Daftest thing you've ever done.

[jonthefox]

So go on then, what is it?.

 

For me it has to be two things.

1. Today i was in my car and i spent the first half a mile lifting my arse off the seat to see if i could find my car keys 

 

2. I once unwrapped a toffee. I then slung the toffee in the bin and shoved the wrapper in my mouth. 

 

Anyone beat that?.

[Guest MattP]

Tough call. Off the top of my head, far too much stupidity over the years I've forgot most.

 

1. Flew to Vegas drunk, only thought wtf when I woke up and we were landing. Had no money, no cards, no VISA and was supposed to be in work in 2 hours.

 

2. Was in a car that drove to the other Newcastle when we were supposed to be in Gateshead.

 

3. Trying to take on about 4 Greek doorman in Kavos that rendered me beaten to fcuk and in a stinking jail.

[I am Rod Hull]

Once got £200 out of a cash machine and walked off without taking it... Luckily the lad behind me was a good`un and called me back.

[bovril]

Nicked ice creams when working at a cinema and promptly got sacked.

 

Tried hiking a snow-capped mountain when hungover and in walking shoes and nearly killed myself.

[Larry_LCFC]

Tough call. Off the top of my head, far too much stupidity over the years I've forgot most.

 

1. Flew to Vegas drunk, only thought wtf when I woke up and we were landing. Had no money, no cards, no VISA and was supposed to be in work in 2 hours.

 

2. Was in a car that drove to the other Newcastle when we were supposed to be in Gateshead.

 

3. Trying to take on about 4 Greek doorman in Kavos that rendered me beaten to fcuk and in a stinking jail.

How did you resolve that one?

 

I once asked what Hitlers surname was in a History lesson. Took me a minute to work out why everyone had gone silent and were looking at me like I was a ****ing retard.

[Rincewind]

Trying to convince some people that the Coalition are capable of bringing out policies that may have one or two little flaws in them and that David Cameron is not every man's one reason that they would  turn gay.

 

Seriously

I've probably done many other daft things but am not prepared to reveal them on a public message board.

[21st Century Fox]

About 3 weeks ago, I was house sitting in Bristol and got bored so decided to attempt walking to Bath.. and back. All in all I walked about 45 miles and it took me about 10-12 hours. I didn't have the right footwear, came back with blood filled shoes and when I got home I sat down for a while, then stood up and went into shock because I hadn't been off my feet all day.

 

I've done worse but that's a pretty recent one.

[Jace]

Once I was bringing back a girl to my hotel room in Magaluf, must have been around 3am and I had drunk a fair bit. Apparently I gave a very long talk to her about how strict the security was at the hotel and we were not allowed to bring girls back so to act sober and not draw any attention to ourselves when we arrived at reception. As we arrived at reception I walked straight into the glass front doors which hadn't opened automatically and knocked myself out.

[Lamby]

Look for my phone despite it being in my hand.

[sphericalfox]

About 3 weeks ago, I was house sitting in Bristol and got bored so decided to attempt walking to Bath.. and back. All in all I walked about 45 miles and it took me about 10-12 hours. I didn't have the right footwear, came back with blood filled shoes and when I got home I sat down for a while, then stood up and went into shock because I hadn't been off my feet all day.

 

I've done worse but that's a pretty recent one.

Did you sleep that night or did it feel like someone had cut off your eyelids? 

 

[Guest MattP]

Once I was bringing back a girl to my hotel room in Magaluf, must have been around 3am and I had drunk a fair bit. Apparently I gave a very long talk to her about how strict the security was at the hotel and we were not allowed to bring girls back so to act sober and not draw any attention to ourselves when we arrived at reception. As we arrived at reception I walked straight into the glass front doors which hadn't opened automatically and knocked myself out.

 

How did you resolve that one?

 

Unpaid holiday and straight onto a final warning, left a few weeks later.

[LCFC FOX]

Drove to Newquay instead of Torquay when we played them

[bovril]

  This is all brilliant.

[cambridgefox]

Thought I would help my bosses brother out.

I was in the office and he needed someone to fetch a pallet from his unit about 3 miles away.Everyone was busy so I jumped in the works brand new mercedes sprinter and went over.looked around the unit and there was only one small bespoke pallet with a forklift battery( I think)went to call the bosses brother but I had left my phone in the office.oh well as it's the only pallet,it must be that one.one hernia later and getting someone to help me we were loaded.Drove like a cvnt back and was about a mile away when I heard this thud when I went around the bend.The smell,I was choking ,got back acid everywhere in the new van.The boss wasn't happy.Then his brother announced that he had remembered the pallet he wanted was somewhere else.They still mention the time I melted the new van.

[Lamby]

Got a hernia and didn't get it seen to for over 1 and a half years, it was weeks away from killing me.

[21st Century Fox]

I believe I've previously mentioned the time I came out of a pub, walked around the corner and saw a topiary dragon (the actual one: seen below) so I climbed the fence around it, punched it in the face, smashed my hand on the metal frame underneath the foliage, ripped my trousers climbing back over the fence, got stopped by the police with blood pissing out of my hand, my trousers torn up to the groin and unintentially flipped off the police officer by showing him my 'broken' middle finger.

 

[Jace]

Questioning in work wherever a pedometer was something to do with peadophiles

[Solihullfox]

This happened this very morning........I have a nice silver coloured container for tea bags........I have a silver thermos mug which I fill with tea and drink at home and finish in the car on the way to work.......this morning I filled the tea bag container, approx 30 tea bags, with boiling water from the kettle AND even put my two sugars in to it !

Ttttttttttttwat !

[Voll Blau]

Told a joke about the IRA while compering a school concert.

[The Year Of The Fox]

Got a joint bank account with a woman

[The Year Of The Fox]

Chucked smoke grenades originally meant for Watford at home on the rammed dance floor of a bar in coalville

[21st Century Fox]

This isn't my story and is just generally daft but my dad told me this the other day and it deserves to be shared.

 

My dad's friend used to live in Hong Kong and his wife dragged him into trekking into some remote part of the country to see these really rare flowers that only bloom ever 10 years. On the way there they had to cross a brook to reach the flowers, only he went down in the brook and broke his ankle. An emergency helicopter had to come out and pick him up. As it landed it blew the flowers away

[NewburyFox]

Trying to convince some people that the Coalition are capable of bringing out policies that may have one or two little flaws in them and that David Cameron is not every man's one reason that they would turn gay.

Seriously

I've probably done many other daft things but am not prepared to reveal them on a public message board.

Lighten up Kenneth.

[Rincewind]

Lighten up Kenneth.

That was lightning up.

[The Quick Brown Fox]

Nearly killed myself when I was 18 and very drunk. Started showing off juggling and a friend passed me 3 brand new kitchen knives. Dropped the first one i tried to catch and when I went to pick it up there was blood all over my hand, trip to hospital and luckily missed the major veins in my wrist. Scared the crap out of me tho. Never tried juggling knives again.