Sarbanes-Oxley implementations would be well embedded by now.

The downside (actually one of many) of working for a company with their Headquarters in the US.

I'd say 80% of what I do is black ops and 20% I actually fill in pieces of paper to keep the auditors happy.

Which recruitment company do you work for?

Posted

The downside (actually one of many) of working for a company with their Headquarters in the US.

I'd say 80% of what I do is black ops and 20% I actually fill in pieces of paper to keep the auditors happy.

Which recruitment company do you work for?

"grew up" working for Hays, ironically, specialising in Internal Audit, Operational Risk and Sox Roles, and now I work for an organisation called SystemsAccountants. probably not a huge need to explain what we recruit for as a company here ;)

Posted

"grew up" working for Hays, ironically, specialising in Internal Audit, Operational Risk and Sox Roles, and now I work for an organisation called SystemsAccountants. probably not a huge need to explain what we recruit for as a company here ;)

I guess it's only interesting if you work as an IT Business Analyst, specialising in Business Intelligence Systems, for a global Recruitment Company (that really isn't a joke lol )

OK - for the sake of everyone else I'll stop asking questions.

Posted

A-levels doing geography, business studies and religious studies. work casual as a lifeguard at braunstone leisure centre, so if you ask nicely i can get you in for free :thumbup:

Posted

I'm a Financial Information and Support Advisor at Swansea University!

The job can be really rewarding when dealing with people who really need some help but most of the time I deal with students who piss their money up the wall and then come crying because their student loans aren't enough to pay for everything!!

Posted

I'm Corporate Sales Manager for Europe's largest independent Print and Document Process Solutions provider - sounds really grand but still wish I was either a professional sportsperson or retired !

Guest BlueBrett
Posted
Electrician, apprentice. Part-time LCFC scout.

In your role as scout do you work with a really fat bloke who absolutely stinks? Can't remember his name but he used to come in the betting shop I worked in and I never really believed him. His name may have started with a G but I'm not sure.

Posted

In your role as scout do you work with a really fat bloke who absolutely stinks? Can't remember his name but he used to come in the betting shop I worked in and I never really believed him. His name may have started with a G but I'm not sure.

Yeah he's a scout, he goes in Ladbrokes in Loughborough. He smells like he hasnt cleaned his cock in years.

Guest BlueBrett
Posted
Yeah he's a scout, he goes in Ladbrokes in Loughborough. He smells like he hasnt cleaned his cock in years.

He does doesn't he? In all my life I'm sure I have never come across someone who smells as musty and horrible as that guy. You literally have to hold you breath every time you go within 6 feet of him :S

Posted

I'm a Paramedic, 25 years man and boy ! By and large I enjoy it, apart from knobhead calls from drunken idiots

and people who can't be fookin arsed to try looking after themselves

or can't wait till morning to phone a doctor, or go to the chemists

or think they're dying when they have flu

or imagine a simple nosebleed will result in death (dont pinch the hard part of your nose, pinch the soft bit so your nostrils are shut, dickhead).

EDIT ABOVE: I don't mean those unfortunate to have a clotting disorder BTW

Have had a fair smattering of interesting and humourous calls too, so it's karma and all that.

Used to be a club DJ in the late 70' early 80's... now THAT was fun

Posted

I'm a Paramedic, 25 years man and boy ! By and large I enjoy it, apart from knobhead calls from drunken idiots

and people who can't be fookin arsed to try looking after themselves

or can't wait till morning to phone a doctor, or go to the chemists

or think they're dying when they have flu

or imagine a simple nosebleed will result in death (dont pinch the hard part of your nose, pinch the soft bit so your nostrils are shut, dickhead).

EDIT ABOVE: I don't mean those unfortunate to have a clotting disorder BTW

Have had a fair smattering of interesting and humourous calls too, so it's karma and all that.

Used to be a club DJ in the late 70' early 80's... now THAT was fun

Manflu is the most serious illness known to humanity.

Posted

Manflu is the most serious illness known to humanity.

Yes it is, that's why I only mentioned 'flu

If we go to someone with Manflu we alert the A+E and have the Consultant Manfluologist on standby who will tell you Manflu is a dire condition requiring immediate tea and sympathy and un-interrupted sport on TV.

(by definition it has to be a man, female 'fluologists have yet to succeed in this field due complete lack of understanding of the condition and its side effects, such as near-death moaning, looking hang-dog, paralysis of the spine when lying on any soft, flat surface, RCCHS... Remote Control Claw Hand Syndrome and an inexplicable desire for bacon butties)

<_<

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