Things you've learned today.

[Izzy]

I'm shit at golf and will never get any better as I get older. Time to stop my membership and take up a new hobby 

[Buce]

6 minutes ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

I'm shit at golf and will never get any better as I get older. Time to stop my membership and take up a new hobby 

 

Maybe you need a Sports Nutritional supplement, Izzy:

 

[Izzy]

3 minutes ago, Buce said:

 

Maybe you need a Sports Nutritional supplement, Izzy:

 

Oh look, it's another ginger joke 

'Par for the course' from you mate I guess 

[ozleicester]

well you putt him in his place

[tom27111]

8 hours ago, ozleicester said:

If you ask a masseuse to do it harder... you are opening the gates of hell

 

On a related note, the hole in the massage table is for your head.

 

When they say "Get undressed and make yourself comfortable" they need to be clearer.

 

My back still hurts. Basically because I had to run away from a group of massage therapists.

[Guest the fox]

I found out that your fingers shrivel up like this because your body is adapting to have a grip underwater (got it from twitter)

[ramboacdc]

well im afraid to tell you sir thats bullshit. its osmosis of water leaving your skin and into the water as the pressure is lower. if your fact was true it would happen inatantly.

Sent from my SM-G930F using Tapatalk

[Jattdogg]

1 hour ago, ramboacdc said:

well im afraid to tell you sir thats bullshit. its osmosis of water leaving your skin and into the water as the pressure is lower. if your fact was true it would happen inatantly.

Sent from my SM-G930F using Tapatalk
 

FAKE NEWS 

[Izzy]

Cooking bacon in the microwave is a lot quicker and less messy than doing it under the grill or in a frying pan

[StanSP]

8 minutes ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

Cooking bacon in the microwave is a lot quicker and less messy than doing it under the grill or in a frying pan

does it taste as good after that method though?

 

must admit frying pan is annoying to clean but it's so worth it for good bacon!

[Webbo]

12 minutes ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

Cooking bacon in the microwave is a lot quicker and less messy than doing it under the grill or in a frying pan

Tastes crap though.

[Buce]

12 minutes ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

Cooking bacon in the microwave is a lot quicker and less messy than doing it under the grill or in a frying pan

 

But your kids will hate you:

 

[Izzy]

5 minutes ago, StanSP said:

does it taste as good after that method though?

 

must admit frying pan is annoying to clean but it's so worth it for good bacon!

 

3 minutes ago, Webbo said:

Tastes crap though.

Depends on how long you cook it for and at what power level I've discovered.

 

Three rashers with a sheet of kitchen roll to cover cooked on High for 4.5 minutes and it crisps up lovely in my experience.

 

Need another sheet of kitchen roll to absorb the fat after but so much quicker and easier than a grill or pan for me 

 

 

[Crinklyfox]

20 hours ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

I'm shit at golf and will never get any better as I get older. Time to stop my membership and take up a new hobby 

Remind me of your handicap again........

 

If you seriously want a new sport try bowls.  You don't need to walk for hours to play it, the equipment's a lot cheaper and the company's usually good.  You also don't need to be in peak physical condition to play it.  I only took it up when I retired and wish I started a decade earlier when I finished with cricket.  You will find, however, that frustratingly many of the best players are younger than you....

[Buce]

40 minutes ago, Crinklyfox said:

Remind me of your handicap again........

 

If you seriously want a new sport try bowls.  You don't need to walk for hours to play it, the equipment's a lot cheaper and the company's usually good.  You also don't need to be in peak physical condition to play it.  I only took it up when I retired and wish I started a decade earlier when I finished with cricket.  You will find, however, that frustratingly many of the best players are younger than you....

 

21 hours ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

I'm shit at golf and will never get any better as I get older. Time to stop my membership and take up a new hobby 

 

That seems like quite a handicap, tbf.

[Jattdogg]

My 4 and 2 year old kids really dont give a flying fook about sleeping in on weekends (even if they go to bed later then normal or on time). Heck they get up even earlier just to piss you off. 

[Izzy]

1 hour ago, Crinklyfox said:

Remind me of your handicap again........

 

If you seriously want a new sport try bowls.  You don't need to walk for hours to play it, the equipment's a lot cheaper and the company's usually good.  You also don't need to be in peak physical condition to play it.  I only took it up when I retired and wish I started a decade earlier when I finished with cricket.  You will find, however, that frustratingly many of the best players are younger than you....

I play golf off 7 now Oz but slowly creeping up. Just finding it more and more difficult to compete and win comps. I don't hit is as far as before and can't keep up with the young kids playing the game. I know that if I want to improve I need lessons, coaching and practice but I really cba to.

 

Bowls could be the future - nice idea. I might look into it actually.

 

But what I really need to do is quit golf and spend Saturdays with my 8 year old lad instead. He's ready to play for a decent local youth team and he's also desperate to go and watch City play now.

 

Time to stop being so selfish I suppose...

[ScouseFox]

On 29/07/2017 at 12:11, ozleicester said:

If you ask a masseuse to do it harder... you are opening the gates of hell

sounds certainly sexy 

[Buce]

 

I learned a new word today - exhaustipated.

 

It means too tired to give a shit.

[Crinklyfox]

17 hours ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

I play golf off 7 now Oz but slowly creeping up. Just finding it more and more difficult to compete and win comps. I don't hit is as far as before and can't keep up with the young kids playing the game. I know that if I want to improve I need lessons, coaching and practice but I really cba to.

 

Bowls could be the future - nice idea. I might look into it actually.

 

But what I really need to do is quit golf and spend Saturdays with my 8 year old lad instead. He's ready to play for a decent local youth team and he's also desperate to go and watch City play now.

 

Time to stop being so selfish I suppose...

You can usually try bowls for free.  Your local club probably has an open day or two a year when you can turn up and try bowling using their equipment.  Mine also has a system where new bowlers can have six two hour sessions of tuition free before they decide if bowls is for them or not and I know a number of other clubs have similar schemes.

 

Bowls clubs usually have a number of friendly matches against other clubs per season, many of them during the week, but otherwise you can just turn up and bowl when it suits you.  I regularly pitch up at my club and play whoever else is there.

 

Time with the family can't be replaced, I used to play cricket on Saturday or Sunday but always felt a bit guilty about it, especially if I'd been working away from home during the week.  I used to go see my youngest play cricket when he started for the colts though.  I treasure any time I get with my children, strangely enough the only time I now spend with my eldest is when we hack around our local golf course together, he does love to slaughter his old dad.

[StanSP]

14 hours ago, Buce said:

 

I learned a new word today - exhaustipated.

 

It means too tired to give a shit.

saw this from Susie Dent on Twitter...

 

lots of people on FT can relate  

[Buce]

10 minutes ago, StanSP said:

saw this from Susie Dent on Twitter...

 

lots of people on FT can relate  

 

What, old but useful?

[Guest]

Google can't find me anyone named Glen Parva.

[Jattdogg]

51 minutes ago, FIF said:

Google can't find me anyone named Glen Parva.

#FreeGlenParva

[Rocket-Ron]

That Ramones was a pseudonym and not their surnames.