Vardinhio Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Right, well down here in Bristol I've been living in this new house a month. The housemate is also the landlady but she's rude, condescending and quite frankly I feel like anything I do different to her gets criticised. We are both in our mid 20s and both work at the same place but in different teams. I am not her friend but we do have many friends in the same group. Just really not sure whether or not to cut and run and find somewhere else or to stick it out. On the plus side the house here is lovely, I get my own bathroom etc but on downside she is a complete tool and I am literally starting to think of her as my enemy! Oh and she's fat! I have thought about speaking to her but in all honesty she is arrogant, owns the place as her parents bought her the house and she wouldn't be one to listen. I also hate living in animosty though it is getting that way now anyway to be honest. Anyone experienced anything like this? Financially this is a casual arrangement so no lease etc. I was planning on leaving but also when I do make her aware of exactly why, maybe by sending a note at some point. Her behaviour is so rude and her pompus nature is disgusting, I feel like she needs to be told. I just don't want to have to tell her whilst I have to sleep under the same roof. Any advice?
Happy Fox Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Just tell her she is beautiful and you want to go out on a date then she will be normal.
kingfox Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Graffiti her bathroom wall, take a shit in the toilet, but don't flush. Get your bag and walk out.
21st Century Fox Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Move to a squat in Stokes Croft or bone her. But seriously just casually look for somewhere else and if it doesn't get better ramp up the search. Redland is nice.
Simmo86 Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Look for another place on the quiet, see if the situation improves if it doesn't move out. Or as others have said give her a portion of your pork sword.
Tielemans63 Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Kill her. Solid advice there. It's a win -win scenario.
Zingari Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 This has got the makings of a hilarious sitcom. I think Lee Mack should play the part of you .
Zingari Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Maybe we could tweak a few of the characters . How about not making the landlady fat ?
Jon the Hat Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 How about we turn it around, make them mid 30s, Lee Mack can play the annoying one, and the land lady can be fit.
kyleolly Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 She's just sexually frustrated, bang her and everything will be fine!
Zingari Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Eat her cake. Is that one of those “ooh errr missus†double entendre thingies ?
LanguedocFox Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Contrary to what others have suggested, do not - under any circumstances - shag her. From what you have said, it's quite likely that, halfway through, she'll look up at you and say something like "You're not very good at this, are you?" or, even worse, "Do you think Leicester City will get promoted next season, then?" Think what that will do for your landlady/tenant relationship. Look around for somewhere else and go at a moment's notice: much safer all round.
Vlad the Fox Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Is that one of those “ooh errr missus†double entendre thingies ? Ha ha. Lame, but yes.
Zingari Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Contrary to what others have suggested, do not - under any circumstances - shag her. From what you have said, it's quite likely that, halfway through, she'll look up at you and say something like "You're not very good at this, are you?" or, even worse, "Do you think Leicester City will get promoted next season, then?" Think what that will do for your landlady/tenant relationship. Look around for somewhere else and go at a moment's notice: much safer all round. i like it when a voice of experience chips in
Vlad the Fox Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 An house mate of mine used to sleep with his eyes open. Made it difficult to play tricks on him as when we snook into his room we would never know if he was asleep or not. In the end when we (me and the other housemate) used to get back from the pub we used to take any guests we'd brought back up to view this phenomena. He'd be laying on his back, duvet pulled up to his chin with his hands holding the edge of it, staring at you like the undead.
MooseBreath Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 She sounds like she wants to be dominated. That's often the case with slappers who act as though they have a chip on their shoulder. What she's really saying is, "if you were any kind of man you'd bend me over this table right now, lift up my fat flap and violate my anus." I suggest you do just that. If she resists, what's she's really saying is that you need to be more forceful. Bitches always do that shit, screaming for help and shouting that they'll call the police and all that. If she says any of that don't worry, its a sign she's loving it and wants you to keep going.
21st Century Fox Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 She sounds like she wants to be dominated. That's often the case with slappers who act as though they have a chip on their shoulder. What she's really saying is, "if you were any kind of man you'd bend me over this table right now, lift up my fat flap and violate my anus." I suggest you do just that. If she resists, what's she's really saying is that you need to be more forceful. Bitches always do that shit, screaming for help and shouting that they'll call the police and all that. If she says any of that don't worry, its a sign she's loving it and wants you to keep going. Certainly a contender for most disturbing post of the day.
Guest MattP Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 Yep. She's gagging for it mate. Get pissed and make a move.
whoareyaaa Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 I was in a similar situation the only solution is to just move out there is plenty more places to live. Plus why put up with some ****er who you don't even like.
LanguedocFox Posted 26 April 2013 Posted 26 April 2013 I was in a similar situation the only solution is to just move out there is plenty more places to live. Plus why put up with some ****er who you don't even like. He's a City fan, presumably, so he's used to that.
Vacamion Posted 27 April 2013 Posted 27 April 2013 She sounds like she wants to be dominated. That's often the case with slappers who act as though they have a chip on their shoulder. What she's really saying is, "if you were any kind of man you'd bend me over this table right now, lift up my fat flap and violate my anus." I suggest you do just that. If she resists, what's she's really saying is that you need to be more forceful. Bitches always do that shit, screaming for help and shouting that they'll call the police and all that. If she says any of that don't worry, its a sign she's loving it and wants you to keep going.
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