What grinds my gears...

[The Year Of The Fox]

Sorry Al, but that is actually quite funny.

Few highlights of pranks I have heard about:

• Opening the bottom of a can of beans and placing the can on a housemate's bedside table. Simply wait for the housemate to wonder what a can of Heinz' finest is doing on his bedside table, try to take it back to the kitchen and await the sudden outburst of Tourettes.
  
• The classic clingfilm round the toilet gag. Never gets old.
  
• Police tape round the house.
  
• Liquitabs hidden between the mattress and bed frame. We all sit on our bed from time to time, nobody's safe.
  
• Wait for a housemate to fall asleep, squat over his face and ask a friend to wake him up suddenly. Shoots up, face full of arse.
  

Immature? Probably. Funny? Absobloodylutely.

My old boss got into a habit of cracking his hardboiled egg on his dashboard whilst driving. Done it religiously for a few weeks til his old apprentice swapped the boiled one for a fresh!

[Corky]

I can see why it might be funny, but I do get pissed off very easily, and it just wasn't a good time - not when I've just woken up, mouth dry as the sahara and craving a fried egg sandwich.

You should crave bacon.

Like I do.

[The Doctor]

I disagree with the Clingfilm toilet gag - over-done now. But yeah, they sound like they could have been funny. Incredibly irritating if you were on the receiving end mind.

[SOCCERROO FOX]

I can see why it might be funny, but I do get pissed off very easily, and it just wasn't a good time - not when I've just woken up, mouth dry as the sahara and craving a fried egg sandwich.

[NeilyBoy]

I'm a fan of the missing bed prank: Wait 'til a housemate goes away for a bit and move his bed into somebody else's flat. Classic.

Also fun is turning every item of furniture in their room upside-down.

Oh and if someone passes out during a night of festivities: get everyone together huddled as closely around them as possible and scream into their face as loudly as you can. Traumatic for them but hilarious for everyone else.

[AoWW]

I can see why it might be funny, but I do get pissed off very easily, and it just wasn't a good time - not when I've just woken up, mouth dry as the sahara and craving a fried egg sandwich.

Couldn't you have just popped one in the microwave to defrost?

[I am Rod Hull]

Scotch eggs?

Anyway... I know a bloke who had his false teeth frozen in the glass of water he`d left them in, by his grand kids when on holiday in Spain....

Edited 22 March 2012 by WTF BBQ

[Haydos]

This was my living room in halls one day when I got back from uni, Mum was coming to pick me up to go home for xmas like an hour later.

Clothes in the kitchen cupboards, food in my wardrobe, toiletries in the sink, plates and cutlery in the shower. Arghhh.

[NeilyBoy]

Driving to the airport to pick up my mum and I reach a 90(km/h) zone exiting the motorway, but get stuck behind some moron going at 50. 50?!

Oh and while I'm venting about driving: I was parked, trying to rejoin traffic the other day. The stretch of road I was on had lights at the end so there was a queue of cars that I had to join. Luckily the spot where I was parked coincided with the end of the queue, meaning that the simple act of pulling out of my spot would put me harmlessly on the end. I engage the engine, turn on my blinkers and start pulling out only for some tart approaching in the distance to decide that she doesn't want to be one car farther down the queue so she floors it, damn near ploughing right into the side of me, already well into the manoeuvre. Anyway, I gestured angrily at her for being such a retard and she returns in kind, but I took my place in the queue and spent the remaining time waiting for the lights to change with my middle finger pointed firmly in her direction before slooowly approaching the lights so that they turned amber just as I reached them, leaving her stuck at another red.

She was pretty hot too, which would explain her sense of entitlement and shitty driving etiquette. (That and she was a woman. And Belgian.)

[21st Century Fox]

My friend once told me a good one, firstly he wiped marmite all over his housemates bed so when he brought a girl back it obviously looked like his bed was covered in skid marks. So in retaliation his friend left some gay porn magazines next to his bed with some scrunched up tissues for when my friends girlfriend came round. My friends cote de grace was to get his housemates margarine out of the fridge, place a small nugget of shit on top of it, microwave it so the margarine melts and the shit sinks, put it back in the fridge so it re-solidified and waited till the next time his housemate had toast.

Edited 22 March 2012 by 21st Century Fox

[NeilyBoy]

People using foreign words incorrectly/getting foreign words wrong: It's a coup (strike) de grace (elegance). Cote means side, or coast depending on context - I'm sure you didn't mean your mate had an elegant body of water.

But what a coup de grace.

[Saxondale]

My friend once told me a good one, firstly he wiped marmite all over his housemates bed so when he brought a girl back it obviously looked like his bed was covered in skid marks. So in retaliation his friend left some gay porn magazines next to his bed with some scrunched up tissues for when my friends girlfriend came round. My friends cote de grace was to get his housemates margarine out of the fridge, place a small nugget of shit on top of it, microwave it so the margarine melts and the shit sinks, put it back in the fridge so it re-solidified and waited till the next time his housemate had toast.

This is a classic example of how practical jokes can escalate.

Al, take heed before planning your revenge!

[Saxondale]

People using foreign words incorrectly/getting foreign words wrong: It's a coup (strike) de grace (elegance). Cote means side, or coast depending on context - I'm sure you didn't mean your mate had an elegant body of water.

But what a coup de grace.

Tut tut, if you're going to correct people, get it right! Grâce in this context would mean mercy.

[NeilyBoy]

Tut tut, if you're going to correct people, get it right! Grâce in this context would mean mercy.

No it wouldn't. It's a phrase to describe something truly great, not something truly good at showing pity. You get it right.

[Saxondale]

No it wouldn't. It's a phrase to describe something truly great, not something truly good at showing pity. You get it right.

grâce /ɡʀɑs/

feminine noun

(de geste, personne) grace;

(de paysage) charm;

(de style) elegance;

sans ~ [geste] ungraceful;

[style] inelegant;

se mouvoir avec/sans ~ to move gracefully/awkwardly;

(volonté) bonne/mauvaise ~ good/bad grace;

de bonne/mauvaise ~ willingly/grudgingly;

(faveur) favour (British spelling);

chercher/gagner les bonnes ~s de qn to seek/to win sb's favour (British spelling);

faire à qn la ~ d'accepter fml to do sb the honour (British spelling) of accepting;

à la ~ de Dieu! it's in God's hands!;

de ~ fml please;

(avec impatience) for pity's sake;

donner le coup de ~ à qn lit, fig to deal sb the death blow;

ce fut le coup de ~ that was the final stroke;

(pardon) mercy;

Jur (free) pardon;

demander/crier ~ to beg/to cry for mercy;

~ présidentielle Jur presidential pardon;

~! (have) mercy!;

je vous fais ~ des détails I'll spare you the details;

(bonté divine) grace;

être touché par la ~ to be touched by God's grace;

~ à Dieu! thank God!;

dire les ~s to say grace (after a meal).

Sorry, it's not pasted the formatting well.

[NeilyBoy]

Confused by your post I did my own quick search:

"coup de grâce (k d gräs)

n. pl. coups de grâce (k)

1.

A deathblow delivered to end the misery of a mortally wounded victim.

2.

A finishing stroke or decisive event."

I sure feel like a dick right now.

[Saxondale]

Confused by your post I did my own quick search:

"coup de grâce(k d gräs)

n. pl. coups de grâce (k)

1.

A deathblow delivered to end the misery of a mortally wounded victim.

2.

A finishing stroke or decisive event."

I sure feel like a dick right now.

Every day's a school day, so they say!

Edit: I don't think putting shit in the guy's margarine would have necessarily put him out of his misery, mind!

Edited 23 March 2012 by BornBlue

[The Doctor]

Couldn't you have just popped one in the microwave to defrost?

The problem there is suggesting that half-awake me should be using common-sense.

[The Year Of The Fox]

This was my living room in halls one day when I got back from uni, Mum was coming to pick me up to go home for xmas like an hour later.

Clothes in the kitchen cupboards, food in my wardrobe, toiletries in the sink, plates and cutlery in the shower. Arghhh.

Note how there's a box of tissues next to your bed!

[sphericalfox]

Couldn't you have just popped one in the microwave to defrost?

Taking a poop in a microwave could be deadly. Just one minute would ruin both it, and the flat he resides in!

EDIT: Should have read the rest of the thread.

I know of someone who did in fact put scrunched up tissues, gay porn mag on another friends bed, as he lay passed out on it. He also tucked a banana dildo out of the the back of his underpants, and took photos.

The retaliation was for his door to be removed by the hinges (with a screwdriver, and the hinge bolts hidden), and for when he fell asleep to have his eyesockets teabagged with photo evidence. I'm not sure whether that proved the first prank as true or not, but I'm just glad I didn't live with them.

Edited 23 March 2012 by sphericalfox

[Haydos]

Note how there's a box of tissues next to your bed!

They're called 'mansize' for a reason.

[Webbo]

People in their 20s complaining of feeling old.

[AoWW]

People in their 20s complaining of feeling old.

Sorry, I won't do it again, I promise.

[Corky]

Old people complaining about youngsters.

[Webbo]

Old people complaining about youngsters.

Middle aged