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Koke

Burglars

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Posted

What's the score with these ****ing bastards in your house? Is it if they come up the stairs, then you'll pretty much get away with whatever (providing it can be classed as self-defence)?

I understand that if I kick seven colours of shite out of them, which would be my preferred option, then I can face criminal charges. But how much can I realistically get away with?

Posted
What's the score with these ****ing bastards in your house? Is it if they come up the stairs, then you'll pretty much get away with whatever (providing it can be classed as self-defence)?

I understand that if I kick seven colours of shite out of them, which would be my preferred option, then I can face criminal charges. But how much can I realistically get away with?

Didn't a burglar fall through the roof onto a farmers kitchen knife once and ended up getting hundreds of thousands in compensation?

They've got more rights than non-burglars :P

Posted

Reasonable force is the legal terminology. Obviously when faced with a burglar, the first thing you'll be thinking about what is reasonable and proportionate under the circumstances......

Posted

This thread will go one of two ways:

1. Tony Martin and gypos.

2. Immigration and the inevitable demise of the English language.

---

In answer to your question I think you'd be perfectly within your rights to knock them around a bit. Just make sure you don't shoot one in the back... :whistle:

Posted

We have lots of sites at work that are closed to the public basically because they are dangerous, we got told on a training course the other day that some yoof got injured after breaking into our site and the company had to pay him compensation!!

Posted
This thread will go one of two ways:

1. Tony Martin and gypos.

2. Immigration and the inevitable demise of the English language.

---

In answer to your question I think you'd be perfectly within your rights to knock them around a bit. Just make sure you don't shoot one in the back... :whistle:

That would just be cowardly, at least tell him to turn around first....

And in response to your question (of sort) i think it'll start off with gypos and progress into immigration with a touch of abuse about leeds thrown into the middle

Posted

My sister just got back from holiday to find some burglars had paid her a visit. They took quite a lot, jewellery worth thousands, laptops, DVD players, the kids PS3 and her telly. The bastards probably knew what they were doing cos one of the windows at the back of her house was removed and lying on the floor in the garden. No idea how they managed to get the window out of the frame but there was no scratches on it.

The sequence of all this is quite disturbing. My mum got robbed in 2005, my brother suffered the same thing in 2008 and now my sister is the victim. Sods law says I'm next. Do we, as a family, have have some kind of special magnet where we attract those c*nts or something? It baffles me.

If it happens to me I may use excessive force (to put it politely) and land myself in trouble with the law.

Posted
My sister just got back from holiday to find some burglars had paid her a visit. They took quite a lot, jewellery worth thousands, laptops, DVD players, the kids PS3 and her telly. The bastards probably knew what they were doing cos one of the windows at the back of her house was removed and lying on the floor in the garden. No idea how they managed to get the window out of the frame but there was no scratches on it.

The sequence of all this is quite disturbing. My mum got robbed in 2005, my brother suffered the same thing in 2008 and now my sister is the victim. Sods law says I'm next. Do we, as a family, have have some kind of special magnet where we attract those c*nts or something? It baffles me.

If it happens to me I may use excessive force (to put it politely) and land myself in trouble with the law.

You robbed your own sister, how dare you!!! :giggle:

PS - Only kiddin, I nearly got robbed on saturday, our house over the years has been burgled 3 times, with alot of priceless family items taken.......one of the most horrible things to happen to you!!

Posted
This is why I have 2 pen kinves and a pick axe in my room lol

That's the sort of thing that gets you in bother with the plod.

Get yourself a nice big Maglite torch instead. They're ace for whacking people with, and you won't get any funny questions about why you had one in your room

Posted
That's the sort of thing that gets you in bother with the plod.

Get yourself a nice big Maglite torch instead. They're ace for whacking people with, and you won't get any funny questions about why you had one in your room

Having knives and an axe in his room could easily be brushed off when the fuzz start asking questions. It's a simple, one word answer.

Emo.

Posted
That's the sort of thing that gets you in bother with the plod.

Get yourself a nice big Maglite torch instead. They're ace for whacking people with, and you won't get any funny questions about why you had one in your room

What if it was for anal insertion?

Oh right, I see, there wouldn't even be an awkward question to answer so no need to mention it?

Ooops.

Posted
What if it was for anal insertion?

Well that would be a perfectly valid reason. If you claimed you were sticking a penknife up your arse, they'd think you were a right pervert, but a torch, hey, it's 2009

Posted
Well that would be a perfectly valid reason. If you claimed you were sticking a penknife up your arse, they'd think you were a right pervert, but a torch, hey, it's 2009

All sounds like Torchure to me!

Wahey! TPH is back, everybody!

Posted
We have lots of sites at work that are closed to the public basically because they are dangerous, we got told on a training course the other day that some yoof got injured after breaking into our site and the company had to pay him compensation!!

One day at work, I've to check a lot of dangerous sites to ensure they are safe enough to avoid someone injuring themselves if they broken in and that it's safe from fire hazard etc.

Posted
One day at work, I've to check a lot of dangerous sites to ensure they are safe enough to avoid someone injuring themselves if they broken in and that it's safe from fire hazard etc.

Do you check by sending a kid up onto the roof of the building to retrieve a lost football?

Posted
My sister just got back from holiday to find some burglars had paid her a visit. They took quite a lot, jewellery worth thousands, laptops, DVD players, the kids PS3 and her telly. The bastards probably knew what they were doing cos one of the windows at the back of her house was removed and lying on the floor in the garden. No idea how they managed to get the window out of the frame but there was no scratches on it.

The sequence of all this is quite disturbing. My mum got robbed in 2005, my brother suffered the same thing in 2008 and now my sister is the victim. Sods law says I'm next. Do we, as a family, have have some kind of special magnet where we attract those c*nts or something? It baffles me.

If it happens to me I may use excessive force (to put it politely) and land myself in trouble with the law.

That's harsh to hear man. I hope she had insurance.

It's a tough one because these days you don't know if the burglar is armed with a knife especially as they could easily grab one from the kitchen. I have a hockey stick above my cupboard just in case but I would only use it if im directly under threat i.e knife being waved at me etc.

When my old man got burgled in the seventies he chased the burglar but got smacked round the head with a chair. He woke up to find the guy going through my mums jewelry!

These days the trend is to rob people with sports cars and will break in just for the keys!

Posted
Do you check by sending a kid up onto the roof of the building to retrieve a lost football?

I could 'lend' him some if that is the case. :devil:

Posted
That's the sort of thing that gets you in bother with the plod.

Get yourself a nice big Maglite torch instead. They're ace for whacking people with, and you won't get any funny questions about why you had one in your room

Got one aswell :)

Having knives and an axe in his room could easily be brushed off when the fuzz start asking questions. It's a simple, one word answer.

Emo.

that is correct, I am :P

You have those things because you live in South East London :P

Thats true aswell, although it aint as bad as people make out

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