Vacamion

Well done Leeds and Burnley. Enjoy languishing forlornly next season, as is now traditional.

Beating Spurs. We were AWFUL this season and still they didn't beat us.

It was obviously Steven Jefferson's missus calling the club repeatedly and telling them it was urgent, because he'd told her he was at the game, but actually, he was in a Travelodge near Runcorn burying part of himself in Naomi, his much younger PA, but Mrs Jefferson's suspicions had been aroused because he left the house in his best going out clothes, smelling of Hugo Boss. It's a tale as old as time...

Not a chance. I think he clings on til he's shoved.

The least surprising relegation ever. Not with a bang, with a whimper.

Are we playing for a point?

Steven Jefferson is deffo away somewhere else having it away.

Luke putting a shift in. Just there he was trying to take a throw in and no one showing for him. You could see him mouth the word "move".

The telly repeatedly showing the Vardy screamer against Liverpool in 2016 is rubbing it in, a bit.

Leicester City 8/1 against, in a two horse race, at home. Bookies know what's about to happen.

It was a filthy tackle, nowhere near the ball, and put his opponent in danger of a bad injury. I'm ok with that as a red.

After struggling a little with training over recent weeks, l did the Monklands Half Marathon this morning. There weren't really many fun runners. Instead, there were plenty of club runners who hared off at the start. I finished 3rd last, (someone has to ) in 2hr 39m, some 17 minutes behind my last finish there in 2019.

He looked bright but he was bossed about a bit by Hamza. He'll be a good player for us if he stays injury free.

Hamza on top, so far.

That concession was Leicester-esque.

I miss the times when we had a sprinkling of local lads in the side.

Could have won that

The best thing about a borefest Manchester Derby is that it means that Drury has only screamed a name two or three times all match, and even then only in half-stangulated near chance mode, and also that Gary Neville hasn't had the chance to do that Jimmy Savile gargle noise he makes. It's almost been like snooker commentary at times.

This is fairly boring.

The Best Scouse Cheerleader Award. The Spurs Medal of Distinction for Actually Losing To [Waves Vaguely] This. Best Managerial Rollneck Sweater. The Bouba Soumaré Jogging Whilst Shrugging Prize. Ex-Spurs Midfielder of The Season.

Three left backs in the starting XI, an early concession due to a brain fart, "brave" containment for 20 minutes, Zero XG, Ayew and Bobby DCR as subs second half, 0.01 XG, empty stands, heavy defeat, booing. We've seen this movie.

Alright, James Maddison, keep yer hair on.

My favourite bit was when we were losing 2-0, parked the bus, swapped attackers for midfielders and defenders and had no attacking threat second half. That was a hoot.

I don't want to be a Percy Pessimist, but I think we might be in a little bit of relegation trouble.

Almost got a frisson out of that botched attack.