Parafox Posted 6 April 2011 Posted 6 April 2011 I have some time on my hands... watched 6 episodes of PN last night , reminded me how sharp the script was... [talking about the inflatable Penis] Jerry St Clair: We're not having that. Brian Potter: You're damn right Jerry, we're not having that go on take it back. Dodgy Eric: But Brian... Brian Potter: It's a family fun day man, there's kiddies running around. They can't go jumping up and down on a love length Young Kenny: Can't we disguise it? Brian Potter: Yeah we can, we'll put a wooly hat on it and say it's you. Dodgy Eric: It's not what it looks Brian. Brian Potter: Not what it looks. Not what it looks!!! It's a twenty-foot cock and balls man. It don't look like nothing else, it's not happening. Alan: Song lyrics make the best chat up lines, heaven's missing an angel... If I told you you had a lovely body would you hold it against me, that kind of stuff. Max: I don't know who you are, but you're a real dead ringer for love. Who sang that? Paddy: Meat Loaf. Young Kenny: What about, everywhere you go, you always take the weather with you. Paddy: For Jesus' sake Max: How's that Viagra working? What flavour did you get? Paddy: I got Aniseed flavour, it doesn't appear to be doing much, nothing stirring downstairs yet anyway. How's the diving watch? Max: It's good. Right now, right now, this watch says that I'm out of Oxygen. That can't be right can it? Fireman (after the club burnt down) Looks as though it was a discarded fag. Lesley: What's happened? Brian Potter: Some queer's burnt me club down lesley.
Parafox Posted 6 April 2011 Author Posted 6 April 2011 Brian (looking at some "vertically challenged" blokes getting out of a mini-bus outside the club) How far away are they? At the Singles Night: Paddy: "Who's that?" Les: "That's Young Mary, Mary's daughter" Paddy: "I didn't know she had children" Les: "Yeah, she's got two - Mary, and Joseph - Joseph's at the College doing a BTEC in Carpentry". The lyrics from the Bin Bag song.. (Jerry StClair is the greeter for Asda after the club burnt down) To the tune "Forget Me Nots" by Patrice Rushen, (was also sampled in a george micheal song) Come and get your black bin bags They're on offer till December Come and get your black bin bags They're long and black and slender Heavy duty black bin bags No matter what your gender Heavy duty black bin bags Whether bi or straight or bender
Mark Posted 6 April 2011 Posted 6 April 2011 My favourite scene http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXHtokQ2bxc
rico Posted 6 April 2011 Posted 6 April 2011 My favourite scene http://www.youtube.c...h?v=sXHtokQ2bxc "He's 8 miles high! He's gangster trippin'," Brilliant One of my faves is Brian to Young Kenny when talking about disguising the inflatable penis " Yeah,we could stick a hat on it and call it you! "
I am Rod Hull Posted 6 April 2011 Posted 6 April 2011 Must watch the series again... Class... My link
The Padster Posted 6 April 2011 Posted 6 April 2011 Paddy: Prostitutes are rough in Amsterdam. First one I went with, made me wash me old man in t'sink Max: You took your dad? Class.
rico Posted 6 April 2011 Posted 6 April 2011 Maxs' car alarm "Get back you bastards,i'll break your legs"
Ozwin Posted 6 April 2011 Posted 6 April 2011 I've never heard of either of these shows. Literally havn't lived. The outakes for both shows are hilarious. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zl5_Hq18SRQ&feature=related http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zBjW-fGgbjs&feature=player_detailpage#t=110s Tommy DICK fingers.
BoneDog Posted 6 April 2011 Posted 6 April 2011 Brian is in bed and slams the phone down after the prank call from Max and Paddy shouting to himself : "SICK.....ANIMALS......LAUGHIN AT DEATH......HALF PAST THREE IN THE BLOODY MORNIN..........BLOODY WORLD'S GONE MAD." Phone rings again - real call from the police : Brian answers - "WHO IS THIS? HELLO?" Copper - "Mr Potter? Er this is Sergeant Patterson...I'm ringing regarding a break-in at your club." Brian - "OHHHHHHH.....BREAK-IN NOW IS IT EH?.....WHO'S BROKE IN?......THE BLOODY FIRE BRIGADE?......IT BURNT DOWN A MINUTE AGO YOU SICK BASTARDS." Copper - "I beg your pardon?" Brian - "DO YA?....WELL COP FOR THIS....(((does a loud fart down the phone)))....GOODNIGHT." Slams down phone. Then cut to next scene - Brian sitting outside club with policeman "Thanks again for coming officer." First time I saw that I was crying for about 5 minutes! Edit : Just seen it's been posted as one of the clips above.
rico Posted 6 April 2011 Posted 6 April 2011 I can honestly say I've never watched it / them. watch them,honestly,you'll be howling at some of the situations they get themselves into
I am Rod Hull Posted 6 April 2011 Posted 6 April 2011 Literally havn't lived. The outakes for both shows are hilarious. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zl5_Hq18SRQ&feature=related http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zBjW-fGgbjs&feature=player_detailpage#t=110s Tommy DICK fingers. Burnley wallet.. Forgot how good it was.. Im getting me boxset out tomorrow..
Big Ol' Bob Posted 7 April 2011 Posted 7 April 2011 "...And I'll do your dentist a favour and knock them bastards out" Max And Paddy Road to nowhere...
rico Posted 7 April 2011 Posted 7 April 2011 Hoss Cartwright: "Aye up Brian,whats happened to your legs?last time i seen you,you could walk!" Brian:"Never mind my legs,what's happened to your head?last time i seen you,you had hair!! Hoss then attempts to adjust the wig on his head
Cat Burger Posted 7 April 2011 Posted 7 April 2011 Jerry: What's your name son? Student: Stu... Jerry: What's Stu short for? Stupid?
rico Posted 7 April 2011 Posted 7 April 2011 Jerry: What's your name son? Student: Stu... Jerry: What's Stu short for? Stupid? ha ha,in that same scene "What have you come as? an extra from Tenko?"
Parafox Posted 7 April 2011 Author Posted 7 April 2011 Max: I almost threw her out for being Under age... Paddy: Under age? How old was she you dirty dog? Max: No, she was old enough it was just that she was, she was a kind of midget. Paddy: Ain't that a Queen song? Max: No you clown... Paddy: You mean she was a dwarf? Max: No she wasn't a dwarf, she was a midget. Paddy: There's no difference... Max: There is actually! Mr Politically Incorrect. Dwarfs for your information are in the circus and do cartwheels. Midgets are like normal people just shrunk down. Paddy: Well you live and learn.
Parafox Posted 7 April 2011 Author Posted 7 April 2011 Brian plans to re-open the burnt down club... Brian... Bigger, better, faster, stronger, rising out of the ashes. A superclub, a King of clubs only this time we’ll have it all. A restaurant, a bistro, a sarolium (sic)- we’ll serve food. Jerry.,.. Food eh? Brian Potter... Yes Jerry, but not just any old food. Proper food - scampi, chicken Kievs, garlic bread Max... Garlic bread? Brian... Yes Max, garlic bread. It's the future, I've tasted it
lildave3 Posted 7 April 2011 Posted 7 April 2011 Watched the first and second series over the past week, quite odd that this thread has suddnely popped up! Actually amazing show. So many quotes that are just too funny, too many to remember.
rico Posted 8 April 2011 Posted 8 April 2011 Watched the first and second series over the past week, quite odd that this thread has suddnely popped up! Actually amazing show. So many quotes that are just too funny, too many to remember. The thing about these series were,it wasn't just the dialogue,it was also some of the visual things that also made it so funny hard to believe that they're 10 years old now !
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