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bollocks

smelly fingers

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Posted

But what the hell are 'breather rings' and 'rusty sheriff badges'?!

Sometimes known as a brown starfish.

Posted

:wave:

How? Have you got a Catheter fitted or something?

Posted

One of the few things i did learn at school... is that it isn't possible to have have a piss and a crap at the same time.

Oh it is, if you're desperate enough for both. :D

Posted

Delightful thread.

Do people stand up or sit down to wipe? One of my mates and I seem to be in the minority of our group by standing up.

Also do people really use babywipes as opposed to toilet roll?! Surely they don't have the grip on them to clean properly. Must take about 20 sheets!

Posted

Delightful thread.

Do people stand up or sit down to wipe? One of my mates and I seem to be in the minority of our group by standing up.

Also do people really use babywipes as opposed to toilet roll?! Surely they don't have the grip on them to clean properly. Must take about 20 sheets!

I never stand up until I've made sure the area's clean because if there is a clinker that you didn't know about then your cheeks would squeeze it together and create a right mess. I suppose clinkers are very rare though.

On a side note, when I was at school I always used to pick the chair up and sniff it when I went in a class just in case a smelly ass poo person had been sitting there in the lesson before. Then if it does stink you can change it with another chair before all chairs are taken. The downside is that if the chair does kick off a whiff then you are stuck with the smell at the back of your throat for 10 minutes.

Posted

I've always called clinkers bum crumbs.

Juvenile fact for the day.

Posted

One of the few things i did learn at school... is that it isn't possible to have have a piss and a crap at the same time.

:D

I told all of my mates this fact once when I was about 17 but it turns out that I had mis-remembered and didn't quite recall what the teacher had said. I don't want to lower the tone of the thread but the real scientific fact that the teacher told us was actually that a man can't piss and bost a nut at the same time (and not that we can't p*ss and sh*t at the same time).

I still find it a bit weird that our school gave us a lesson on a list of fears that women had about giving blowjobs! But I did like the lesson - it was definitely one of the funniest things that happened that week at school.

Posted

:D

3. Peanut Revels

4. Dangleberries.

Posted

Double wiper me - got to have that insurance wipe to catch anything that is trying to hid on me.

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