The joke thread

[Bilo]

A farmer is on his driving test when the examiner asks 'Can you make a U turn?'

He replies, 'No, but I can make its fucking eyes water.'

[MarkDeVries]

*RACIST JOKE BEWARE*

Why do black people only have nightmares?

Because the last black person to have a dream got shot

Edited 24 June 2009 by MarkDeVries

[hairy]

[Bert]

I'm really gutted Jacko has died, he taught me how to put on my first condom!

[Jimmy]

*BAD TASTE ALERT*

1)

Michael Jackson did manage to whisper a brief message to paramedics on his way to hospital... put me in the childrens ward

2)

apparently he cant be cremated because the plastic fumes would damage the envrionment..

Edited 25 June 2009 by Jimmy

[General Smuts]

It has been confirmed that the Violin section of Americas children's orchestra will play at Michael Jackson's funeral!

Irony kiddie fiddlers playing for a kiddie fiddler

Jockeys around the world will be wearing black armbands today to honour Michael Jackson, as apparently he rode more 3 year olds than any of them

Jackos ghost has been sighted in a childrens hospital, looks like he will continue to try and put the willies up small children!

[Mr Happy]

Michael Jackson is not going to be buried or creamated, instead he will be recycled into shopping bags so he can remain white, plastic ad dangerous for children to play with.

[Messi]

Due to the fact that Michael Jackson is already 99% plastic, instead of cremating him they are gonna melt him down into lego bricks and let the kids play with him for a change!!

[Tevez]

Micheal Jacksons last words...

"Put me in the Childrens Ward"

[shen]

What would this thread be without celebrity deaths?

[Fox You Forest]

Twenty pages shorter.

[davieG]

What would this thread be without celebrity deaths?

Dead and Buried

[Father Ted]

Victoria Beckham has announced she had an affair with Michael Jackson.

Jacko has denied the allegations as he claims he was in Brooklyn at the time.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a PS3?

Nothing; they're both plastic, they both come in black and white, and they both get turned on by kids.

[LoughboroughFox]

I hear michael jackson aint been this stiff since McCauley culkin stopped the night

[lavrentis]

In 1996 Why did Michael Jackson get the sack as the England football manager?

Cos he wanted to put Seaman in the U16's

[Big Ol' Bob]

[Joe.]

[Fox You Forest]

Serves him right.

[Granno]

Animated thing...

Owned

Edited 29 June 2009 by Granno

[DANGEROUS TIGER]

The latest news report states that M.J.s family want him cremated, and recycled into rubbish bags, so that he can be what he was in life... black, plastic. and still a danger to children. One U.S. Senator was quoted as saying that his remains could resolve the unemployment problem in the the American plastics industry.

[whitlock]

The latest news report states that M.J.s family want him cremated, and recycled into rubbish bags, so that he can be what he was in life... black, plastic. and still a danger to children. One U.S. Senator was quoted as saying that his remains could resolve the unemployment problem in the the American plastics industry.

Brilliant.

[NewquayFox]

What will all the little Dyslexic kids do at Christmas now that Setanta is dead ? ;0)

[StanSP]

Kassim Bakari, the father of a 14 year old girl who was the sole survivor of the Yemenia Airways Crash, told reporters "I never thought she would get out like that - it's the Good Lord who wanted it".

Yes, the very same Good Lord who sent 152 other people to a watery grave

Women's football would be a lot more popular if they renamed it "22 girls 1 cup"

[NewquayFox]

Two Paramedics arrived at Michael Jacksons place answering the 911 call. The first Paramedic said "what should we try first? The other Paramedic said "I dont know about you but i am going on the feckin roller coaster!!! ;0)

[AjcW]

Extemely Bad Taste Alert....

They say you will remember your position the night Michael Jackson died....... Maddy certainly will.....

On the swings in the theme park obviously, what the hell were you dirty minded feckers thinking.... gosh.... tut tut....