Daggers

Job done

When someone tells me wtf GrubHub+ is that can be the thing I've just found out about.

Yep. There's nothing wrong with choosing to feature a pig in the advertising. No siree, none at all.

Man City and Chelsea be like...

DM me your email and I'll forward you some of the pictures @Raj constantly sends me.

4/10 Poor bollock definition, hairless, and a complete lack of emission.

Dear Blur, Thank you, but I have the unpleasant task of informing you that your application to join the secret inner circle has been formerly rejected on the basis that you sound like you are my daughter and that would make things weird. All the best of luck with your future attempts to join other, inferior clandestine gangs. Regards, etc.

Because without it you'd not have known that Big Sam was in Food Plus grocery store. OR he's become a manager for Food Plus grocery store.

We’re a couple of seasons away from “You get preferential rates on a season ticket to attend all matches, if you can’t go that’s your look out. Tell us we’ll give you a £5 credit. You can’t pass your ticket on. Not informing us will result in the termination of your season ticket.” Ten years, there’ll be no season tickets.

I think we ought to acknowledge the unspoken role being played by the deep state here.

And yet no matter how much love Mummy and Daddy have, twelve years later, her continued sange froid will drive him into the arms of barmaid to seek solace in her warm bosom. Meanwhile, she is getting more instruction than the average Pilates student receives for the money. And so the sham of a marriage continues for decades as lies build on lies and the tower of cards scales unsustainable heights. Err, so I’m told.

Ima bumping this

Used to play Rockstar for my Year 5 class every Friday afternoon full volume for going home time - their choice. I was loathed by the entire staff. Actually, I probably could’ve managed that without Nickleback’s help.

What a Tory.

Exclusive: A major newspaper investigations team has discovered that a member of a popular Leicester City podcast has been receiving additional napkins from a McDonalds drive thru and has been failing to declare the complimentary Anusol cream he receives from an online pharmacy. Yet again, our summer is about to be rocked by shocking revelations. I think Flair has let us all down.

That, and for as many decent people as possible to join the Tories and vote Truss in as leader again.

So, Labour are now doing the LibDem’s account