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BigGibbo

How Was Your Day?

By BigGibbo, in General Chat

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Izzy

Izzy

Posted
Posted

My 11 year old daughter came home from school in floods of tears again. She's been bullied on and off since year 2 and this time she was slapped in the face by another girl at lunchtime (conveniently out of sight of the dinner ladies)

 

So I'll be off to see the Headmistress again in the morning to sort it out. No doubt my daughter will get an apology from the girl and things will die down for a bit - and then start up again after half term.

 

My daughter is a bit like me in that she avoids conflict so her response is 'flight' or 'freeze' rather than fight back. I too was bullied at school (another ginger victim :() so I know what she's going through.

 

We should have changed schools but she's just done her 11+ so it's hardly worth it now.

 

I hate bullies and I hate the feeling of helplessness as a parent.

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Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
18 minutes ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

My 11 year old daughter came home from school in floods of tears again. She's been bullied on and off since year 2 and this time she was slapped in the face by another girl at lunchtime (conveniently out of sight of the dinner ladies)

 

So I'll be off to see the Headmistress again in the morning to sort it out. No doubt my daughter will get an apology from the girl and things will die down for a bit - and then start up again after half term.

 

My daughter is a bit like me in that she avoids conflict so her response is 'flight' or 'freeze' rather than fight back. I too was bullied at school (another ginger victim :() so I know what she's going through.

 

We should have changed schools but she's just done her 11+ so it's hardly worth it now.

 

I hate bullies and I hate the feeling of helplessness as a parent.

 

That's horrible, Izzy. 

 

Would getting her some martial arts training be an option, just to give her some confidence?

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Izzy

Izzy

Posted
Posted
8 minutes ago, Buce said:

 

That's horrible, Izzy. 

 

Would getting her some martial arts training be an option, just to give her some confidence?

Yeah we've considered this mate. My thoughts are that even if she was skilled in martial arts, she'd still just stand there and do nothing.

 

She's a bit of a fvck up as a kid just like I was really. She hates being out of control and is a big perfectionist. She tries too hard to fit in and is a real stress head - even at 11 years old. 

 

I fear she'll follow in my footsteps of anxiety and depression later down the line. I can see so many of my negative traits in her. 

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Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

Yeah we've considered this mate. My thoughts are that even if she was skilled in martial arts, she'd still just stand there and do nothing.

 

She's a bit of a fvck up as a kid just like I was really. She hates being out of control and is a big perfectionist. She tries too hard to fit in and is a real stress head - even at 11 years old. 

 

I fear she'll follow in my footsteps of anxiety and depression later down the line. I can see so many of my negative traits in her. 

 

Yeah, but it's as much about building confidence as learning to fight. 

 

I wasn't a confident kid until I learned to box. 

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Izzy

Izzy

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, Buce said:

 

Yeah, but it's as much about building confidence as learning to fight. 

 

I wasn't a confident kid until I learned to box. 

Fair point, I'll speak to the wife and look at local places. Good idea, cheers :thumbup:

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Danno

Danno

Posted
Posted
On 16/09/2017 at 15:21, Wookie said:

Thanks, I'm going to Hallam and staying at Central Quay. Even now I'm in the car 20 minutes away and it doesn't feel like I'm about to start uni - maybe when I'm steaming later on I'll feel less like an imposter lol ! 

Nice, i was there in my first year. Currently on work placement abroad! 

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Turbogre

Turbogre

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

My 11 year old daughter came home from school in floods of tears again. She's been bullied on and off since year 2 and this time she was slapped in the face by another girl at lunchtime (conveniently out of sight of the dinner ladies)

 

So I'll be off to see the Headmistress again in the morning to sort it out. No doubt my daughter will get an apology from the girl and things will die down for a bit - and then start up again after half term.

 

My daughter is a bit like me in that she avoids conflict so her response is 'flight' or 'freeze' rather than fight back. I too was bullied at school (another ginger victim :() so I know what she's going through.

 

We should have changed schools but she's just done her 11+ so it's hardly worth it now.

 

I hate bullies and I hate the feeling of helplessness as a parent.

Disgusting! 

 

If I was in your shoes, I would visit the parents of said girl and tackle them with the issue.

 

Hope it gets sorted as quick as possible, nobody should have to put up with being bullied.

 

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Milo

Milo

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

My 11 year old daughter came home from school in floods of tears again. She's been bullied on and off since year 2 and this time she was slapped in the face by another girl at lunchtime (conveniently out of sight of the dinner ladies)

 

So I'll be off to see the Headmistress again in the morning to sort it out. No doubt my daughter will get an apology from the girl and things will die down for a bit - and then start up again after half term.

 

My daughter is a bit like me in that she avoids conflict so her response is 'flight' or 'freeze' rather than fight back. I too was bullied at school (another ginger victim :() so I know what she's going through.

 

We should have changed schools but she's just done her 11+ so it's hardly worth it now.

 

I hate bullies and I hate the feeling of helplessness as a parent

Good shout about the martial arts thing from a couple of the guys. Bad news about your daughter, mate. Horrible feeling - My 9 year old son was being given a bit of grief last year (just playground stuff, but one of the older boys had decided to pick on him) I was a little torn as to just let them get on with it or do something about it...it escalated so we reported it but then my wife decided to sign him up to martial arts classes.I take him every Saturday morning and it's great - their main slogan is 'Say no to bullies' and they teach a huge amount of self confidence and life skills to the kids. Would highly recommend. (I think the one that we use is only local to me..? kungfuschools.co.uk) 

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Kopfkino

Kopfkino

Posted
Posted (edited)
7 minutes ago, Wookie said:

At Hallam or Central Quay? What are you studying?

 

I just had a little nosey at Central Quay to see where it was in Sheffield compared to where a friend is staying. But wow you get a great deal for your money. In first year, I had to pay £130 a week for a shared room which also didn't cover holidays as they were used to subsidise rent. The perks of Central Londonlol. Did get 6 dinners a week and brunch on Saturday though. In fact to get similar to yours at LSE, it would be 250 a week.

Edited by KingGTF
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Countryfox

Countryfox

Posted
Posted

Well @Buce ...   sneaked round the back of the house ...   tiptoed past the mother in law (who was servicing her broomstick) , dived in a taxi and caught a plane to Frankfurt ! ...    just had a lovely meal with an old mate and now off on the town ...     happy days !!     :)

 

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Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
5 minutes ago, Countryfox said:

Well @Buce ...   sneaked round the back of the house ...   tiptoed past the mother in law (who was servicing her broomstick) , dived in a taxi and caught a plane to Frankfurt ! ...    just had a lovely meal with an old mate and now off on the town ...     happy days !!     :)

 

 

Nice one.

 

And my invitation is still in the post, I assume?

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Izzy

Izzy

Posted
Posted
17 minutes ago, Turbogre said:

Disgusting! 

 

If I was in your shoes, I would visit the parents of said girl and tackle them with the issue.

 

Hope it gets sorted as quick as possible, nobody should have to put up with being bullied.

 

Thanks mate. We know the parents of the girl and where they live so my instinct was to go round and confront them about it face to face.

 

But my wife says we're supposed to go through the school to sort it out instead. I'm sure it will get sorted but hate seeing my kid so upset. 

 

 

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Izzy

Izzy

Posted
Posted
15 minutes ago, Milo said:

Good shout about the martial arts thing from a couple of the guys. Bad news about your daughter, mate. Horrible feeling - My 9 year old son was being given a bit of grief last year (just playground stuff, but one of the older boys had decided to pick on him) I was a little torn as to just let them get on with it or do something about it...it escalated so we reported it but then my wife decided to sign him up to martial arts classes.I take him every Saturday morning and it's great - their main slogan is 'Say no to bullies' and they teach a huge amount of self confidence and life skills to the kids. Would highly recommend. (I think the one that we use is only local to me..? kungfuschools.co.uk) 

Cheers mate. Sounds like martial arts is the way forward. Will definitely sign her up and hopefully it gives her more confidence to stick up for herself.

 

Its tough and I feel really sorry for her being so timid and weak. She's as skinny as a rake and a bit of a nerd so an easy target I guess...

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Milo

Milo

Posted
Posted
8 minutes ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

Cheers mate. Sounds like martial arts is the way forward. Will definitely sign her up and hopefully it gives her more confidence to stick up for herself.

 

Its tough and I feel really sorry for her being so timid and weak. She's as skinny as a rake and a bit of a nerd so an easy target I guess...

Haha - mine is a skinny nerd too (gets it from his mother...[the nerd bit, not so much the skinny bit these days] :ph34r:)

 

But mine is a bit gobby, so I sometimes think that he might deserve some of the grief he gets (can't imagine where he gets his gobby nature from, tbh...)

 

I was really surprised at the kung fu classes - they are really good fun and are designed to shout down bullies - the mantra is that the kids shout "BACK OFF" when confronted, then do a little move on the bully and run away..!

 

Good luck - at least we live in an era where schools are a lot more aware and a lot less tolerant of bullies that in the past. 

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Jattdogg

Jattdogg

Posted
Posted
6 hours ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

My 11 year old daughter came home from school in floods of tears again. She's been bullied on and off since year 2 and this time she was slapped in the face by another girl at lunchtime (conveniently out of sight of the dinner ladies)

 

So I'll be off to see the Headmistress again in the morning to sort it out. No doubt my daughter will get an apology from the girl and things will die down for a bit - and then start up again after half term.

 

My daughter is a bit like me in that she avoids conflict so her response is 'flight' or 'freeze' rather than fight back. I too was bullied at school (another ginger victim :() so I know what she's going through.

 

We should have changed schools but she's just done her 11+ so it's hardly worth it now.

 

I hate bullies and I hate the feeling of helplessness as a parent.

Give me names and addresses. Last time this bully will mess with your daughter. 

 

 

 

 

No im not going to beat up an 11 year old. Just a good old hard punjabi slap on the back. You know, encouragement on what not to do :)

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ozleicester

ozleicester

Posted
Posted
11 hours ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

My 11 year old daughter came home from school in floods of tears again. She's been bullied on and off since year 2 and this time she was slapped in the face by another girl at lunchtime (conveniently out of sight of the dinner ladies)

 

So I'll be off to see the Headmistress again in the morning to sort it out. No doubt my daughter will get an apology from the girl and things will die down for a bit - and then start up again after half term.

 

My daughter is a bit like me in that she avoids conflict so her response is 'flight' or 'freeze' rather than fight back. I too was bullied at school (another ginger victim :() so I know what she's going through.

 

We should have changed schools but she's just done her 11+ so it's hardly worth it now.

 

I hate bullies and I hate the feeling of helplessness as a parent.

Awful. Sorry for you all.

Home Schooling! If I had my time with my daughter again

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