What grinds my gears...

[Daggers]

I woke this morning, joyfully reaching for my tablet, looking forward to being able to listen to normal morning news on normal radio.

 

…Only they’re still banging on about a dead fvcking monarch.
 

It’s almost like “they” don’t want you focussing on real issues. 6:18 and I’m swearing like a sweary thing.

[Silebyfox_89]

"Smashed" burgers. 

[isaidno]

East Midlands Railways.  Charging £10 admin fee to cancel a ticket. 

[Captain...]

14 minutes ago, isaidno said:

East Midlands Railways.  Charging £10 admin fee to cancel a ticket. 

Admin fees full stop. It's all fooking automated these days.

[Mike Oxlong]

Smudgie poos. Just create unnecessary work and wastes paper. Surely, clean poos have to be the next jump on our evolutionary ascent, or even better, no poos at all. 

[Julian Joachim Jr Shabadoo]

4 minutes ago, Mike Oxlong said:

Smudgie poos. Just create unnecessary work and wastes paper. Surely, clean poos have to be the next jump on our evolutionary ascent, or even better, no poos at all. 

I wish there was a pill you could take that would guarantee you a fuss-free dump every day. I never know what I'm in for regardless of what I eat

 

16 hours ago, Silebyfox_89 said:

"Smashed" burgers. 

I hate that phrase. Isn't "smash" just exactly how burgers were traditionally made before we had preformed stuff? It's just a burger

 

If I order a smash burger, I expect it to contain rehydrated instant mash

[The Bear]

You lot are lucky to have normal poos. 

 

I have moderate/severe Ulcerative Colitis (inflammatory bowel disease) and I'm lucky if it isn't coming out like a fire hydrant most days. 

[Izzy]

33 minutes ago, The Bear said:

You lot are lucky to have normal poos. 

 

I have moderate/severe Ulcerative Colitis (inflammatory bowel disease) and I'm lucky if it isn't coming out like a fire hydrant most days. 

I’m the same if it’s any consolation 

 

Had my large bowel removed in ‘04 due to initial UC diagnosis which has since been re diagnosed as Crohn’s disease.

 

I probably go 6-8 times a day and ‘coming out like a fire hydrant’ is an accurate analogy!

[RumbleFox]

People that refer to the bus driver as simply “driver”. 
 

“Thanks driver”.

 

[RumbleFox]

Oh and also, unsolicited advice. 

[taupe]

Politician interviews on R4's Today programme;

 

Politician: So, let me be clear, um er em er, statistically speaking, um er um er, we've invested more in the last period than the previous government, um er um er, shambles under previous government, way forward, um er em er

 

Interviewer: but surely you don't advocate the slaughter of innocent babies? 

[String fellow]

Folk who say 'one pence'.

[Blarmy]

3 hours ago, String fellow said:

Folk who say 'one pence'.

Rather than saying what?

[Dunge]

30 minutes ago, Blarmy said:

Rather than saying what?

One of your finest pence.

[String fellow]

41 minutes ago, Blarmy said:

Rather than saying what?

One penny, 'Pence' (and 'pennies' in another context) is the plural of the noun 'penny', so 'one pence' is grammatically wrong. It's the equivalent of saying 'one pounds'.

Edited 23 September 2022 by String fellow

[Brizzle Fox]

7 hours ago, RumbleFox said:

People that refer to the bus driver as simply “driver”. 
 

“Thanks driver”.

 

Or "cheers drive" as they tend to say in the South West

[kingkisnorbo]

The phrase "cheat code" being used to describe players. Irks me. 

[Parafox]

1 hour ago, Brizzle Fox said:

Or "cheers drive" as they tend to say in the South West

I used to get "thanks drive" when I drove HGV's delivering to supermarkets. I usually responded with "no probs, operative".

Edited 23 September 2022 by Parafox

[Blarmy]

2 hours ago, String fellow said:

One penny, 'Pence' (and 'pennies' in another context) is the plural of the noun 'penny', so 'one pence' is grammatically wrong. It's the equivalent of saying 'one pounds'.

Ah nice, never knew that! Cheers!

[kingkisnorbo]

‘ITK’s’ dropping spurious, vague things into the Rodgers thread then never elaborating. Acting as if they’re handling government secrets or something. 

[RonnieTodger]

Open letters. 

[marbles]

9 hours ago, kingkisnorbo said:

‘ITK’s’ dropping spurious, vague things into the Rodgers thread then never elaborating. Acting as if they’re handling government secrets or something. 

It works the same way as Mediums.  Tiny vague bits of info that make you think “maybe they know something”, when in reality it’s just a guess or flat out lie.
“ITK” are always dropping stuff around this forum.  Yet what they drop is so insignificant, that you forget about it quickly, and thus unable to call them on their BS “insider info” later on.

Edited 24 September 2022 by marbles

[Nalis]

Two terms I've heard yesterday for the first time in their Gen Z context and sadly know now what they mean.

 

Ratio and Wageys.

 

Both terms are fvckin stupid.

[Foxdiamond]

Bingo adverts on TV

[Unabomber]

People who slow down to a crawl over speed bumps. Ironically makes the impact more pronounced. 

Edited 27 September 2022 by Unabomber