Geo V Posted 11 September 2007 Share Posted 11 September 2007 I was on the toilet for half an hour earlier reading the Godfather.I think I was shiting for about 2 minutes of that. I love toilet time. A sign that I should ease off a tad with internet poker was quite apparent a few months back when I was playing a poker comp, neednt the bog and decided to plug in the laptop and take that with me into the toilet. It didnt feel right. It was as awkward as pi$$ing in the sea, eating in the bath and saying yes to a threes-up with the girlfriend and her best mate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James. Posted 11 September 2007 Author Share Posted 11 September 2007 What the hell happened to my Joy of Life threads anyway. I did this one, then one about beds and then I think I just became content with that. Toilets and beds. So much pleasure, right there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeyB Posted 11 September 2007 Share Posted 11 September 2007 Reading on the toilet is one of they joys of life! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigGibbo Posted 11 September 2007 Share Posted 11 September 2007 A sign that I should ease off a tad with internet poker was quite apparent a few months back when I was playing a poker comp, neednt the bog and decided to plug in the laptop and take that with me into the toilet. It didnt feel right. It was as awkward as pi$$ing in the sea, eating in the bath and saying yes to a threes-up with the girlfriend and her best mate. is it still possible to win with all those poker bots about? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SOCCERROO FOX Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 My house has 3 toilets inside 1 outside and there is 5 people so some times the toilets the best place for thinking time and reading time. Currently there is 2 sports magazines in my main dunny and a july dated newspaper (too lazy to chuck it out) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DanTheFoxBhoy Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 How can anyone sit on the toilet for 10 minutes without restricting blood flow to the legs and feet? I killed some nerves in my right butt cheek once after I fell asleep on the shitter after a night of heavy drinking. Take note kids, alcohol can affect you in more ways than one. Most of those ways extremely enjoyable! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The People's Hero Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 mine is like a libraryBest reads in there are:- Timewaster letters QI Pedants Revolt Pedants return Darwin Awards (my personal fave) Grumpy Old men Fossils and Foxes The Seven secrets of Highly succesful people Paul Mckenna's I can make you thin Paul Mackennas Change your life Next Directory Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The People's Hero Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 I want the life's simple pleasures threads back. How about one on waking up and not realising it's a bank holiday/day off work/weekend immediately... then the relief 2 minutes later and getting back in bed.... ahhhhh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hairy Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 Scratching your ar5ehole is very satisfying. But not whilst on the toilet, that can lead to problems. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Durnerz Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 I save all mine for work and get paid for it. I worked out that I earn about £50 on the dumper each year! That makes a good poop all the more satisfying. As for reading materials theres always a copy of FHM, Nuts or the Sun in there when I go to drop friends off at the pool. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unit Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 How can you take 10 minutes on a toilet? By the time I found the page I'd be on I'd be done 10 minutes isn't a proper shit, at least 25 minutes is required to properly empty ones bowels. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trumpet Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 Im going for one now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trumpet Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 Done. Thats the "Steve Beaver Hole's 4 Minute challenge". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Master Fox Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 Im going for one now. Oh Jesus. I've got severe bum sick. I had few bottles of beer last night, but man it was like an atomic explosion. I feel ill. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wycombe Fox Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 You could set your clock by my ablutions - if I'm on the loo, it's 10.00am! Read? No! I'm like Vidal Sassoon in the bathroom - Sh*t and Go! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zingari Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 You could set your clock by my ablutions - if I'm on the loo, it's 10.00am!Read? No! I'm like Vidal Sassoon in the bathroom - Sh*t and Go! i'm the same , regular as clockwork i do a dump at 6:30 i'll have to start setting the alarm clock so i'm up by then Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bojimha Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 Surely you must know of better places to relax?! ! A small room (well in my bathroom) filled with a poo'ey smell doesn't sound relaxing! I prefer to leave it until on the brink, dive in drop it out. wipe. wash hands and run out and pretend it wasnt me! You should try one of them thai massages, much more relaxing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alexikokopops Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 You could set your clock by my ablutions - if I'm on the loo, it's 10.00am!Read? No! I'm like Vidal Sassoon in the bathroom - Sh*t and Go! Wasn't it Wash and Go shampoo that had the tagline "Wash and go"? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Master Fox Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 Surely you must know of better places to relax?! !A small room (well in my bathroom) filled with a poo'ey smell doesn't sound relaxing! I prefer to leave it until on the brink, dive in drop it out. wipe. wash hands and run out and pretend it wasnt me! You should try one of them thai massages, much more relaxing! *Holds nose to resemble a pigs snout* 'We do not pass solids in the down stairs lavatory' says Panz I find the whole task of passing bodily waste rather repulsive, and for the record my faeces does not smell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wycombe Fox Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 Wasn't it Wash and Go shampoo that had the tagline "Wash and go"? Yep! Vidal Sassoon 'Wash and Go' - that's the play on words - geddit? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geo V Posted 12 September 2007 Share Posted 12 September 2007 is it still possible to win with all those poker bots about? I think all the rumours that websites have there own "bots" playing for the house is rubbish mate. Most big gaming companies are monitored by some important accountants mate. It only gets dodgy when you log into these horrible private sites that can be bought with software for about £1000 like Geoworld Back to taking a dump, is everyone like clockwork on here? My body is just like clockwork. About 7am I`ll have one and wont need one until around 7am the next day. Some of my mates have told me (we discuss matters like this all the time ) 2 or 3 times a day. I simply tell them they do that because they are full of shite. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SOCCERROO FOX Posted 13 September 2007 Share Posted 13 September 2007 Done.Thats the "Steve Beaver Hole's 4 Minute challenge". My brother loves his "2 minute bozzers" personally i like my 10-15 minutes Larry Birds Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bert Posted 13 September 2007 Share Posted 13 September 2007 If you sit on the toilet for about an hour, your shit turns into a one wipe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MPH Posted 13 September 2007 Share Posted 13 September 2007 I think all the rumours that websites have there own "bots" playing for the house is rubbish mate. Most big gaming companies are monitored by some important accountants mate. It only gets dodgy when you log into these horrible private sites that can be bought with software for about £1000 like Geoworld Back to taking a dump, is everyone like clockwork on here? My body is just like clockwork. About 7am I`ll have one and wont need one until around 7am the next day. Some of my mates have told me (we discuss matters like this all the time ) 2 or 3 times a day. I simply tell them they do that because they are full of shite. im a bit weird.... i cant go for a dump straight after waking up. i usually go for a number 1 first, then i need to walk around for a bit then i can go for a dump... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr The Singh Posted 13 September 2007 Share Posted 13 September 2007 im a bit weird....i cant go for a dump straight after waking up. i usually go for a number 1 first, then i need to walk around for a bit then i can go for a dump... Jus think of Megson nude and it will make you will vommit and poo, maybe at the same time!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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