James. Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 Tell us a funny story. Recently remembered that one about the bird from Newcastle (?). Someone more resourceful than me might even be able to dig it out. Just to offset all the negative stuff in here about evil Somalians and baby killers. It's Christmas after all. EDIT: just remembered that other time when you had a few pints at lunch then went on here and wrote an amazing account of you growing up supporting Leicester.
Ric Flair Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 Hahahahahaaa, I promise to do one before Christmas. Struggling today though, busy. Nightmare.
General Smuts Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 Tell us about the time you shit yourself at Robbie Williams. Magical stuff.
Finnegan Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 I think I've got shitting himself at Robbie Williams, going on an awful holiday to Spain and the bird from Newcastle in my email inbox somewhere. Marsh dug 'em up a while ago. Ah, those Ric Flair classics.
General Smuts Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 I've just found her on facebook! 'orrible.
Guest BlueBrett Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 I saw a bird get her head stuck between the doors when she ran for the tube the other day. When she pulled herself free she had a fat black line down each side of her face! Not hilarious but definitely worth seeing. Oh and a few weeks ago saw this lager-lout-looking lad throw a slice of pizza a full 20 metres onto the head of this big shaven headed lesbian. Then he shouted "YES! DOUBLE SLICE!" (not sure what that bit was about) and ran off in the opposite direction.
I am Rod Hull Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 I saw a bird get her head stuck between the doors when she ran for the tube the other day. When she pulled herself free she had a fat black line down each side of her face! Not hilarious but definitely worth seeing. Oh and a few weeks ago saw this lager-lout-looking lad throw a slice of pizza a full 20 metres onto the head of this big shaven headed lesbian. Then he shouted "YES! DOUBLE SLICE!" (not sure what that it was about) and ran off in the opposite direction. Made me giggle...
Finnegan Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 I've just found her on facebook! 'orrible. lol Evidence must be supplied.
General Smuts Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 Sherlock it yourself. Took me 2 seconds. You have an usually spelt first name and a location.
kam6 Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 took me ages to read this at work, but F-CK me, great read. Dint think there was that many people more f""cked in the head than me! PS - share this profile linky....
Finnegan Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 Sherlock it yourself. Took me 2 seconds. You have an usually spelt first name and a location. It probably doesn't help I don't have Flair on FaceyB.
Saxondale Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 Oh and a few weeks ago saw this lager-lout-looking lad throw a slice of pizza a full 20 metres onto the head of this big shaven headed lesbian. Then he shouted "YES! DOUBLE SLICE!" (not sure what that bit was about) and ran off in the opposite direction.
General Smuts Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 It probably doesn't help I don't have Flair on FaceyB. I'd be suprised if they are Facebook friends.
Finnegan Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 I'd be suprised if they are Facebook friends. I got distracted.
Simmo86 Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 I'm sat here laughing like a girl at that story! Brilliant lol
StanSP Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 You could make a fucking quality film from Flair's experiences up in that part of the world! Bloody hell I'm in stitches!
Rincewind Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 D'ya wanna story? Made up or true? I could attempt something along the lines of the Xmas verse I did the other year. I will want a name an object and a problem from each participent.. Not sure how it will work out though.
I am Rod Hull Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 Around 20 years ago, me and my mate from work went to York races on pub trip and on getting back decided to pop into town for few, mate drove (he wasnt a big drinker). At the end of the night we bumped into a girl who also worked at our place and she asked for a lift home, mate said yes "no probs". Now this girl looked like a beach ball with limbs, small and round, and I tell my mate I want a kebab, gets kebab and off we go. Half way home I said to girl "hey Kristy (we used to call her Krusty behind her back) do you fancy 2`s up" ?, she says "you what", I say "you know, me and mickey, shaggy shaggy", my mates going "hey, you what, hey, what", then she says "ok then" at which point I feel a stirring down below. We arrive at my house which had a lane next to it and I tell my mate to go first because my kebabs going cold. So im chomping on my kebab listening to the sound of the springs on the back seat of his Nissan Sunny pissing myself laughing when he gets off her, and pulling his jeans up says "your turn", I looked him straight in the eyes and in a giggly kebab voice said "you must be fvcking joking" and I fell about laughing...... He replies "you bastard, I knew you wouldnt, you bastard, you fvcking vvanker" and off I stagger up my drive nearly falling over with laugher with him shouting "you fvckin wait, you bastard, dont tell no one you tvvat.... I fell asleep that night pissin myself laughing with look on his face in my head. I was on afternoons on the Monday and walked into work still laughing to myself when I see her, I point at her and go "AAAAAAAAGH" !, Beetroot face time for Krusty. Me 1-0 Mickey
Rincewind Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 Sorry. Never found that very funny and I bet the girl never did either.
Finnegan Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 Around 20 years ago, me and my mate from work went to York races on pub trip and on getting back decided to pop into town for few, mate drove (he wasnt a big drinker). At the end of the night we bumped into a girl who also worked at our place and she asked for a lift home, mate said yes "no probs". Now this girl looked like a beach ball with limbs, small and round, and I tell my mate I want a kebab, gets kebab and off we go. Half way home I said to girl "hey Kristy (we used to call her Krusty behind her back) do you fancy 2`s up" ?, she says "you what", I say "you know, me and mickey, shaggy shaggy", my mates going "hey, you what, hey, what", then she says "ok then" at which point I feel a stirring down below. We arrive at my house which had a lane next to it and I tell my mate to go first because my kebabs going cold. So im chomping on my kebab listening to the sound of the springs on the back seat of his Nissan Sunny pissing myself laughing when he gets off her, and pulling his jeans up says "your turn", I looked him straight in the eyes and in a giggly kebab voice said "you must be fvcking joking" and I fell about laughing...... He replies "you bastard, I knew you wouldnt, you bastard, you fvcking vvanker" and off I stagger up my drive nearly falling over with laugher with him shouting "you fvckin wait, you bastard, dont tell no one you tvvat.... I fell asleep that night pissin myself laughing with look on his face in my head. I was on afternoons on the Monday and walked into work still laughing to myself when I see her, I point at her and go "AAAAAAAAGH" !, Beetroot face time for Krusty. Me 1-0 Mickey YEAH MAN YOU'RE SO LAD! OMG!
Rincewind Posted 8 December 2011 Posted 8 December 2011 Preferred a kebab to a ------ Did you have mayonaise all over your kebab?
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