Alternative End of Season Awards

[CrazyKopCorner]

It's coming round to the end of season awards but it's been such a shitshow that an alternative award presentation is required. 

 

I'll start 

 

Woeful Player of the Season - Has to be Wout ****ing Faes - Total and utter shite and absolutely no commitment to the cause whatsoever. The sooner the frizzy haired tw@t ****s off the better

 

Supporters disdain for a player award - Has to be Faes  

 

Worst Team Performance  - Numerous - Brentford away was a personal low 

 

Worst individual performance - Ward Vs Wolves - Truly shocking 

 

Worst goal conceded - The 4th at Everton - Under 11's stuff (unfair on the kids that) 

 

Worst Young Player - Don't know - not played 

 

The Wooden Spoon (alternative to golden boot) - Daka - Couldn't hit a cows arse with a banjo 

 

Worst Signing - Has to be Odsonne Edouard closely followed by Skipp 

 

[goose2010]

Worst performance has to be Wolves at home. 

[foxfan92]

I think you're being overly negative here. We should be having positive titles to reward moments of rarity this season.

 

Things like:

 

Award for the full back who made a forward pass.

 

Award for the defender who tracked their man.

 

Award for the player who had a shot on target.

 

(Although if we can't find anyone for this, maybe: Award for the player who attempted  any kind of shot).

 

Award for the pensioner who lasted the full game.

 

There must be at least one player who did some of these things once this season, maybe 🤔 

[Pliskin]

Woeful Player of the Season - Joint between Awey and Faes. 

 

Supporters disdain for a player award - Joint Faes and Ayew.

 

Worst Team Performance  - Wolves 

 

Worst individual performance - Ward V Wolves. 

 

Worst goal conceded - All 3 of Wolves goals. 

 

Worst Young Player - Victor Kristiensen. 

 

The Wooden Spoon (alternative to golden boot) - Daka, I’ve seen better finishing in a smackheads brothel. 

 

Worst Signing - Combination of Edouard, Ayew, Bobby Ried and Skipp. 

[Danizen]

Good Boy of the Season: Vesty's dog (it's not his fault, his owner's a cvnt.

Edited 6 April by Danizen

[CrazyKopCorner]

1 hour ago, foxfan92 said:

I think you're being overly negative here. We should be having positive titles to reward moments of rarity this season.

 

Things like:

 

Award for the full back who made a forward pass.

 

Award for the defender who tracked their man.

 

Award for the player who had a shot on target.

 

(Although if we can't find anyone for this, maybe: Award for the player who attempted  any kind of shot).

 

Award for the pensioner who lasted the full game.

 

There must be at least one player who did some of these things once this season, maybe 🤔 

Brilliant 

[Nalis]

Player most likely to use this season as banteriffic content for podcasts as if they weren't part of the shit

 

Player most likely to play OK only for a 10 minute spell every half a season to cue the screams of 'you see! He IS brilliant it's someone else fault he hasnt been performing'

Edited 6 April by Nalis

[sdb]

It's actually astonishing isn't it. You cannot exaggerate how bad things are.

[RYM]

The most deluded / stale / out of touch / out of his depth / smirk slipping and now panicking a lot Communications Director award…..? 

[Chelmofox]

Need an award for the best Pukka pie?

[FOXSE]

Commuter of the season: winks.

[RYM]

24 minutes ago, Chelmofox said:

Need an award for the best Pukka pie?

That was the Paulo Sousa Piri Piri Pie when I was challenged by my boss at Jobsite to use social media to create something as I wanted a job in Marketing!!! True story. 
One of the Cringiest things I’ve done but they did make about 12 for a press day before he then got sacked…

 

They now sell them…🤣

[honeybradger]

Best team atmosphere - the whole squad apparently despite getting bent over every week.

[whoareyaaa]

Best actor : Wout Faes

[Vacamion]

 

The Best Scouse Cheerleader Award.

 

The Spurs Medal of Distinction for Actually Losing To [Waves Vaguely] This.

 

Best Managerial Rollneck Sweater.

 

The Bouba Soumaré Jogging Whilst Shrugging Prize.

 

Ex-Spurs Midfielder of The Season.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Nolucklcfc]

Everton away was as bad as I can remember but there’s been so many. 

[VLC86]

Worst goal conceded is Wolves’ second and nothing comes close. The guy didn’t even shoot and scored  

[Winstonthedog]

9 hours ago, foxfan92 said:

I think you're being overly negative here. We should be having positive titles to reward moments of rarity this season.

 

Things like:

 

Award for the full back who made a forward pass.

 

Award for the defender who tracked their man.

 

Award for the player who had a shot on target.

 

(Although if we can't find anyone for this, maybe: Award for the player who attempted  any kind of shot).

 

Award for the pensioner who lasted the full game.

 

There must be at least one player who did some of these things once this season, maybe 🤔 

How about award for  .... the player who looks like an interested professional 

[Spiritwalker]

7 minutes ago, VLC86 said:

Worst goal conceded is Wolves’ second and nothing comes close. The guy didn’t even shoot and scored  

The first at Everton, you’d be unlikely to see defending like that at U8’s.

[Arkie Bennett]

Longest commute of the season...

[whetstonefox]

9 hours ago, Danizen said:

Good Boy of the Season: Vesty's dog (it's not his fault, his owner's a cvnt.

Should have entered him into crufts. Though the way this season has gone he’d have bitten a child and ended up being put down.

[urban.spaceman]

Best Dog Owner Of The Season

 

Best Director Of Football Award

 

Best Ruud Awakening Gag

 

Best Roy Cropper Moment

 

Best Reason For Supporter Bans

[onekeithweller]

Manager of the Season - Steve Cooper

[Bert]

We’re all voting for Edouard as POTS aren’t we?

[Foxes1]

Young player of the year Jamie Vardy.