Leicester Rule! Posted 18 April 2010 Posted 18 April 2010 Now I’m as optimistic as anyone when it comes to this twát of a football club, but after this afternoon’s latest capitulation it’s time to wake up and smell the coffee – we’re fúcked. Down. Goners. Non-league. To be honest I didn’t know how it would affect me, it’s not like it hasn’t been coming, but tonight I just feel absolutely deflated. Absolutely fúcking devastated. I can’t get away from these emotions, I just want the whole world to just fúck off and leave me alone. To help me come to terms with this whole mess, I’ve decided to compile a list of everyone and everything I want to fúck off most of all. For starters, work can fúck off. If they think I’m going to be there on Monday morning they’ve got another thing coming. No way am I going in to spend time dealing with cúnts that I can barely stand being with when I’m in a good mood, let alone this crushing feeling of anger, frustration and outright metaphorical-kicked-in-the-bóllocks-ness. Plastic Premier League fans can fúck off. I just spoke to my Manchester United supporting neighbour (who incidentally, has been to Old Trafford before – twice) about Town’s predicament. You know what he said? “I know how you feel; it’s like when we failed to win a trophy in ‘95”. NO IT FÚCKING WELL IS NOT! He no longer has a face. The girlfriend can definitely fúck off. Her best attempt at consolation – “I don’t know why you’re bothered; you knew they were shít anyway”. Yes love, but they’re MY shít team. They’ve been MINE for pretty much as long as I’ve been able to wipe my own árse, and they’ll be MINE for as long as I’m alive (or at least, until I’m no longer able to wipe my own árse). Truth is, watching my team win does things for me that no woman can. If push comes to shove and I’m horny, I can always have a wánk. Barrow can fúck off. I’ve been all over the country and beyond to watch my team, but frankly I just don’t have the stomach to visit any town which makes S****horpe look like fúcking St. Tropez. Dad, you can fúck off. This is your fault. Your idea. You introduced me to this shower of shít. “Come with me to Blundell Park”, you said, “Come and support the boys”. What could I do? I was fúcking four, what choice did I have? Why not get me hooked on Heroin whilst you were at it? I could have gone with mum shopping for bras and knickers at British Home Stores, but no, you knew best. Granted, I’d have probably grown up a homosexual but surely even being simultaneously búggered two guys named Seth and Quentin couldn’t hurt like this. Seeing as we’re on the subject of homosexuality, Gok Wan can fúck off. No particular reason, I just plain don’t like the annoying, goggle-eyed cúnt. The F.A. can fúck off. Not for supplying us, week-in, week- out, with inept referee after inept referee, but for imposing sensible financial rules on all clubs in League Two. How many clubs in this division have been into administration this season? Not one. How many points deducted? Not one. How the fúck else are we supposed to avoid relegation – footballing merit? We didn’t have to last season, so why spoil the fun now? The World Cup can fúck off – I don’t care anymore. My local pizza shop can fúck off. I ordered a 12” Pepperoni over an hour ago, and where the fúck is it? Are they trying to fúcking fly it to me or something? Sky Sports can fúck off. Nothing personal, but there’ll be little need for me next season with no Town to be found anywhere. Ooh, Bolton versus Wolves, LIVE. I think I’ll pass... The radio can fúck off. On my way home from the match, whilst driving down the M180, I caught three completely separate stations playing ‘Down’ by Jay Sean at the exact same fúcking time. The song’s the best part of a year old, how the fúck does that happen by coincidence!? My nan’s old lucky Buddha that used to sit in her front room can fúck off. When I was a kid I held it in my hands and wished for Town to be in the Premier League. I meant the proper one you fat cúnt, not the one occupied by Histon, Eastbourne and for fúck’s sake, Ebbsfleet, wherever that is. Tonight can fúck off. I’ve had enough of trying to cope with my emotions; the time has come for oblivion. I haven’t kept any booze in the house since an occasion known only as ‘That Night’ by myself and the missus, but suffice to say that the toilet duck and luminous blue mouthwash are looking like stronger propositions by the minute. Most of all though, the last 10 years can fúck off. In that time I’ve watched my team fall from the top of the Championship into non-league nothingness. We’ve gone from one great big fúck up to the next without even coming up for air, and today is just the big, fúck off cherry on top. One thing I’m sure of though is that we WILL be back. When it comes down to it, a football club is basically just a set of supporters, and frankly what I’ve learned in the last few years is that this one has some of the best. We’ve had to put up with some shít, haven’t we boys, but in spite of all of that the future is still bright – it’s fúcking black and white. Grimsby ‘til I die... Grimsby Fan!
Mee Posted 18 April 2010 Posted 18 April 2010 Seeing as we’re on the subject of homosexuality, Gok Wan can fúck off. No particular reason, I just plain don’t like the annoying, goggle-eyed cúnt. This made me laugh, i do feel for him though, can't be nice seeing your team go into Non-League. Good read though
Tony Pine Posted 18 April 2010 Posted 18 April 2010 great stuff. he's obviously never gone on the channel tunnel, then he'd know where ebbsfleet was.
BoneDog Posted 19 April 2010 Posted 19 April 2010 When I was a kid I held it in my hands and wished for Town to be in the Premier League. I meant the proper one you fat cúnt, not the one occupied by Histon, Who is he calling a fat C? And Gok Wan goggle eyed C !!
The Doctor Posted 19 April 2010 Posted 19 April 2010 Who is he calling a fat C? And Gok Wan goggle eyed C !! buddha. quality read.
AyewJoking Posted 19 April 2010 Posted 19 April 2010 When I think of Grimsby the first thing that comes to mind is Muzzy's bicycle.
Guest Bilo Posted 19 April 2010 Posted 19 April 2010 That is bloody brilliant. How the hell anyone can still be that funny when they've just watched their team go into non-league is beyond me. Favourite comment was about Barrow making Scunny look like St. Tropez. Oh and this one. Plastic Premier League fans can fúck off. I just spoke to my Manchester United supporting neighbour (who incidentally, has been to Old Trafford before – twice) about Town’s predicament. You know what he said? “I know how you feel; it’s like when we failed to win a trophy in ‘95”. NO IT FÚCKING WELL IS NOT!He no longer has a face. Pretty much sums up how I felt when we down to League One does that.
Guest Bilo Posted 8 May 2010 Posted 8 May 2010 Well, they've gone now. Will they come straight back up? Depends on how they view it really. They probably are too big for the BSP, but then so were Oxford, York, Luton and Halifax. None came straight back. That said, no big club had come straight back up from League One for years before we did either. If they take it as an opportunity to rebuild the squad and clear out the dead wood, they can do what we did hopefully. Bit sad really, I like Grimsby and they're my local-ish team when I'm back home.
dandannieldanok Posted 8 May 2010 Posted 8 May 2010 Must be absolutely gutting for them, and any other club that has suffered relegation from League 2 in the past and those that will in the future. Far worse than any other relegation from other leagues.
Corky Posted 16 August 2011 Posted 16 August 2011 Eight years ago Grimsby were in the First Division. Tonight, in the Conference, they lost 5-0 at Braintree Town. Will the fan be back again with another rant?
Guest Bilo Posted 16 August 2011 Posted 16 August 2011 Horrible result for them considering Braintree are part-time. They've an unusual managerial set-up as well there with two joint managers, albeit with a reasonably good record in non-league football. Grimsby is the highest level they've managed at though, they came from Boston in the BSN, and it sounds as though they're a bit out of their depth.
Fox92 Posted 17 August 2011 Posted 17 August 2011 I have a soft spot for Grimsby. Ever since I went to the away game at Blundell Park when Muzzy scored the over head kick. I wish they were in the our division again.
Guest Bilo Posted 17 August 2011 Posted 17 August 2011 I have a soft spot for Grimsby. Ever since I went to the away game at Blundell Park when Muzzy scored the over head kick. I wish they were in the our division again. And me, good club with decent support who've been through the wringer with years and years of absolute dross. I was there that night, freezing my balls off but still jumping around like a loon when Muzzy scored that goal. Very much my local club nowadays being less than an hour's drive away.
Houdini Logic Posted 17 August 2011 Posted 17 August 2011 It's easy to be sentimental about them because they're shit. If they were in our league and buying up all the players I'm sure I'd hate them as much as anyone else
SystonFox Posted 19 August 2011 Posted 19 August 2011 It's easy to be sentimental about them because they're shit. If they were in our league and buying up all the players I'm sure I'd hate them as much as anyone else This. No doubt I don't dislike Grimsby town fc but if they'd just beat us 0-2 on our first home game I'd fc king despise them! Or if they won't sell us their star striker for an obscene amount and then he goes and blasts two goals past us to condemn us to the doom and gloom of 17th in the table and ONLY 3 pts from 9 and being a whole 6 pts behind the mighty Southampton fc then I would hate their shitty club. Rant over. We need more loan poster sifnings
Foxinspain Posted 20 August 2011 Posted 20 August 2011 sorry - but when he told his fellow grimsby fan Chin up big fella. I came close to actually turning into
Guest Bilo Posted 29 August 2011 Posted 29 August 2011 Don't ever mess with one of their joint managers after a home defeat. I can't imagine Sven telling one of our fans to fvck off somehow.
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.