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Stay Positive

Things people say that they think are funny...but aren't?

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Posted

People who still do the 'garlic....bread" routine more than 10 years after Peter Kay first did it. It was funny when he said it. Not now.

This is my mums partners message tone - its also on an old Nokia it's about as loud as it gets

Posted

The shit that those weird toilet aftershave salesmen come out with to try and extort money out of pissed yooves.

"No Calvin Klein, no 69"

"No cologne, no bone"

Etc, etc.

Fvck the fvck off!

Posted

The shit that those weird toilet aftershave salesmen come out with to try and extort money out of pissed yooves.

"No Calvin Klein, no 69"

"No cologne, no bone"

Etc, etc.

Fvck the fvck off!

Splash for gash

Posted

You're out the front washing your car and the 10th person in 5 minutes walks past and says "You can do mine, I'll bring it over."

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

That's me laughing at him rolling around in the gutter with a split nose.

Posted

"Put it behind my ear and I'll smoke it later" :angry:

It's just not funny and does nothing for a chap's confidence , ladies !!

Posted

People that call the internet t'internet is still an issue for me. Older folk at work are usually responsible

Also similar aged people that have things like "don't be nasty, show us your pasty" as their favourite quotes. Truly embarrassing

Posted

"Put it behind my ear and I'll smoke it later" :angry:

It's just not funny and does nothing for a chap's confidence , ladies !!

lol You can always tell yourself it's a big cigar.

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