Trav Le Bleu Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 I assume the implication is that Matt is making up stories? If that's the case and I'm not missing levels of humour that are too complex for text alone, are stories two and three really unbelievable to you? Oh and there's a Newcastle in Wales and another near Stoke. They're everywhere. Of course, which is to say that "the other Newcastle" isn't exactly information. I'd assume he meant Under-Lyme, but hey, it's like when you wake up one day, and realise that you were were born in Newport on the Isle of Wight, so you're not actually Welsh, and breathe a huge sigh of relief! The implication isn't that he is making up stories, it's is rather that to top them, then you have to make stuff up - which has been a vehicle of comedy for - meh, if you have to explain then it's not worth the effort.
Guest MattP Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 The implication isn't that he is making up stories, it's is rather that to top them, then you have to make stuff up - which has been a vehicle of comedy for - meh, if you have to explain then it's not worth the effort. Really? Personally think there at least 10-15 stories in here far better than what I wrote.
Mike Oxlong Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Going on an exchange to the Vatican as a 12 year old choirboy.
Finnegan Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Really? Personally think there at least 10-15 stories in here far better than what I wrote. And Flair's not even cracked out Geordie Boiler, Robbie Williams or the Octostacker yet. Ah, FT folklore.
Trav Le Bleu Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Really? Personally think there at least 10-15 stories in here far better than what I wrote. Yeah I know, but as usual I read three posts before deciding to contribute. Having read on later I thought I might have made it look like as Finners said and considered editting it, but then I thought, people will have already read it anyway, so . Being a fairly sensible and sober chap I have nothing to contribute beyond having gotten into the bath with my socks on.
Mike Oxlong Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Nothing wrong with an edit after a short period of sober reflection.
Guest MattP Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 eing a fairly sensible and sober chap I have nothing to contribute beyond having gotten into the bath with my socks on. Ever had a Mixed Grill in the bath?
Trav Le Bleu Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Ever had a Mixed Grill in the bath? Matt, you live in a different world to me. I can't even get a decent burger in the shower!
Webbo Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Yeah I know, but as usual I read three posts before deciding to contribute. Having read on later I thought I might have made it look like as Finners said and considered editting it, but then I thought, people will have already read it anyway, so . Being a fairly sensible and sober chap I have nothing to contribute beyond having gotten into the bath with my socks on. I thought the third story about Adam Hill's leg was funny.
David Villa Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Mentioning the ending on GTA to a group of people on FoxesTalk..
Trav Le Bleu Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Mentioning the ending on GTA to a group of people on FoxesTalk.. I think the daftest thing you've ever done is somehow made the last thread title you post in your avatar. Is anyone else getting this? Only happens when DV is the last poster.
Guest MattP Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Matt, you live in a different world to me. I can't even get a decent burger in the shower! I've not done it yet, I'm really tempted though, I think it could be dobale on a tray. There is nothing you can't do in a bath except eat. This has to be rectified.
Finnegan Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Ever had a Mixed Grill in the bath? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RewPzVnrdb0
Guest MattP Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 That is absolutely brilliant! Exactly what I have in mind!
Trav Le Bleu Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 I've not done it yet, I'm really tempted though, I think it could be dobale on a tray. There is nothing you can't do in a bath except eat. This has to be rectified. Make sure that your steak doubles as a map of Middle Earth, just to top it off! I'd have thought that eatting in the bath, whilst probably not sensible, isn't that uncommon, especially if you have a nice big bath that you can actually sit up in without being mostly out of the water. Ironically I can imagine eatting in the bath is an opposite end of the spectrum thing, with very rich people in lavish baths spooning caviar into their mouths (or at least, having caviar spooned into their mouths) and at the other end chavs in tin baths with a chip butty in their gob.
Parafox Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Several years ago, as a rookie, my crew-mate told me that the plastic bollards on the chicanes along Wigston Road, Glen Parva, were designed with emergency vehicles in mind and would simply fold over if I drove over them so that we wouldn't have to slow down. Taking him at his word one Sunday I went hurtling along confident that I could bemuse the other road users by not even slowing or swerving through the chicanes. The resulting impact with the vehicle almost launcing into the air and huge bang with crunching-grinding noises as I hit the concrete base and mount was awesomely frightening. Both front wheels were off the ground, spinning in gear, there was oil p!ssing from the sump and smoke and fumes billowing forth. Traffic stopped in front and behind us. There was no hiding place as I got out sheepishly to check the damage, which was considerable. The recovery guys were relentless as were my colleagues when word got out.
Hollism Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Several years ago, as a rookie, my crew-mate told me that the plastic bollards on the chicanes along Wigston Road, Glen Parva, were designed with emergency vehicles in mind and would simply fold over if I drove over them so that we wouldn't have to slow down. Taking him at his word one Sunday I went hurtling along confident that I could bemuse the other road users by not even slowing or swerving through the chicanes. The resulting impact with the vehicle almost launcing into the air and huge bang with crunching-grinding noises as I hit the concrete base and mount was awesomely frightening. Both front wheels were off the ground, spinning in gear, there was oil p!ssing from the sump and smoke and fumes billowing forth. Traffic stopped in front and behind us. There was no hiding place as I got out sheepishly to check the damage, which was considerable. The recovery guys were relentless as were my colleagues when word got out.
21st Century Fox Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Ever had a Mixed Grill in the bath? Has anyone ever eaten on the loo whilst shitting. I find it to be a very poignant moment especially if coupled with listening to The Circle of Life from The Lion King soundtrack at the same time.
Finnegan Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Has anyone ever eaten on the loo whilst shitting. I find it to be a very poignant moment especially if coupled with listening to The Circle of Life from The Lion King soundtrack at the same time. Whilst amusing, I couldn't bring myself to eat food in a toilet. Maybe that's a damning indictment of how disgusting my own bathroom is but I can't actually carry food in there and then still eat it.
The Doctor Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Took a 20 litre bag of beer from a party in Hastings and carried it back to Bradford on public transport. Really ****ing heavy. Oh, and the traditional kettle in the fridge/milk on the kettle dock after making a brew.
cambridgefox Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Ever had a Mixed Grill in the bath?Honestly,my mate used to dip chocolate biscuits in the bath!
jonthefox Posted 26 September 2013 Author Posted 26 September 2013 Whilst amusing, I couldn't bring myself to eat food in a toilet. Maybe that's a damning indictment of how disgusting my own bathroom is but I can't actually carry food in there and then still eat it. We still haven't found the mystery crisp eater in our work shitters.
sphericalfox Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Whilst amusing, I couldn't bring myself to eat food in a toilet. Maybe that's a damning indictment of how disgusting my own bathroom is but I can't actually carry food in there and then still eat it. how big is your bog?
FoxesAreBlue Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 Whilst amusing, I couldn't bring myself to eat food in a toilet. Maybe that's a damning indictment of how disgusting my own bathroom is but I can't actually carry food in there and then still eat it. Couldn't eat on the shitter but have boozed on it a good few times, usually when I'm already well into an all dayer round my mates or something. Same goes for the shower when on holiday on in an away weekend bender etc...
purpleronnie Posted 26 September 2013 Posted 26 September 2013 I did drink my own wee once, I guess that was pretty daft, although i think i read somewhere (The wee times) its supposed to be quite good for you?...so maybe it wasn't that daft.
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