Would you ever contemplate suicide?

[cambridgefox]

This thread has really shocked me how many people suffer from this illness.To me it's a good thing if people can talk about it and it helps on a forum.

Good luck to all suffering .

Today someone cut in at a feeder lane,usually they would get some abuse,however I said to myself this morning I wouldn't after reading this and I didnt.Lets see if I can manage it a week.

[Raj]

I took an overdose when I was 16(about 28 years ago!!).

It was more a cry for help and luckily was saved well before anything bad happened.

Is it natural to have suicidal thoughts even though on the whole life couldn't get much better???

[Raj]

Earlier in the year a work mate killed himself by jumping in front of a train somewhere around Narboro way.

Left behind 2 young kids...imagine how low he must have been to do that.Always was a decent chap too

[Guest ttfn]

I think it is about control.

Terminally ill people live in fear of a painful death and the uncertainty of what lies ahead.

People in debt worry about their future, will they lose their home and possessions?

People who have no job feel hopeless.

Those who care for a dying relative feel helpless to save them.

Social interactions help us to retain control over our lives. Loving parents, loyal friends, pets, partners, children, colleagues, so if we allow our social interactions to be dominated by one entity then we become vulnerable if something happens to them or that interaction breaks down.

I think most of what we categorise as "mental illness" could be cured by a more cohesive society and giving people more control over their lives. I think if somebody is aware of something that will bring them happiness and knows what they need to be doing at the lowest level then they will choose to do that over suicide.

I'm sceptical that drugs and "cbt" are particularly effective solutions although they may help in some cases.

CBT worked wonders for me, having suffered for years from OCD (and for a short time depression). After a 12 week course I'm now "sub-clinical" and whilst I may never be totally normal again I've come to accept that.

If anybody is "struggling" (for want of a better word) please go and see your doctor. Don't be too proud. CBT isn't for everyone but there's a range of treatments out there. You don't have to be miserable.

[Dr The Singh]

Yes

[Buzzell]

I've never contemplated suicide but my father did. He took his own life when I was only three years old. I have questions left unanswered about my father but for some reason I'd like to keep it that way for now. Maybe one day I will seek the truth.

[foxoffderby]

I've never contemplated suicide but my father did. He took his own life when I was only three years old. I have questions left unanswered about my father but for some reason I'd like to keep it that way for now. Maybe one day I will seek the truth.

Sorry to hear that bruv, and thats the reason I couldn't go through with it in the end. The stigma of your son growing up in society knowing his father took his own life. 

[Rincewind]

I think it is about control.

 

Terminally ill people live in fear of a painful death and the uncertainty of what lies ahead.

 

People in debt worry about their future, will they lose their home and possessions?

 

People who have no job feel hopeless.

 

Those who care for a dying relative feel helpless to save them.

 

Social interactions help us to retain control over our lives. Loving parents, loyal friends, pets, partners, children, colleagues, so if we allow our social interactions to be dominated by one entity then we become vulnerable if something happens to them or that interaction breaks down.

 

I think most of what we categorise as "mental illness" could be cured by a more cohesive society and giving people more control over their lives. I think if somebody is aware of something that will bring them happiness and knows what they need to be doing at the lowest level then they will choose to do that over suicide.

 

I'm sceptical that drugs and "cbt" are particularly effective solutions although they may help in some cases.

Pretty much this  If someone is struggling with stress money problems etc then then these can increase if their income is reduced further' A lot of people are too proud to seek help thinking they will be a burden. I think back to what my brother said to me when I was trying to cope with finances 'if you needed an operation you would not do it yourself you woul go to  someone who is qualified. There is no shame in admitting that something is beyond you. He then set up a budgeting plan and took a lot of worry away.

[Alex_LCFC]

Commuting suicide is the most selfish thing anyone could do

[Danno]

Commuting suicide is the most selfish thing anyone could do

What like on a train?

[cambridgefox]

Commuting suicide is the most selfish thing anyone could do

Because they are ill I don't think people are rational in their thoughts,I sort of know where you're coming from re jumping infront of a train,car etc where a 3rd party is involved,but what a dark place you must be in to contemplate that.

[DennisNedry]

I have thought quite deeply about suicide a few times.

 

By that I mean I have lay awake at night imagining all of the details in my mind. How I would do it, where I would go to do it. I even have a suicide 'letter' saved in My Documents on my laptop in case it ever happens. I've played through the scenarios in my mind of family and friends finding out and how it will affect them. I too in the past have spent time on forums devoted to depression and suicide. But not once have I actually thought 'I'm actually going to do it' or put plans to take my life in to place, as fortunately these depressive spells only seem to last 2 or 3 days and I'm able to ride them out. And then I'll go months without feeling so down again.

 

I don't know how I'd cope with some of the problems previous posts have mentioned. My feelings of depression are not really related to major life events. I just have a general sense of unhappiness and pointlessness in my life, feelings which I'm sure afflict many people. Strangely though, only having the common problems of a crap job and no partner makes you feel worse; as if you don't deserve to feel like shit when so many people have bigger problems than you.

[EnderbyFox]

Agree with Cambridge this thread has certainly been an eye opener, some truly awful situations to have to go through. Certainly puts my petty problems into perspective. 

 

Good luck to anyone who is currently suffering, hope you all get the help you need. 

[Rincewind]

It is easy to say it is selfish act if you have no reason to contemplate. Taking pills is one thing but as cambridge says you have to be in a dark place to even think about it if it involves others.

When I was in hospital it was because I was got confused about pills I was on. I dialed for an ambulance to be checked over and as you know ended up in the RI. It was not until I was ready to leave that I found out that they thought I had took  a deliberate overdose. A social worker chatted to me alone and thankfully I eventually convinced her I hadnot that idea in mind. Still a bit awkward when my brother came to see me as that is what he had been told so it may have got around the  rest of the family so if they are that concerned with an accident I dread to think how they would feel if I did do it.

I always tell myself tomorrow will be the best day in my life. You never know. Some 20 year old model (female) will fall madly in love with me. Something to look forward to.

[Crinklyfox]

I've been absolutely amazed by the number of responses to this question, thanks to the OP for raising the issue.

 

Like other posters I've had some dark times and the thought has crossed my mind, but looking at things logically I didn't want to end my life, I just wanted to stop the pain.  Twenty years ago I was suffering from a recurrent problem that I thought I could deal with but found that although I could take the blows that hit me when it first started repeated problems reduced my ability to cope little by little until every blow felt like it was crushing.  That's when I thought of ending it all but couldn't do it as I was a father and I knew that I would be letting my children down.  Now in happier times I can put some perspective on this but at the time I was wrapped in my own world of problems and wasn't thinking logically.  Now if tell myself if I feel bad, did I feel this bad last year?  The answer's no so I could feel better next year, or next month, or tomorrow, so carry on.

 

As an aside I read Willie Thorne's autobiography, the first chapter of which deals with his attempted suicide.  It's worth reading for anyone who finds themselves contemplating this action.

 

Good luck to the posters in the dark places right now and I hope that you have brighter tomorrows.

[foxoffderby]

Commuting suicide is the most selfish thing anyone could do

It is, I use to think exactly the same. But life is not simple it beats you to a pulp sometimes. Not being able to cope with the day to day dramas affects people in different ways. I was shocked when Gary Speed did it. He seemed to have everything a great career, money a wife a family. He was on MOTD the night before and seemed fine. Who knows what demons he had inside him. I now think the act being selfish is too simplistic. People need to seek professional help. Depression is a mental illness just like diabeties for example and people need help and support.

[Guest]

Foxes Never Quit.

[Jon the Hat]

Suicide isn't a selfish act - that implies knowing it will devastate your family but doing it anyway. Based of everything I have read, people who are in that dark a place think they will make those around them better off and happier by being dead. Not selfish in that context.

[Carl the Llama]

I'm not being funny, but watching the team pull of the great escape has helped me a lot seeing that even when things look impossible it can actually get better. It's certainly caused me to view events in the past few weeks in a more optimistic manner than I might otherwise have done so.

[Freesolo]

I agree that suicide is not selfish, to be in that mind frame you would have tunnel vision, no options or way out then one day you realise you don't have to take this pain anymore and can end it. Most people who say it's selfish have never felt truly depressed, hopeless and suicidal.

[Rincewind]

I get annoyed when people with depression and related illnesses are judged and assessed by those not qualified earnings  reduced or stopped altogether. I do not have qualifications regarding it so I would want those that are to make decisions

There are so many hidden illnesses that can bring on depression. Some are day to day others are occasionally.

My sister and her husband have a friend who seems pefectly fine for most of the time. Every few months he has a  wierd patch. He is verbally abusive to his partner and does strange things. Once he cut down the trees in the front garden because he could not see out the window. He regrets his actions after.

[Rob1742]

About 25 years ago there were two couples who lived next door to each other opposite where I lived and they didn't get on.

They were in their sixties, so not young and there was minor conflict between the couples. Nothing serious atall, but they didn't like each other.

One of the couples went on holiday, and the day before they returned, the guy in the other couple told his wife he was just popping out for a while.

He never returned and eventually the police were called.

The following day, the other couple returned from their holiday, drove down their drive and opened the garage to put their car away, only to find their neighbour dead hanging in the garage.

Not sure how planned it was, but for sure he wanted to have one last go at his neighbour before he left the earth.

It was quite chilling for me at the time, real spooky, but I am sure the affect it had on the neighbours who found him would have been pretty awful

[Rincewind]

Wonder if he knew the time they were due back and it was supposed to be a sick joke with him escaping just after being discovered? Ie chair was not supposed to fall over.

Silly idea  but I have a wierd imagination.

[Stadt]

Wonder if he knew the time they were due back and it was supposed to be a sick joke with him escaping just after being discovered? Ie chair was not supposed to fall over.

Silly idea  but I have a wierd imagination.

I doubt it Ken.

[Parafox]

I'm genuinely surprised by the responses to this thread. I never expected the open and honest replies from so many.

 

It's taken me aback a little that there are actually so many from such a local forum as this.

 

Those that have bared their soul, it's brave to do so and I thank you.

 

All I can say is that I hope we never meet in sad circumstances and I hope you manage to find the peace and the hope, in order to keep moving forward.  The consequences of someone taking their own life reach much further than many probaly realise.

 

Darko, my thoughts are with you. Your situation is unimaginable for almost all of us here and never in a millioin years did I expect to hear a story like that when I made the OP. I sincerely hope you get all the support, professionally and from those that care about you and that helps you to make the most of the time you have with your son

Edited 8 June 2015 by Parafox